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Guests had a party. Airbnb won't do anything until I give them the opportunity to modify their behaviour

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Is there a reason you didn’t feel able to approach them as the situation was unfolding? You could, for example, have approached the guests at 10.30 and reminded them your house rules don’t allow overnight guests. Or you could have approached them earlier and said something along the lines of: additional guests not allowed, smoking etc

Hosting can sometimes be like having children. The annoying thing is you’re dealing with adults so you don’t expect to have to remind adults of the rules, and it’s easy to initially feel awkward about these conversations. Generally in my experience face to face (said in a really calm friendly manner) always goes down fine. Hey x, how’s everything going? I’m really pleased you’re enjoying your stay, I just wanted to talk about having guests over as you may have missed it in the house rules. Normally they’re not allowed etc etc. And for new guests, right off the bat when you’re doing the tour remind them of your most important house rules.

If you’re feeling like you’d like to avoid a confrontation you could send a message but it always comes across a bit passive aggressive when done that way. Plus they’re unlikely to see it until well after the fact.

Really, you’re going to need to be more proactive in enforcing your rules and getting comfortable with setting boundaries with your guests. It’s important you do so, so you feel in control and happy with what’s happening under your roof.

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I don’t think this is a justifiable reason for not approaching the situation before it got out of hand. Had the weight lifters done anything to suggest that they would treat you with anything less than respect? Are you current guests weightlifters too as you’ve also stated concerns with them … is there a reason you can’t reiterate the ground rules with your current guests ?

Asking people if they read the house rules isn’t really the best way to be be sure people have ingested what you said. Far better to repeat it verbally and ask if they have questions. And far better, when you see your rules being broken that you raise it immediately. It would have saved you 4am calls to Airbnb.

If you feel your small stature and gender prevents you from engaging properly with some guests you might want to consider only advertising to females.

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Agree on the drugs- I’d missed that in your post. The rest I still think you needed to approach them directly. Had something happened you would have had strong grounds to get them removed immediately. Further you do need to feel safe in your home; if you don’t feel able to take certain groups to task (e.g. Men) then I’d say you should consider not hosting them as your safety is paramount.

Were Airbnb clear on the drugs issue I though they had a hard line on substance abuse ?

I am sorry to hear this. This is the same thing Airbnb told me. I asked hypothetically if I would get paid out if a guest brought too many people without permission.

Air said that it doesn’t matter if they break your rules and they agreed to them. You have to give them a chance to rectifiy the situation. So basically if I had a family with kids who brought more than my max to stay, Air expects that I will ask them to rent another house too, or an extra hotel room. So then I would have an angry family staying in the home (because they were caught) and who knows what they might do in it for a week. Air has no more rules at all. Everything with them is a mirage. House rules are meaningless to Air reps.

As far as what I would do with these guests…just keep laying down the law. I’m not sure your question of calling Air to have the guests removed. Air can call them and ask them to leave, but to me that is more awkward then asking them to leave myself.

I don’t know…I hear a lot of people on this forum suggest to call Air and have them relocate your guests. I just don’t see myself having some twenty year old kid call my guest (who is in the room next door) and asking them to leave. I just don’t see that ending nice and peacefully. But if that’s what is necessary to get paid out…then go for it.

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Glad you’re confirming it was nothing to do with them being weightlifters or your small stature. I’d understood that to be the reason you felt you couldn’t talk to them!

I don’t really know if there’s much else to say; Airbnb should support you but you do also need to have a conversation with your guests about broken house rules. It doesn’t need to be a long chat but the conversation does need to be had…

Will be interested to see what others contribute. Good luck with your future hosting!

Yes, I would guess they were uncomfortable. I think this is an awful scenario.

I don’t think it’s so much that rules are a mirage, more that you have to be seen to be fair.

I think of it as a similar situation to you having done something wrong at work. Did it happen because you didn’t know better or because you were willfully breaking the rules ? Can’t be sure so a conversation has to be had and the rules spelled out.

The one situation where this shouldn’t apply is gross misconduct: I would put taking drugs/theft/violence in this category and do think Airbnb should act appropriately if these serious infingements happen. There’s no ‘oh sorry I didn’t know’ in those situations it’s just black or white …

Walk into their space. Loudly announce that the party is OVER and that you’ve called the police (which you should have done. Those “uninvited guests” make their actions a “Home Invasion”.

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Yep. And to me it is fair to be paid out and have your guests removed for breaking house rules of inviting other guests, smoking, being loud after 10, etc. What is the purpose of having the guest “click to agree” to the house rules if they have not read them?

You know, I know, and Air knows that guests will just click that box. So yes, I do believe it is all a mirage, esp. because once the guest breaks the rules Air often times does nothing about it.

I know exactly how breaking an over occupancy rule would play out at my offsite rental. Maximum is 6 guests - family of 4 adults with 4 children show up. I tell guest that they have gone over occupancy and only 6 guests can stay. Parents are pissed because they don’t want one parent and a child to stay in a hotel. They decide they will call Air and stage that the place is not as advertised. Or they call Air to complain and Air comes up with some “mysterious” reason of why my payment isn’t being processed.

And if the family actually did stay and also rent a hotel. You better believe I would get a scathing negative review.

In the end the host is the one who loses for enforcing their house rules.

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Ok, I’m probably not going to be popular for this view but you really need to step up @monstreux . Airbnb is simply a platform, a broker. YOU are the one that is responsible for what happens on YOUR property. Why do you imagine that Air is responsible for your inability to manage tenants? As soon as that party started and people were smoking you should have rolled your sleeves up and done your job as a host/landlord. Why go crying to Airbnb? What the hell did you expect them to do??

I make no apologies for being harsh. This is a core problem - hosts who have no idea what they’re doing and think that “Momma” will sort everything out for them. Air needs to take responsibility too, of course, for promoting the idea that hosting is an easy, lovely, airy-fairy thing to do. But honestly, hosts like this are probably one of the reasons that they’ve cut back on customer support. For goodness sake, if you can’t manage guests then don’t host. It’s that simple. Many of you on here say “call them” when it’s the most trivial thing that you could sort out yourself. And then you complain that you can’t get through to them! Guess what? They’re all busy answering stupid questions.

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I’m not clear why you felt you couldn’t approach them? It seems to be because they are weightlifters. I don’t understand that. You think only big people are dangerous? That’s a mistake, I think. Anyone can be dangerous, no matter their size. But ok, if you really think you were in danger, you should have called the police. It’s still not clear why you expected Air to cancel the booking and re-house them in the middle of the night, though. How could they realistically do that?

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Actually “Momma” wants to be in the center of everything. If “momma” wasn’t holding payouts over hosts’ heads, then hosts would have no reason to call them.

If Air actually paid hosts out and always allowed them to keep all the money when a guest is disregarding the house rules…I think most hosts wouldn’t even call them. But they have to call to get their side of the story in, before the guest makes up a lie and says host locked them out for no reason. Air is the one who encourages hosts to keep all messaging on the platform. Air wants hosts to think they can’t do anything without them. Air likes it that way, and they have been successful keeping hosts fearful of taking any bookings outside of their system.

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