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Q: How has being a host changed your behavior as a guest?

I attempted to search for this to make sure it hadn’t been asked recently but for obvious reasons (like the words “host” and “guest” appearing in … well, everything here) the search results for a mess.

Anyway: I just booked a weeklong stay with a host in my MIL’s city and found myself writing my intro message quite differently than I would have before. For instance: Since the host lives upstairs, I mentioned that my husband and I will be in and out at different times during the day, mostly working from home and visiting with my MIL, and that we’d like to have my MIL and her partner over for dinner a couple of times – and that if that didn’t work for the host, I would be happy to cancel the reservation and find a new spot. (The host was absolutely lovely about it. Wonder if she’s here – hi!)

It also made me curious whether anyone else has become a better guest because of being a host, and in what ways. I know hosts-as-guests get a bad rap a lot of the time, which is also pretty interesting.

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I did the same thing. I recently booked 2 different places. The first place was a Request so I found myself giving a lot more details and information that I might’ve in the past, if nothing else it was probably information that was more helpful at least (because now I know). The other place was an IB but I still gave a good amount of information. I didn’t want the host to have to do extra messaging to get any information she might want.

I believe I’ve always been a good guest, it was important to me long before I started hosting, but I did not realize how much friggin hair that I must’ve been leaving behind for hosts until I started hosting. I take a lint roller with me now and do a quick hair pickup before checking out.

I’ve had plenty of guests that were also hosts and it was always kind of extra fun because we had something in common. I’ll admit to being intimidated sometimes but it’s worked out totally fine, they even tell me that they are going to “steal” some ideas from my units. However, I just had to leave a poor review for a host and I don’t doubt that he may blame it on me being a host but that’s just because he is blaming whoever he can other than himself.


I only used Airbnb as a guest 2 times before I became a host. I don’t think I’ve changed much. I suppose I do try extra hard to make sure I leave everything in good condition because I don’t want them thinking “hosts aren’t good guests.” I also don’t want to make my hosts nervous because some of them don’t have as many reviews or ratings as I do. Not many hosts can do what I do and I’m not going to hold that against them, but they have no way of knowing that. I can’t really think of any legit way to put them at ease other than if they take the time to read the reviews I’ve left for other hosts.


It’s not just

Never understood that one, we’ve had a fair few hosts from various platforms stay as guests and never had an issue.

With a few of them we’ve had a good laugh over a drink, either on the patio or in the tabanco over the road, about hosting, guests and all the related shit that comes with this job.

Maybe it’s the Oloroso factor :wine_glass:




I saw that post! It sounded like it was a needed head-check.


One of my worst guests was another host.
Booked for 1 but wanted to bring 5.
Wanted to cancel, didn’t like my strict cancellation policy.
I upgraded her to my 3 bed 2 bath at no extra cost so she would be comfortable
Left me 3 stars and a rant of a review that I didn’t trust her :flushed:
She no longer hosts…….


I think issues with cleanliness as well as non-functional items/equipment annoy me more than before. If I had the opportunity, I would let the host know in private feedback.

To be clear I have never stayed as an Airbnb guest even though I’ve stayed in several places that were offered on Airbnb. We booked them through VRBO or Booking-dot-com because they were less expensive on those platforms (which is telling, isn’t it?).

I was a guest before I was a host. I used those experiences to influence how I set my place up, described it, and communicated. Now that I’ve been a host a long time I am probably more apt to empathize with the host if something uncontrollable happens.

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Same with us, @Christine_Shirtcliff. Like you, we learned something about what to do and what not to do as hosts from being guests.

I remember that the first place we stayed had a bed loaded with throw pillows—and nowhere to put them but on the floor. Also, the bathroom had multiple towels crowded onto every rod—like five or six. I wasn’t entirely sure that they were all clean.

On the bright side, the host was very welcoming. She made us a wonderful breakfast in her country kitchen, and we had a lovely time talking with her.

From her Airbnb, we learned to keep the bed clear of decorative pillows and to make sure the towels were properly folded on the rod or on the counter. We also learned to interact happily with guests who were interested in that.


I’ve not yet travelled as a guest, but being a host would make me aware of how to word the message I would send to hosts when considering booking, being informative about myself and my intentions, as well as asking any questions about something that might be a deal-breaker for me.

For instance, while I’m pretty easygoing and adaptable, I can’t handle chemical smells (not allergic, they just disgust me), so would want to ascertain whether the host uses dryer sheets, air “fresheners” and such. And I wouldn’t ask that in a demanding way, just say that I can’t handle them and would the host be amenable to not using them for my stay, and if they aren’t, that’s fine, I understand, and would just look for another listing.

Having been a host, if there were issues during the stay, I would be well aware of how to handle that in a way that doesn’t cause unnecessary or unfair grief for the host. If it were an issue I felt they could and should correct for my stay, I’d give them an opportunity to correct it.

If it were something that was obviously nothing the host could do anything about at that point, like that they had been inaccurate in their description, or the basic maintenance was obviously not being done, I would cancel immediately and leave, or address it in the review or in private messaging with the host, depending on the issues and circumstances.

And when it came to the review, of course I would know how my ratings would affect the host, and also not to report a host or listing to Airbnb unless it was my intention to get them shut down because they should never be hosting.

