Nosey Guests sometimes

Sometimes I find you get nosey guests, who asks all sorts of innapropiate questions in a “passive aggressive manner” it’s really annoying, and a lot of subtle suggestive questions/and reasoning.
And most of them are about money(but subtle stuff e.g. how long have you lived here for/ or that job must be good money/or is there a lot of work in your industry/or personal stuff like do you like to go out a lot or are you a quiet retiring type who stays home alot, trying to assess your financial status etc, and your personal life. It’s annoying and you get suspicious of the guests that they might steal something before they leave or if you out. Airbnb has had guests who’ve stolen. There was one incident in USA where a guest stole some jewellery, she was charged and sent to jail. But guests are not always what they seem. At the start your happy with them but over time you can’t wait for that check-out date.
It’s so annoying when all you want to say to them if f** off but you keep up the “facade” of pleasantries and nervously try and answer politely when you naturally want them to buzz off. Some guest really test your boundaries.

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Honestly, those questions seem like small talk rather than intrusive or “scoping out the joint.”


Someone seems to have his Paranoia dialed up! Those are all questions which people of the world ask each other when they meet – not a script for a crime syndicate to pillage your few puny possessions.

Anything you don’t want to reveal can simply be ignored, lied about, or you can simply say “I don’t feel comfortable answering that”. However that last solution will soon get you tagged as “uncommunicative”, “stuffy” or “paranoid”.


Those questions are perfectly normal when strangers are in conversation and like Ken, I think it’s your own paranoia creeping in.

As for someone stealing jewellery from a host, what on earth was the jewellery doing there? That’s bonkers.

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Let’s not blame the host that some scum bag stole from her. I live in my ABB and simply can’t lock all my Le Cruset pots up, stereo speakers, jewelry and art, I can’t even lock my room as I have antique doors which I can’t modify. There has to some trust because if I locked everything valuable in my filing cabinet, most of the house would be a locked filing cabinet he he.

I’m glad the thief went to jail, through no fault of the host.

No it’s not normal well in my view anyway to ask a “Host” personal stuff about there finances. I’ve had guests ask how much did you pay for your home. It’s none of there business how much I paid for it, and same applies to Ken. I’ve never asked a guest how much did they pay for there home. And if you both think it’s normal for guests to ask stuff like or say stuff like “you not going out today” when there in your home. It’s none of there business, I’m the boss man it’s my house. And the guests who have asked these sort of questions I’ve found to be the most sneaky in general, e.g. they’ve lied about stuff the most. One sneaky guest who asked these type of questions, also lied at the booking stage(he said it was a booking for him and his girlfriend, but arrived with his sister, it’s a no smoker policy but the sister then was a smoker and asked if she could smoke on the balcony- I can tell you that was an akward chat at the state of tour when I said we have a son smoker policy didn’t you read the Ad but anyways. No some guests are sneaky well in my view anyway. Most are not, but some are sneaky.


Well exactly. And the only reason she did go to jail was coz the host put secret camera’s in the house as she didn’t trust the guest who surprisingly was a woman theif. The camera evidence was used against her. Yes it was probably an invasion of privacy but she put the secret camera in the living room coz she felt uneasy about the guest during her stay.
Agree the Host should not have to be a full-time security guard, and anyone who obeys the law even if they see a “diamond necklace” they have no right to steal it from the host under any circumstances.

Steve, you really need to perk up your people skills. I’m happy to answer that question because where’s the harm in it? ‘$145 K ten years ago’. Why on earth should that be a secret? If they really wanted to know for sneaky reasons they could look it up on the local property appraiser site after all. It’s public information when all’s said and done.

‘Why do you ask?’
‘Go on, take a guess.’
‘Why? Do you want to make me an offer for it?’
‘Tell me how much you paid for yours and I’ll tell you if mine cost more or less’.

Just be jokey and stop being so suspicious of people.


You might be cool with it Jaquo being asked, but well I’m not. People can check title records, but not everyone knows about that. I only knew such a thing existed 3 years ago. And many of my guests earn a lot less than what you earned 10 years ago. I would feel akward being jokey about such stuff when i’m asked financial questions I’m usually caught off guard, i sort of be honest or sort of lie or play it down or a nervous laugh. It’s an akward one. People skills I’ve learnt a bit as I go on in this airbnb stuff.
Like how to deal with tough questions or requests. When I first started it, I felt akward about saying “NO” to certain requests e.g. can we pick up luggage and com back later in the day before our flight. Now I have a strict rule, no luggage allowed to be left check-out time is strict e.g. 10am means 10am and you must take everything with you. And I inform my guests there’s “PAID-Lugguage” service at the Airport, with lockers. I’m not a luggage locker service and I don’t have give up my free time for guests once they’ve checked out. Before I used to allow it, and let them take the key after check out and when they come back they just take luggage and drop key. But No not anymore.
When I first started(early bookings) a guest caught me off-guard by asking if he could leave bag at my place for 5 days and when he gets back to my home city could he pick it up(so i was a 5 day locker service for him). So yep those days are gone, i allow no early check-in of bags and check-out means check out(no leave bag and come back later in day before your evening flight). Now I’m relaxed dealing with that objection, some guests do test boundaries more than others, but that’s the way it goes people a are different. Being an Airbnb host is like being a human resource manager or man manager. Im not the best man manager not the worst either but resolving conflict with guests seems a big part of being a host.

