I like that, perfect. Your mention of 24 hours, reminds me of how there is usually a wise adage in most cultures, which in essence says always wait 24 hours to formulate a response, it will usually turn out to be the wisest approach.
But why? Why do they deserve a sugar coat, or a positive stroke before you get to the bad stuff?
One time one host wrote, āthe guest did not respect the check out timeā and it gave me pause, but was not enough to not take them since their other reviews were so glowing.
Say exactly what they did. Of course you want to save the really really bad reviews for the bad guests. Iāve only written two bad reviews in all my years of hosting, and should have written one moreā¦
Guests donāt hesitate to crack us. Sometimes over nothing or something trivial. Why go out of our way to avoid saying what the guest did. ??
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I did what I thought was best. It think this sends a clear message.
āMy in-person interaction with Sarah and her boyfriend was fine and they left their space in good order. Unfortunately, they poorly planned and mis-communicated their arrival time the first night, and I stayed up until the middle of the night waiting for them as their arrival time kept changing. Finally, they never showed up the first night and stayed with me only one night.ā
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Superbly worded. You gave them credit for their good points and did mentioned their main shortcoming (totally inconsiderate of time) with finesse. Most importantly, you came across as who you really are, a kind-hearted person.
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Mearns, you know I love you but we have a difference of opinion here. 
. I donāt see the need to give them anything positive. Isnāt the fact that they were ok in person get completely negated by their terribly rude behavior the night before? A bad review is a bad review. No one will ever rent to these guests. I would have left off the first lines and just said the rest. Too bad. They should have had some consideration for their poor host who stressed the entire night about their arrival. That is a bad bad guest.
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Think about it k, this is a āvery young coupleā, kids, who at times do really stupid, inconsiderate things, and yes can be quite infuriating. Even good people do come in 10 parts; 8 might be great, 2 may be outright awful. These two youngsters are not a finished product, they are learning.
What really exacerbated the situation was the fact @mountaingen doesnāt have a ālet yourself inā set up, which many hosts do, for this exact situation, and that would have made the stupidity of these two young flakes a moot point. Perhaps she will find it useful, if practical and willing, to do implement such a setup for the future, or at the very least be doubly beware of āyoung kidsā, or have a strict maximum check-in time.
@mountaingen didnāt categorize the guests, but stated only the facts, for the benefit of future hosts, now it is up to them to use the information as they see fit. Just like with the media, I donāt need a reporter to tell me what to think, just give me the facts, which is exactly what she did.
Oftentimes, we learn more when we stumble on differences in thinking, than when we are in constant agreement. 
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But for some hosts, self check in isnāt feasible and she should not be punished because she doesnāt have it. Even though I could easily allow self check in, I donāt. I want to meet them when they get here, get their tax and waiver, make sure they arenāt arriving with more guests than two. This is my right as a host. I donāt care if itās 2 in the morning (yes, I have had guests arrive that late) I want to meet them.
I was their age once and I never acted like that. Itās partly why I require guests to be at least 25. If I got a bad review like this, it would not help me to have a couple of compliments first. Thatās patronizing.
Good policy, lessens the likelihood of these type of situations. I think I am adopting it myself.
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Itās a rule for me, too. I once had an 18 year-old try to book for him and six of his friends for over Halloween weekend (my max is 5 guests). Thatās when I made the 25 or older rule. (can you imagine what those 18-year olds would have done to my place?!)
Are you two putting that in your rule book? I like that policy. I had one group of 20-21 years old, holy moly. They threw all the wicker chairs into the saltwater to sit on and have beers, etc, etc, etc, etc!
@Mearns Yes, it is in my list of rules ā Person making the booking must be at least 25 years old. Of course, if that 25 year old is trying to book for a group of non-related 20-somethings, I decline. Not worth it ā Iāve learned the hard way.
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Two times I have had < 25 years old, one the āwickerā group the other had me very worried, called/texted no answer, I went out late at night to the island to check on them, stone-cold drunk/high. They didnāt remember I even visited them. Who needs this.
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Thanks Mearns, I appreciate the kind words.
I once hosted two brothers on their first solo getaway (without mom/dad), they were 19 and 18. Showed up here with real pastries from NYC as a gift. They were extremely considerate, respectful, and interesting. They thanked me profusely for allowing them to stay, realizing that their ages would prevent them from staying elsewhere. They said they liked the ABB experience, they had only been to hotels with mom/dad. When I got home from work the day they left, they had picked some wildflowers for me and left them on the kitchen table, left me a nice note and a drawing of the outside of my house.
Some young people are absolutely delightful.
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Stereotypes suck but Iām not immune to falling victim to their allure. For me, IB is a way to remove one of the temptations to use them.
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Some of my very very best guests have been under 25, after I was convinced by them to make an exception. Same thing, courteous and politeā¦ Way less demanding than the over 50- 60 crowd.
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Admittedly, the other day I did run into a group of college aged kids, they were displaying really obnoxious behavior, but perhaps it was the mob mentality. I guess, just like anything, itās a crap shoot!
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Sorry Mearns. I disagree with your comment about faulting @mountaingen for not have a ālet yourself inā set up. Even hotels donāt leave you the key to get in without meeting someone at the front desk to checking-in - why should a host be required to do that? I am going to personalize this now. These people are guests in my home. I donāt have a separate cottage or apartment with a separate entrance, nor a cookie-cutter layout that would be easy to figure out - like a hotel room. As a host, I feel that it is my responsibility to welcome them and show them around the house and to their room. Itās not as simple as āhereās your key - you figure out the rest.ā
I do agree, that these are young kids that need to mature a bit. As a host, I think it is important to read and write a well rounded review, with both the plusses and minuses, thus leaving it up to the next host what they will put up with and what they wonāt.
This is what I said: "Perhaps she will find it useful, if practical and willing, to do implement such a setup for the futureā¦"
I am not faulting her, just pointing out that IF such a set up can be practically implemented (and she is willing) it may be a Godsend, as others have discovered. Even some that at first werenāt too keen on the idea. She said she rather meet all guests personally, so thatās that. I do too.
It was a suggestion to at least entertain the idea.
Addendum: Because they are young kids, I personally would have cut them a bit of a break, but definitely do cover with them the folly of their ways. I think of my own son, a really great kid, but does some really stupid things at times. If they were older, that would have been another matter.
I do have a lockbox, but I just had a weird feeling about them from the start. I try not to use it if possible, plus I like to greet my guests. The room is in my house, not a separate location. Its a small house, so I think its pretty normal to want to be here for me. This said, I have had a couple people with whom I set the lockbox. It depends.
As for the age, up to know younger renters have been my least favorite guests personally. I work with college students, so maybe it has to do with thatā¦ it just seems like they are lacking maturity. Simple things like whipping the kitchen counter after cooking, or not cleaning their dishes, being more noisy, etc. Nothing huge, I just see a difference.
In the end, I realize that everyone has different experiences.
Got a great guest right now! 