Can someone who is not very outgoing be a successful host?

Some frequent poster needs to change their name to something beginning with U.

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I do think that guests like to feel like theyā€™ve become part of their hostsā€™ lives. Iā€™ve seen many reviews where the guest was disappointed that the host wasnā€™t around much. The really surprising reviews are the ones where the guests are disappointed at not meeting both hosts; Iā€™d think one would do the trick. My husband and I are extroverts. We visit with our guests, invite them to join us at mealtime, give them recommendations for local activities, etc. Almost all of our reviews say that the guests enjoyed our friendliness. I think that it would be helpful if you briefly explained to your guests that you are reserved by nature, but that you are more than willing to give them any advice they need. Donā€™t worry about not wanting to hug your guests. I am a big hugger, but I know that many people arenā€™t and itā€™s highly unlikely that anyone will be offended by you not hugging them.

I call it practice. There was a period of my life when i hardly saw any people but my family. And that makes you very isolated and sort of out of practice how to connect with people. Then it doesn not take long to get used to people around you, and interact more freely.
SOunds like its the job for you!

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I would think those are very important things, especially the latter, because the best hosts (and people) are those that have a ā€˜can doā€™ attitude; and that nothing is a ā€˜problemā€™. Personally, I never even use the words problem, concern or issue in my language, they all three drip with depressing heaviness. :rolling_eyes:

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Iā€™m chortling to myself non-stop! ā€¦spewed a mouthful of my alcohol, darn it.

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Oddly, Iā€™ve been thinking of starting a Blog titled ā€œAirbnb hosting for Introvertsā€!

I think introverts bring many gifts to hosting, they are often sensitive to peoplesā€™ needs, and as you say, are usually detail-orientated and like to solve problems. And although they (we!) are not big on small talk and rowdy parties (ugh!) we can often connect more deeply in a one-to-one (ot -two) situation.

I do think that the personal contact between host and guest can add to the holiday experience, and this is borne out by our reviews which focus on, ahem, what lovely people we are! .This is not accidental: both my husband and I are dyed-in-the-wool introverts who have learned to develop our social skills mostly through a career attached to the diplomatic service. What I have found is that itā€™s the quality rather than the quantity of the interaction thatā€™s important.

I therefore make sure that if possible Iā€™m around to welcome guests and after theyā€™ve settled in (or next morning if theyā€™re arriving late) I spend some time finding out what their plans are, going over directions for the beach, town centre etc and getting to know them a little. After that initial meeting, one of us usually makes contact about once a day - their terrace gives onto our garden and pool so itā€™s easy to do without being too intrusive - in a how was your day? anything we can help with? 10-minute chat.

In the second half of their stay (most guests are here about a week) we invite them to have a glass of wine and tapas with us. If we get on well with them it can extend to several bottles and an inpromptu supper, and if we donā€™t click, they still seem to appreciate it and we feel weā€™ve fulfilled our hosting duty!

I also think that there are certain ā€œrules for Introvertsā€ that can make hosting a less stressful experience:

  • Donā€™t host single people unless theyā€™re coming to work. You will worry that they are lonely and think you have to be their best friend/mother/tour guide

  • If you are in a house-sharing situation, make sure you have a private space to retreat to - you know how important your alone time is to you.

  • I suggest a 3-day minimum stay - this gives you more time to become comfortablw with having the guests around.

  • Unless itā€™s financially necessary, donā€™t fill all the time with guests. We only host from May-September, but even so I try to have a few free days each month.

OK, the post is getting overlong ā€¦ but at last I donā€™t have to write that blog now! As Yana said, it becomes easier with practice and I am sure guests appreciate thoughtful sincerity as much, or more, than the stereotype ā€œmine hostā€ matiness that used to be expected.

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I have almost no actual interaction with guests except for texts (good morning, I hope your first night was comfortable! Let me know if you have any questions or need anything at all) & I get rave reviews for being so helpful, a great host, etc. I prefer to not meet guests & they seem fine with it.

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I certainly think thereā€™s room for both types of hosting and one isnā€™t better than the other - theyā€™re just different beasts! I think your type is easier when itā€™s a completely separate rental, and you obviously show your guests youā€™re looking after them by your texts. It would be difficult for us to do this since we are basically in the same house (guests are in the garden flat). I do worry sometimes that itā€™s not possibl for us to give them complete privacy, which ends up with us not using our garden and pool as oftn as we might like to ā€¦

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Iā€™m not a chummy person and have been hosting since 2012. My listing says that I work at home. This automatically makes guests think twice before interrupting me for purely social purposes. I put an info sheet in the room when they arrive that I have refined until there is really nothing they need to ask me. Younger people know to use Google to find nearby restaurants and services. My current guest has been her for months and Iā€™ve only seen her three times. And this is the master suite in my own home!

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I signed up for this group again just to reply to this note.

YES.

We are Superhosts and we do pretty well by Airbnb, I would recommend to anyone. The thing is this, I am not a people person, not at all. It is all I can do to tolerate people in discussion groups and on FB.

We are upfront about what weā€™re like, who I am and all the rest of it. And I find, the more me-ish I am the better it works.

From time to time we get a few Princesses and that is when my husband takes on the task of dealing with them but I am real with our guests and most of them really seem to like it.

Sometimes I think of myself as the soup nazi of Facebook and you would think that would put people off. In fact, in our listing there are warnings about the kind of people who typically do not like us, warnings asking them not to book with us and weā€™re booked solid for July despite that.

