Do guests see what you click for recommendation?

1

When you go to review a guest, the first thing that pops up is asking if you would recommend them or not. Thumbs up or thumbs down.

Do your guests see your response or just the written review?

I feel badly about leaving a negative review, and my last guest didn’t really do anything that would merit making him seem a bad guest to most, he just made me uncomfortable as a single woman sharing the house with him.

~What happened below that prompts my asking~

Guest introduction went well enough. He seemed a little awkward but friendly and polite. I showed him the house, answered all his questions, including some small talk, told him to let me know if he needed anything, all the usuals (I’ve been hosting for a year now). He was in town for work as a contractor at a prominent local garden.

He cooked dinner for two his first night while I was working upstairs in my office, then called me down to eat (I hadn’t agreed to this or showed interest). I told him I wasn’t hungry and he insisted he’d made too much and I must try it. I thanked him and said I’d have a taste, indicating I’d take it back to my office, and he instead made a plate and set it on the table next to his with comments about whether or not my boyfriend would be comfortable with my dining with another man (I don’t think I ever mentioned my boyfriend to him). I didn’t want to be rude, so I ate a few bites and then said I really had to get back to work to excuse myself.

He proceeded to show more interest in me than I’d like (I’ve had chatty guests before, but none that gave this weird vibe). Thankfully he was in town for work and got up at 4AM and went to bed at 9PM, so for the next two nights of his stay, I just stayed away from the house for the most part until he went to bed, and locked my bedroom door. I apologized later for not having more time to speak with him as our schedules were so different, and let him know I hope he enjoyed his stay, etc.


As a single woman... I wish I'd have known this guy could be a bit overly interested in his hosts. His 3 reviews all said he was polite and clean, but were brief. For the first time in my year of hosting I clicked thumbs-down to the recommendation, but I left him a pleasant enough review. I stated he was friendly, clean, and quiet when maneuvering his early hours, and I said I got the feeling he wished we could spend more time together, but our conflicting schedules did not allow it. 

TL;DR I'm just curious whether or not he'll see I didn't recommend him to other hosts as I've never done that before. Sorry for the long post, but I thought some clarification as to why I hit thumbs-down might be merited.
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All they see is the review you leave. I’ve been in similar situation once. The guy wasn’t creepy he was just more interested in me than I wanted him to be. I guess I would say he was a bit needy.

This fellow just sounds like he was trying to be nice and he’d probably be a perfectly lovely guest for many hosts. I did tell Airbnb about my concerns just in case he was a creep.

Edit: I went to look up his reviews after my stay and one host in Oman in Dec. said " We are always very happy to give advice and welcome curious travelers, but ******'s requests began a month before he arrived, were very frequent, and personally, a little stressful for me." So it’s just this guy’s personality.

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Others will correct me if I am wrong but I don’t think he will see the thumbs down. He was hitting on you and you did not feel OK with it. You are entitled to your feelings. I think your review was a little soft. Instead of “conflicting schedules” you might have said, “I had no interest, I’m not doing this to meet men” or something. Might serve to discourage other guys who might think this is a dating App. Always go with your instincts.

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Thanks, KIKC. You’re probably right. I was leaning on the assumption that maybe our personalities clashed and he’d be perfectly alright in most other situations. Throughout our encounter I couldn’t totally tell if he was hitting on me or just one of those lonely guests that just want someone to talk to, if that makes sense. But it made me uncomfortable.

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That all sounds overly pushy. This person is a complete stranger, right? And in your own home, too!

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Needy is definitely the right word. I’d maybe throw in lonely. But I agree that I thought he’d likely be OK in other situations, just wasn’t the best match for me.

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7

100% a stranger! I made a point to avoid him after that encounter. I probably could have been more upfront that the sort of interaction he sought was unwelcome. Live and learn I guess.

8

It sounds like he didn’t mean anything bad by it. But some people are not very clueful about appropriate kinds of behavior. And yes, it sounds like he might have been lonely. Single men can look for companionship in all the wrong places…

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I would have locked my bedroom door with him. I find the single traveller do tend to want more interaction, have young children so great excuse to cut short long conversations. My hubby would sit and talk all night long , so i leave him to it.

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I wish you had left a better review than just the thumbs down. By better I mean honest.

“Xx guest was a little pushy and got personal with me in ways I found uncomfortable. I would not recommend him for these reasons.”

