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Hey there, we’re in a delicate situation for our last guests. They’re the family of our AirBnB’s next door neighbors so we gave them a generous discount and did everything to be super accommodating (really wanted to keep a positive relationship and our neighbors happy). The booking guests had a handful of positive reviews, so no red flags.
Anyways, they ended up leaving the house pretty dirty, had extra people stay over and then the icing on the cake: the husband pissing out the front door on camera LOL. Other things too like late checking out and bringing extended family over including little kids (we’re explicit about not being safe for small ones since there’s an open loft) but no permanent damage. They’re just not the type of folks you’d want to stay again.
So now it’s review time and we want to keep the peace with our nextdoor neighbors but their family has already said how they loved the stay and want to come again. So wtf do we do?? Can guests still request a booking, but just not instant book if we mark we wouldn’t book again and mark them down in a bunch of relevant categories?
Wow, that’s a tough one. I’m interested to read if you put “would not host again” whether they can book again. I’m going to Airbnb help and search for the answer.
If they can show up again and your relationship with the neighbor is that important not to cancel, I know the first thing I’d not do is give them ANY discounts. If they somehow could book again, or you decided with some corrective feedback you could make it work, I’d even up the cleaning charge to reflect their use.
Maybe the neighbor will approach you directly and you can find reasons that the place is never available — oh shoot, we can’t that weekend because (fill in the blank.)
After some quick searches, it seems like no one knows for sure the full impact. What I did see is that the guest doesn’t know you marked that button for one thing, which I was aware of. But in terms of booking again, or whether you show up in a search, one host did post this:
“When you click would not host again, it means that the guest will not be able to instantly book with you. The guest can still try to book and it will come through as a request and then you will decline it or give them another chance (this recently happened to me.)”
Here’s another host’s response:
In March 2020, I had a guest who I did not want back. I left him a not-so-great review: “Extra cleaning was required over the allotted cleaning fee.” In January 2021, he tried to book again for another weekend getaway! He couldn’t instant book since I had clicked would not book again so his booking reverted to a request. I had to decline him, saying that due to covid I did not have the time or the energy to clean up his extra mess. I was shocked he felt welcomed to book again but it shows how oblivious some guests are to their reviews.
How well do you know the neighbors? Can you address it with them in a way that sustains/respects your long-term relationship as neighbors?
I would be MORTIFIED if my family members behaved that way – the peeing on camera is particularly wow – and if a host contacted me to say, “I’m so very sorry but I won’t be able to host this group again, and here’s why …” in a calm, professional way, I also wouldn’t hold it against them.
And you’re stuck, right? Because they live next door, they (and visiting family) will probably notice whether the place has guests or not at times when you’ve declined to host. So some sort of explanation is probably necessary.
If you click on “would not host again” they will be blocked and will not be able to book your place again. As for the review, to keep the peace with your neighbors, I would give a pretty generic review.
I agree with this. Take the time to speak to the neighbors calmly and show them the pic of the man pissing outside (are you freaking kidding me??) and if they say “We all piss outside,” bring up the little kids, extra guests, and the fact that you gave a huge discount to be neighborly.
I’d lay out ground rules for another visit along with NO discounts. Perhaps paying full price would dissuade them.
This is one of those times I think it would be ok to be so busy you miss the review deadline and not leave one.
I don’t know if you are required to complete the entire review or if you can select “will not host again”.
I know honesty is the best policy but this is not going to end well, unless he knows these relatives are crude, rude, jackasses. Even then, be careful. As a friend of mine said, “I’ll say what ever I want to about my sister but XYZ better not”.
One of my worst reservations was with family. I decided if they want to book again, I will charge full price & they can book through Airbnb & pay all fees.
Maybe if they try to book again, charge the maximum and see if they rent. At least then you are compensated for the problems.
I would shy away from renting to friends or family of neighbors, unless I knew them well enough to know they’d be mortified to find out how their referral behaved and would be apologetic, rather than defensive or uncaring.