Women from Arlington and divorcees, male or female, from California tend to dislike us. I try to keep them from booking with us but they come anyway. All I can do is tell them, I wonā€™t stop them from booking but really, I think they would be better off at one of the fussier, frillier places nearby and let the chips fall where they may.

You have to be yourself. There is someone for every personality type.

Now I have to run and get the beds made for tonightā€™s guests.

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You ask them if they are divorced? How do you know?
I also try to stop people looking for granite, stainless and travertine, coz none here. :smile:

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Introvert hermit female here! I rent out my personal bedroom while I camp out in my own lounge/kitchen on an air mattress 3/4 of the time because my London rent is so highā€”but I love my flat, and I hope this situation is temporary. I work from home too.

I put off hosting for a few years because I was so worried, and uncomfortable with the idea of strangers in my home, although I desperately needed the money. I was scared of sexual assault, theft, awkwardness, having to small talk, feeling squeezed out of my own space, not be allowed to be myself in my own home, not being in control, etc etc. In the end I had to do it, and so I decided I had to enjoy it. What made it bearable was that Iā€™d already spent a year going to networking events on my own, forcing myself to talk to strangers, so I had some recent practice. A year before I would not have been able to host.

It really helped me to read posts on here on how to set strict rules and deal with expectations, and so I found that it all comes down to writing a good listing that clearly outlines how much + how you will interact. I decided to overcome my discomfort by being very welcoming and aim for ā€˜deepā€™ chats with my guest, and avoid the small talk. So far itā€™s been great, and I invite the guest into my space to chat at least once during their stay. I make sure we mostly talk about them, their work/life/love situation and some of them even thank me for the ā€˜sessionsā€™ and tell me it has helped them. It has backfired a little in that I now get guests who want to book solely because of the friendliness that so many guests have mentioned in their reviews.

Like others have said, being an introvert usually also means being sensitive and attentive to details, and those are great host qualities. I run a friendly dictatorship, where I am warm and open, but I also close the door when I need to, I donā€™t take any shit and I make sure my needs for space and solitude are thoroughly met. This is mentioned in the listing, under the semi-guise that I work from home and prefer guests who have a full schedule.

One of you mentioned the therapy angle, and I agree. Hosting has helped me become more relaxed around strangers and Iā€™ve grown as a person in that way. It has also led me to have the guts to start up another rental business where I have to deal with people a lot. Iā€™m still not a natural, and sometimes I even talk too much, as I donā€™t have a natural instinct for conversations, but itā€™s all a learning process.

My listing: https://www.airbnb.co.uk/rooms/10356018

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Haha! - love this comment.

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It is interesting that you would think being a soup nazi puts people off. At first I thought the same. But I have found that over time I am much happier and gain more respect with having strict rules. Itā€™s just finding the fine line of the best way to present them.

It seems the more flexible you areā€¦the average person sees this as an invitation to take advantage of a person.

Itā€™s so sad that so many human beings are not trustworthy people.

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Hi @eyeborg,

Iā€™m sort of a hermit too!

I took a look at your listing. Interesting - itā€™s quite artistic looking. Are you into the arts?

One thing that occurred to me is that you only take single people, but I donā€™t see any intrinsic reason why you couldnā€™t take couples. Based on my limited experience, a lot of people travel in couples, particularly internationally.

Also, can you identify the painting of the reclining nude above the bed? It looks vaguely familiar. And what is all that red drapery made of?

How do you know they are divorsed? ANd i thought divorced mean more happier, no?Just curious whats wrong with Californians?

I think people a bit misinterpret what actually introvert and extravert mean. Its not how they communicate or how outgoing they are. Its how they recharge their brains.
I am considered being very outgoing , easy to make friends and keep them, chatty, and enthusiastic in my communication with people. Butā€¦ i am defiinitely an introvert. I suffer from crowds, and canā€™t stand big parties where everyone are talking at the same time. Even in my very young years when everyone was in some club every weekend, i was missing out on a lot of fun, i guess. I went to a club couple times and then had to rest for a week after that. I prefer small parties where i can talk one on one with a person.
My friend is a total opposite. He is not a big talker, and come across as not very pleasant but he recharges when he is at some crowded place like festival or club. He calls it feeding on peopleā€™s energy.

Hosting suits me perfectly. I am not getting overwhelmed by small talks and then retreat to my room to rest.
I am glad it works for you too. And i agree with another poster, being yourself is very improtant in not being burned out by this job. Setting rules , telling people :ā€œthis is how we do it in this houseā€ is the only way to survive and keep going in this hosting business.

I also just specified that a guest with full time job will be my perfect guest. I donā€™t think i want to host someone long term if they are not employed and just will hang out around the house

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Yanaā€¦what exactly does that mean? I always thought it is the degree of personal inhibition.

Its all about energy. We lose or gain energy by interacting. Being introvert does not mean that a person is shy or non communicative. It can be both. Being introvet means that a person need solitude to rest, and recharge, To stay away from people is the best medicine for introvert when a person feels overwhelmed, tired and restless.
Its not behavorial

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I see. So maybe one of the differences between introverts and extroverts is how quickly they recharge, the introvert needing more time, in more solitude. The extrovert perhaps has a higher energy level to start with and can recharge ā€˜on the goā€™.