Seriously, does this loser think crap like this works with women? Did he think booking your home gave him an advantage to hit on you? I’m usually not wrong about these vibes. And I am sure you weren’t either. This was completely inappropriate for this guest to do.

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11

I realize this topic was discussed quite a while ago, but I came across it on a site search because I wanted to know if, in fact, a guest will see the thumbs down or up? I’m a little hesitant to leave a “down” with my present guest because I’m a little concerned about retaliation.

12

Sorry you had to endure this creepo. Unless there are no restaurants nearby, I am surprised for a 3 night stay that a single guest would opt to cook dinner in on his first night. But of course the reason was so he could spend time with his new female host - how creepy to call you down for dinner in your own house!

He knew he was overstepping boundaries by trying to manipulate you into eating dinner with him at the table. And then fishing around to see if you had a boyfriend…oh I don’t even need to get started on a creepy man rant. Good for you for at least avoiding him the rest of the time. Your vibes were correct.

13

I’ve been an air guest 4 times, as recently as May, and I’ve never seen a thumbs up or down.

14

Thanks for your input. Wow. That’s good to know. I always assumed the guest was going to see it. So the review–the verbiage–shows but not the thumbs? So if I give a thumbs down it means that it won’t go towards the “positively reviewed” count. Hmmmm. This might explain why sometimes I’ll see that a prospective guest has been an ABB member for a long time but there are no reviews?

Update on my present guy: His laundry, half of it anyway, is still on top of the machines. He got up around 11am; this is after his alarm starting going on and off since 8:30. He’s out of the house now. I blocked my calendar for the day he’s supposed to be leaving. I hope he’s not expecting to stay on. I’ll bring up the subject later tonight, IF I see him.

And that’s great that you use ABB when you travel. I’ve never done it but might try to toward the end of summer when I plan to do a little road trip up north.

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What!? Just the way you word that is so wishy washy! (no offense) He will NOT be staying on. If he asks you, you will say " sorry, not possible. I need you to check out on time. I have booked another guest into the room that evening."

Tell. Do not ASK the guest if it is OK if they leave now.
When I taught kindergarten yesterday, I didn’t ASK the kids if it was okay if they worked on their letters now. How do you think they will answer?
No, I told them. We are going to be working on letters now.

Hosts, take charge of these guests! If you don’t they will run amok!

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Aw, I can’t act like a drill sergeant and be so hard-nosed. But with kindergarteners? That’s a different deal! :))) Most of the iffy guests I’ve had that I wouldn’t want as guests again were decent people, with feelings, and not hard to work with.

The present guest, the one whose laundry never seems to get done, had requested another week. I thanked him and said I’d enjoyed sharing my home, but he would probably be more comfortable with a private room because… He was fine with it, so it’ll all end on a happy note when he leaves tomorrow.

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Glad it worked out well, but you will have trouble if you are not firm with guests. I give the example of kindergarten because it’s the same principle. If you don’t set your expectations about behavior clearly and firmly, they will walk all over you. Same with guests.

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Yes it did turn out OK. Well, will turn out OK when he packs up manana and leaves. Thanks for your comments.

I’ve probably mentioned a host in my neighborhood who’s got several listings that offer different parts of her house. She has the most extensive set of rules I have ever seen on any ABB listing. I’m going to post them later in this thread.

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19

I’m a bit like you J_Wang. I’m pretty laid back and seem to attract similar guests. 99.9% of them completely understand the home-sharing concept and are respectful. Those that forget to remove their hair from the drain in the shower or to wash their breakfast dishes, I just remind them nicely to do it, they say sorry and that’s that. I’ve had my share of difficult guests though, and you can’t shrink away from dealing with it. I really believe that the initial house tour is the key to everything: reinforcing the ground rules, establishing your authority, making sure they know that it’s YOUR territory etc,. A benign dictatorship, best way to go :wink:

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you are DEAD WRONG my friend. Dead wrong. You are making assumptions that are coming out of left field. If I were the way you described I’d never have lasted as an Air host for the past seven years.

You can’t let guests walk all over you. If you do, you will eventually have trouble.

There’s not one guest who even remotely describes me that way. My listing in no way makes this impression, and frankly I’m taking offense at your comments.

And here I thought the personal mudslinging started by new forum members like you had subsided.

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