I didn’t change at all, but I’ve always been picky when checking listings, in part because of my allergies.

I kept getting new hosts on my last (Nov 2019) trip, except for one in Eugene OR.

I should think that new hosts, unless they are just totally clueless and thought it would be easy money, might be quite nice to book with. They would likely be eager to please, and a bit nervous, and I would enjoy helping them to relax and realize they don’t need to bend over backwards just to make sure I wouldn’t give them a bad review.

And I’ve found that there is something quite satisfying about being able to leave that first review for a newbie guest, as long as you can write one that is deservedly good. So I would enjoy doing that for a newbie host, too.

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One of our favorite stays was in Eugene!

This seems to be a common theme. I’ve hosted 4 other hosts, as I recall, and they were all really nice guests. But they all happened to be home-share hosts, like me, which I think could make a big difference. You have to be fairly easygoing and tolerant to be a successsful home-share host, so maybe they make better guests than some of these entire home hosts.

But it still is mind-boggling to me that any host would try to sneak in extra people or pets, or treat a place or another host disrespectfully. Surely they would be upset if a guest did that to them?

I guess the error is in expecting other hosts to be any different from the general population. There’s respectful and non-respectful ones, those who are considerate of others, and those who think the rules don’t apply to them. It’s no different from assuming all hosts would present just as clean a space as we provide, when in fact, many of them don’t.

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One thing that I guess has changed is that I’d really rather just check in without interacting with the host. And don’t get me wrong, every time we meet the hosts and chat around, it’s been great fun! However, I just don’t find it is the best use of my time. The minutes are so precious when traveling and if you’re jabbering around during those precious minutes with someone you’ll NEVER see again, it’s just not the best for me at this stage of my life.

Regarding people identifying themselves as “hosts” that travel with us? The one thing I’ve noticed is people thinking they are hosts, but they’re really not. “We are fellow hosts” is in the message thread. A few clicks later and their profile has 1 shared-room listing with low rez flip-phone images, 9 total reviews spread over 2 years, and their last guest stayed back in 2018. My wife is like, “Another guest that thinks their a host!” Hosting these guests? These folks always seem to be as decent as anyone.

It’s just a little disappointing because we’d like to meet more hosts! We don’t seem to see many out there (at least not on the profiles that book with us). And what’s interesting is that goes for guests too! We’ll get the “we are extremely seasoned Airbnb travelers” blurb from some guests. And you look at their profile and they’ve stayed at 3 places total, all in one state, etc. Oh well. . .

Congratulations, I think you may just have won the most arrogant, judgemental and condescending post of the year award. Shared jointly with your wife for her comment.

Hosts pause listings or take a break from hosting for a variety of reasons, it doesn’t make them any less a host than you are.

This forum has a broad range of posters, the vast majority are hosts and some of them haven’t hosted for getting on for two years now. Those who aren’t currently hosting are almost exclusively in home hosts, do it because they like doing it and have paused for valid reasons.

Does that make them any less a host than you are? Nope.

Could you maybe even learn something from them? Most definitely.

They very well may be “seasoned Airbnb travelers [sic]” as guests travelling as part of a group, or with a partner do not have reviews on their own accounts. In addition, guests (and occasionally hosts) create new accounts for a variety of reasons, quite often due to being unable to access their original account due to issues with Airbnb and its poor support.



I’ve stayed as a guest quite a few times and never had the dryer sheet experience until October, terrible. I put towels, pillows, etc on a small porch trying to get rid of the smell.

I’m going on another trip and booked another on Air not thinking about dryer sheets. When I realized I needed to know, I sent a message asking if they used them and if they did would they please not for me. Host said they didn’t use them, problem solved.

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I guess that’s how guests who ignore your messages feel. It’s just not the best use of their time to inform you of their ETA, ask how to work something instead of breaking it, or answer a check-in message asking if all is well.

They just want to IB, show up, stay and leave without having anything to do with you. So I trust you’re okay with that.

I would have missed out on connecting with some awesome people and experiences in life if my vacation time was so tightly scheduled that stopping to talk to someone for a few minutes was annoying to me.


I may have already shared here that my first stay as an AirBnb guest was really bad in every way: our room was not the one in the photos, it was very far from town, but described as an “easy walk” (yeah: down a steep, windy, busy parkway over 2 miles each way).

I specifically asked if the house was quiet after 10 pm, and was assured it was, yet noisy guests checked into the room next door after midnight, then showered and chatted in & out of the bathroom which was conveniently located between the rooms.

It was soooo cold with only a microfiber blanket (the kind that feel almost greasy?) and no extras provided. Didn’t want to bother the host after 10 pm, “good” guest that I am.

The funniest part was that the water pipes ran right next to and behind the head of the bed (converted garage?) clanking - was there air in them or something? - grinding and groaning, which gave us an attack of the giggles that warmed us up a bit.

$100 for this miserable night in lovely Santa Barbara. I didn’t review her, as I was NEVER going to use AirBnb again! Had to eat my words when my son moved to Honolulu and my favorite hotel remodeled and doubled their prices. :grinning_face_with_smiling_eyes:

From this experience I learned that, to aspire to Superhost, one must first refrain from torturing guests…

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