But Steve, that’s my point. Why is it that you have conflicts with guests? I realise that I’ve been doing this for much longer than you have but conflict is something I don’t remember ever experiencing. Is it possible that there are some aspects of your attitude that create these conflicts? Just asking.

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Sometimes I have akward conflict or chats when I ask guests about house rules that there breaking
1)House rules I make about noise. The chats get a big akward, and I get annoyed when some guests either through disrespect or contempt of me don’t obey my noise rules even after I have told them to be more quiet e.g. slamming the doors. 2)An awkwardness there used to be if I would let or not allow guests leave there bags(that I’v improved now I have a policy about that, No leaving bags after check-out)
So my biggest conflict has been about when guest break my noise rules/ and also when they have lied by being smokers(when my ad says NO Smokers)

Hi Steve,

It’s great that you’ve identified the main problems. That way, you can deal with them in advance. Get into conversation with your forthcoming guests on the Airbnb message platform. If they are just enquiring say something like:

Hi there! We’d love to accommodate you for those dates. I’d just like to make you aware of the important rules of the house before you book. We have quiet hours between 10 pm and 8 am and it’s a beautifully quiet location so please bear in mind that excessive noise is not acceptable at any time. Note too that we cannot look after your luggage before or after your stay. You’ll find public storage facilities at xxxxx. The final important point is that there is to be no smoking whatsoever on the premises. We prefer to host non-smokers but smokers will need to go to xxxxx if they wish to smoke during their stay. I hope these are acceptable to you. We look forward to meeting you!

Then if the guest books send a further message reiterating these important rules a few days before arrival:

Hi guys!
I look forward to meeting you on Saturday. I just want to remind you of … etc.

This helps your guests and their expectations.


Hi Jacquo, thanks heaps for that. Wow that put things into well structured format. I will use some of those points in how i word or get my message across to my guests. Your format is friendly and welcoming but it’s also subtly firm and makes it clear there are clear rules that must be obeyed by guests(that your home is there for them to have fun, but equally your home is not there to be trashed like it’s a “frat party” or on" spring break". I’ll use some of those tips thanks heaps jacquo :slight_smile:


I agree with @jaquo, and related tips/advice.

Also, it’s important to remember that different people absorb information different ways. Many people can remember what they read, but others don’t because they learn/remember things better if they hear the information. So it’s also good to go through the House Rules on check-in if you do a personal greeting.

Most guests don’t want any drama. They’re there for holiday or to visit family, and so they don’t want conflict either. However, we’ve all been taught that if you’re not sure about something then to ask, and others the “don’t ask, don’t get” culture is prevalent. Questions aren’t meant to offend normally.

We interact with people who don’t have the same things we have all the time. Some have more or less. Most people don’t give this a second thought because it’s just a fact of life rather than something personal against them.

If you need any more help dealing with the conflict or other issues, please come back to this forum and you’ll get assistance. :slight_smile:


I agree these questions are nosy, but some people seem to have no problem asking them! If I feel like answering I will, but if I don’t I’ll just laugh and immediately change the subject. They soon get the message!

I love the guests that ask me how much rent I pay, do I have a husband (do you see him? Was he mentioned in my profile given I live here???), why did you break up, why don’t you eat meat??? blah blah blah sometimes I just say he’s dead to shut them up


.and a lot of hosts aren’t what they seem.
False advertising. Not understanding that you’re being paid to provide a service. Blaming guests for things that are the hosts fault.

As a guest, today, January 1st which is not only a sunday, but an observed us holiday, my host accused me of invading her privacy for bringing in her mail from the mailbox.

1st off. I didn’t do so. Being a former postal worker. It’s illegal to do so, and I would have never consider even checking my own mail on a Sunday holiday.

2nd off. Her brother had been here today doing all sort of errands… such as taking out garbage (two days before it’s supposed to go out) and… checking the mail…

Sorry but what’s that got to do with this topic?

@Dru_Nei 1. You’re off topic 2. Are you even a host??? I’ve never seen you on here before & so far every post I’ve read is you trolling and insulting hosts. Seriously, get a life :zzz:


Thanks Ash953 lots of good points you make. Yep, conflict resolution is a big part of being an Airbnb Host I find. Small things can escalate into bigger things. Good points with more or less, jealousy/envy natural human emotions that do arise between host/and guest sometimes.