This forum exhausts me

As a host, owner and manager who travels extensively I have tried really hard to be part of this forum, but the constant need to belittle me and the lack of support by members means I am nearly done. I come on here to learn and share and I have learnt lots but the “sharing” part of it seems not to work for me.

I have been batting back and forth for months as people find fault with me rather that using the issues I experience as a guest and a host to open a healthy discussion.


Sorry – I haven’t seen any of the activity that you say you’re experiencing.


HI Poppy,

I tend to skim and occassional comment but have always felt that your comments, questions have been helpful.

I do agree that just like the guests we host, can also be" judgy".


Thanks, that’s the nicest thing that a member of the this forum has said to me publicly. I just don’t think I can waste any more time and energy on justifying my existence on this forum.


Oh @Poppy

I have just read through the post I think you are referring to, regarding your recent guests and I would say about 99% of the feedback you got was well intentioned and useful. Many hosts chipped in with helpful advice and support.

If you look through his posts @Brandt often makes sarcastic responses on here. I have been at the sharp end of his ‘humour’ on more than one occasion. Now I just ignore them.

I haven’t seen anywhere a ‘constant need to belittle you’.

If you find the forum useful then continue to be an active member and ignore the negatives.

If you don’t then I am sure there are other forums out there that might work better for you.


Thank you for your message but this has been going on for weeks, today I am tired of it.

Well best of luck then .

Airbnb Community forums is a useful alternative maybe have a look there and see if that works for you.

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I too just re-read your other thread, Villa vs Unit…

If this forum has a benefit for you then stay, if not then go. If you stay then
take the best and leave the rest.



Yes it certainly can be exhausting at times. For example now we have two threads going about essentially the same thing. And this thread makes no sense unless one is familiar with the other threads you reference, but in particular this one.

You say you want a “healthy discussion” but you are not willing to entertain the possibility that you are at fault? Hmm. In any Airbnb transaction there are a few avenues to explore: it’s the host’s fault, the guest’s fault, Airbnb’s fault, no ones fault. So you are trying to tell strangers on the internet that one fourth of the explanations are off the table. This is the second time members of the forum have suggested that the use of the term villa may be problematic. The other post was titled too small and not good value so many forum members focused on that trying to figure out why someone would say that.

You see the issue as one of why would someone give up $600. You’ve also said these are apartments for special romantic weekends. Very much upscale for special occasions. I’m not familiar with all the housing in Australia so maybe couples from Melbourne shouldn’t expect stand alone homes but in most of the english speaking world they would.

As for the issue of the exhausting forum…every time we get a complaint about the forum I say the same: it’s the internet. You can’t control what people say. Unless people are violating the forum TOS (insulting people, engaging in hate speech) it’s going to stand. There was a case where you posted something and no one commented on it and just scrolled past. Then you made a separate post about it. Then people commented and you complained about the comments. It appears we are following a pattern here.


A forum is not like a room full of friends, although genuine friendships can develop. You have to pick out the useful bits. If there are not enough useful bits, there are other sources of information. A truly “exhausting battle” is trying to change the nature of internet/forum communications!
The best use of the forum for me is 1) tips and suggestions, 2) commiseration and laughs. The worst use of the forum for me is trying to get a universe of strangers to validate that I am right or some sort of expert. I’ve tried that and, guess what, not gonna happen! Nice meeting you virtually, I appreciated some of your marketing ideas. Happy hosting in the future to you.


Just don’t respond if you think someone isn’t being nice. Too many people here want to have the last word and go back and forth for days over stupid stuff. It would be nice if everyone could be nice but that’s not how people are.


Hi Poppy
I hope you don’t leave. I really enjoy reading your posts.
You are such a classy lady. Maybe just take a break and then come back?

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I’ve felt beaten up a time or two in this forum. You are not alone. For me the overarching reason for staying is that I’ve learned a great deal from this forum. Perhaps take a pause, deep breathe, and continue to read threads and when you are ready, resume participation.


I do think that something put in writing can appear blunt or harsh. I have certainly read such a tone on posts in this forum; within a context that might have been written as such by the poster or it might be inferred by the reader. People are going to post their opinions as they see fit - they are entitled to within the confines of the forum rules - the choice is how to take it. As other have advised, you can ignore or not address such comments and focus on ones you perceive to be more helpful. Not everyone is going to be or come across as pleasant or all accomodating.


@Poppy -

“Why has no one asked me how I earn 10,000 a month”

I believe it is the title of this thread that set the tone for many of us. It broadcasts the idea that you feel all of us have something to learn from you. It may have gotten you off on the wrong foot. You may want to consider changing the title of the thread. For many of us, bragging about the money brought in on the rental is not … well, cool.

There are novice hosts here, yes, but a lot of us are quite seasoned. Years, and in some cases, decades. Yes, decades. Vacation rentals did not start with Airbnb.

Chill, honey. Listen to other folks. Don’t be defensive. Help other people.


Lol, I had no idea who wrote that because I refused to look at it. I was like, this seems spammy!

I am sure it was a riveting thread though.


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Re spam, indeed.

As with all online communities there are challenges, but this forum has been pretty democratic in how it treats small shared accommodations, stand alone homes, and large high-volume hosting. The majority of Airbnb listings are still shared homes - a suite, a bedroom, a basement - with the host onsite. The income from a property like that is limited, but it is the life blood of Airbnb and the forum. We don’t care how much money a host makes for them to bring value to the forum. We care that 1) you’re getting what you want from hosting 2) you’re hosting in a way that you’re proud of and 3) hosting in a way that makes the Airbnb community look good.


No, that was the “things I hate about (changed to pet peeves) Airbnb as a guest.” Ironically poppy has been a member of the forum since 2016.


Agreed. I surrendered in a huff, took time out, and now back like a bad penny. This forum has saved me countless obstacles and all kinds of $.


No shame in that. It’s the internet!