Issue with Shared Space and Patio Area

I’m fairly new to using Airbnb and not sure how I should handle the shared space in my place. I live in a 2 bedroom, 1 bathroom place and rent out the spare bedroom. They have access to my whole home with the exception of my private bedroom. I have a pretty baller patio, especially for Chicago and highlight that in my listing. I had a guest staying with me for the week and I had some a housewarming BBQ party yesterday in the patio and the guests were pretty upset about it. I told them after they checked in that I was going to have 10-20 friends over in the patio space from about 2-8pm. They intended on using my patio and having their entire family (about 8 people) over to BBQ that day. I do state no parties or events in my listing. I welcomed the guests (a couple in their 60s) to stay and hang out with us, but of course knew they wouldn’t do that. Am I being out of line having people over when guests are there? They wanted a refund of a day for the inconvenience and I told them I would consider it. I want to utilize my patio space and have some friends over to enjoy the area. We aren’t out of line with loud music and beer pong and all.

Also, they complained I should never be in the living room/kitchen and they intended on having that space entirely for themselves. I watch tv from 8-10pm most nights while eating dinner and around the house. I think that’s very out of line to expect me to not use my tv or be in the kitchen if I’m not cooking. Am I wrong?

Is your place listed on air bnb as private room?

Yes. It is listed as a private room.

Would you be willing to share the url of the listing?

Well, the headline is “Private Patio.”

I suppose it is necessary in some way to define the users of the various spaces. Their bedroom is private. The rest is shared. Let them know that in the most tactful way possible.

It’s a shared area. They should know that theres a posibility of the places having an undisclosed number of rooms. So should expect other people. Plus the landlord (you) lives there. It’s not a hotel or renting a whole house. So you are in the right. You can’t put your life and social things on hold.

Thats what I think.


In Chicago, it’s generally assumed that size of space is for the entire condo association and not just my unit. Since it is a shared room, I probably need to state it in another way that I have friends and they enjoy the patio as much as me haha.

I would take the word “private” out of the part about the patio. Maybe spell out a little more in the listing that you will be around.

I think they were out of line not expecting you to use the kitchen or living room. Did they think you don’t eat?

As for the party…maybe try to have those on days you don’t have guests. It sounds a bit awkward staying in a house where there is a party going on but you are not part of it.

Was this their first Airbnb experience?

I agree, guests can think they have the private room and the private patio (title private patio)

For the party, as it was finishing early I don’t think it should be a problem.

They had 1 experience before in a shared room for a week and their host was never around and out of town part of the time. I think they expected a typical host to never be around.

In Chicago, the weather can be pretty fickle so it’s super hard to plan something out more than a few day’s ahead and I’m pretty much only having people over on a Saturday or Sunday afternoon. Also I’m lucky and have about 80% booking rate in the past 4 months and most weekends for the next 2 months are already booked.

Most guests I’ve had are in their 20-30s and the one other time i had a party, they happily joined in and had beers with us. Since it’s an older couple (and I have more older couples in the next couple weeks), I might need to manage the expectations and scenarios better.

I also rent out my spare room but they have their own bathroom. I expect, and expect guests to expect, that my use of my home takes precedence over their use of my home, especially for the price. Mine is under $40 but I think yours is reasonably priced and looks like a nice place. But it only takes one person misunderstanding to make you have to add more details and clarifications to your listing. Since you say no parties or events or other guests then I don’t know why they thought they could have their family over. I wouldn’t refund them but you’ll probably get a bad review so make sure your review also makes clear that they are mad because they were deprived of an opportunity to violate house rules.

In your listing make it clear that they have a private room and the rest of the house and patio is shared with you. Next time you have guests and a big party planned let them know when they make the reservation request.


Hi datrip1,

Your place looks lovely. The patio looks so nice. I think there is some blame on both sides. Your listing title says Private Patio. In the listing you clarify that you mean that the patio is exclusive to your unit. As guests rarely read the listing I can see that your guests might have thought that the patio was for their exclusive use. I would not hesitate to have a friend or two over for a meal while I was hosting, but I would ask the guests in advance of accepting their reservation if they would be comfortable with me having a larger party. I can see how a guest would not think of having family over for barbecue as a party or event. If you don’t want your guests to have guests you need to add that to your house rules. Your guests are ridiculous, mean spirited and churlish in telling you that they want exclusive use of your kitchen and living room.


Thanks for all the positive comments on my place!

In general, I don’t mind if my guests have a couple people over. Especially if they bring hot female friends haha. I told this couple they could even use my patio space with their family any other day and time and I’m completely ok with it. They knew this 3 days ahead of time. I just don’t want to feel I can’t live in my home and utilize my space. I think going forward I’ll remove the “Private” patio part and mention to guests at least 3 days ahead if I’m having a larger party. I would think if there’s 5 or less people over is standard and doesn’t need to be mentioned.

You have a lovely place. However, you need to clarify your listing. I would not offer the use of my kitchen and be very clear that they are welcome to share the living space and patio with me. I would also make it clear that guests can not have visitors. Your generosity in your description could be misleading. You live there, keep some restrictions on your guests. You need to discourage guests from thinking they can take over. Offer less and when you have nice guests you can bend the rules on a case by case basis. It’s a private bedroom not a whole apartment. And for your price in Chicago it’s a steal.

I wouldn’t expect to bring 8 people over to an Airnbnb without explicit permission from the host. I’d also want to make sure the place was equipped to handle cooking for that many. Not all are.

Maybe you can say something like “The patio is only shared with me. Occasionally I have a few friends over for a mellow get-together, never late at night. You are welcome to join us.”

Use the word shared a lot in the listing…shared kitchen and living room.


I think your guests are way way way out of line…especially thinking they could invite 8 family members over for a meal. Yes 8 family member is a party / event. And they are out of line expecting you to curtail your life, when they are renting a room. You own the property and you have the right to have friends over and hold a be. They are also out of line complaining that you should never be in the living room/kitchen and that they intended on having that space entirely for themselves. They have no idea proper behavior in a shared airbnb.
That being said…please change your headline and take away that “private Patio”. How about “Gorgeous Patio”…and then make it clear in your listing that they share the use of the Patio with you.


No no no. No parties. No 5 people. No. It just doesn’t work. They get loud; they annoy the neighbors; they leave a mess. NO. They rented a room and they get to share your patio. That is all. You just found out how guests will push limits. Don’t go there. No.


Agree… Hot chicks or not. Take it from those of us who have done this a few years… Allowing your guests to bring persons unknown to you into your home is asking for trouble. They have NO accountability to you, like your guests do. I, like you, wanted my guests to think I was chill and would welcome their friends. Well I got taken advantage of! They had a big party and disrespected me, my neighbors and my property. There is NO benefit to you in allowing guests to do this. … Also agree with the others here… If you change the title of this listing and clarify the one ambiguous sentence you will have far less trouble or misunderstandings.