And no, hosts cannot skip over parts of the review. Review them in a way other hosts will be able to understand, while making it not necessarily sound like a bad review if your neighbors read it. I don’t generally like “coded” reviews, but sometimes they have their applications.
I am still renting off platform to the Mom & Dad of two brothers who lived in a group rental house next door – even though the kids have since moved to an apartment. They are lovely people as are their sons, and I give them a super low rate. Very fortunate.
I think you have two choices as others have noted. You’ve kind of unintentionally got stuck in a friend, not business, zone with the neighbor’s family.
One approach is to maintain a cool detente and have the rental always unavailable if asked again. Depending how close the properties are, you may not be able to maintain the illusion of repairs, other guests, or serial covid infections. I would regretfully say that your tax advisor requires you to rent at market rate. At least if they attempt to stay again you’ll get properly paid.
On the other hand, if you want to maintain an interactive relationship with the neighbors, such as asking them to water your plants or borrow their ladder from time to time, I think it needs to be addressed in person.
“Gloria, we were happy to host Bill and hope they had a good time, but I need a favor from you. I don’t monitor my guests but I got a front door camera alert and there was Bill peeing off the front stoop. Kinda hard to unsee that. Could you ask him not to do that if they stay again? The other thing is we don’t normally allow kids under 12 because of the [unfenced pool, sheer cliff, vicious coyotes] and I was really worried the kids visiting could get hurt. Also our insurance only allows us to have a maximum of x people in the rental at any time. So could you keep the kids over at your place? That would be a huge help.”
Neutral review. good guests (lie for the neighbor relationship) then click would not host again. Clean up and move on. IF they try and book again they should not be able to. If they contact you directly then tell them you were not happy with them as guests and tell them why. I doubt they will.
Edit to add, the OP needs to do what is best for their business, the neighbor relationship is more important than an honest review in this case IMHO
In this case, the next door neighbor knows we have an AirBnB and said his sister’s family wanted to book it for their visit. There was really no way to say no (and she had good reviews), so we thought this would be a great opportunity to extend hospitality and keep our neighbors happy.
Hahahaha this is perfect. Thank you- to those that say they don’t think they will book again, the family already said they can’t wait to come back for another stay and I’m sure they’ll ask to book directly if they don’t see it come up on AirBnB. Using every word of this @dpfromva if it comes to it
A tough situation. Agree with others to avoid pissing off your neighbors. Other than some extra cleaning, there was no harm done. You might consider a direct booking, to avoid future rating stuff w/ them - and be nice but clear about “sorry we can’t allow children or visitors other than the booking guests due to insurance policy limitations” and see how the discussion goes.
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Personally, the pee thing doesn’t faze us. No one saw it but you and no harm done there. The one question really for us is how much extra cleaning was needed. 5-15 min, we shrug and move on. It will happen sometimes. But charging full rate next time is fair, so you don’t feel slighted - and if you had charged your normal rate, would you have felt differently?
Good question. Definitely would have felt better about the extra hour or so cleanup hassle (they also raided the backup linen closet and managed to stain 4 bath towels with makeup stains out of the 10 they used).
But the extra $ wouldn’t have changed us being upset about disregarding our clearly stated rules on house capacity and bringing folks over including young children who could have gotten hurt. Next time I wouldn’t be surprised if they pushed the house rules further- maybe a dog or all out throwing a party? We’d rather stop hosting their family at this point without any real damage done.
If you are in the US, giving discounts to people you know or are family will be considered “personal use” and will negatively impact your taxes if you exceed the total personal use allotment. I use that valid reason to turn down requests from friends and family for discounts.
Other countries probably have similar rules. Always a good idea to know the tax rules!
If you’re concerned about your friends and family rate for tax purposes in the event of audit, download a price page from a similar STR for the same dates in your market area that matches or is less than your discounted rate and save for your records. In other words, don’t go too low. Some advisors say that IRS is generally tolerant of good buddy rates in the 10-20% range.
Yes, but this is a good reason to just say “no”. I just tell them I don’t want to mess with the IRS!
Since we have a 3-bedroom whole house rental, we just tell friends and family they can stay at the villa while we are there doing maintenance.
