Aggressive and rude young mother

Dear fellow Airbnb Hosts,

I met my first (and I hope my last) aggressive and rude guest 1who hasn’t any sense of hygiene. As she was behaving without respect and in such an unacceptable manner that I told my husband and he felt obliged to call and disuss with Airbnb about the possibility asking the family not to check into our apartment. A case manger in Canada called her but was unable to communicate with her in neither English nor French. A Russian-speaking Airbnb staff would only be available 24 hours later. It would be too late to ask her not to check in. So I wrote to Airbnb instead of asking her not to check-in, tell her why I found her attitude and behavoir unacceptable. She sent me an angry message (after the call of Airbnb’s Russian speaking staff) swearing that she would write me a negative review so that no Russian guests would ever reserve my apartment in the future.

Would you please comment on my following review?

Диана was the the only rude and unrespectful guest among the 400 guests whom I have hosted since June 2017. She has no notion of hygiene and was an inconsiderate guest who behaved in an unacceptable manner.

Day of their arrival :

The family arrived 4 hours before check-in time to drop off their 3XL suitcases, 1 kid’s suitcase, 3 big fully packed back-packs, a few fully filled plastic bags and a baby strolley. The baby was big and cute but the parents look very stressed out. No smile, no greetings from them. Not even a written nor a verbal thank you for my letting them dropping off their many big bags early.

Once in the apartment, Диана didn’t bother to ask before going into the bedroom and putting her baby (whose back was full of leaked stools) on the bed without a mat or a towel and stained the mattress protection right away. She didn’t apologize. I told her that the pull-up diapers were obviously too small for her 1-year-old baby, which could be the reason for the severe stools leakage. She got irritated and said that they were the biggest size. (Well, they may be the biggest in her country but in France pull-up diapers for even teenagers are available in the majority of supermarkets.)

Her husband asked to use the toilette and the toilette seat was very dirty after his use.

When they were done, none of them washed their hands.

I always try to be very clear about the do’s and don’ts to avoid possible misunderstandings.
Guests from all around the world can be so different and we can never assume that someone knows how to operate everything - the TV, the induction hob, the shower, the door-lock, anything! But Диана didn’t want to listen to me. She said to me at least twice that she had rented many upscale accommodations, nobody ever bothered her with any house rules, why did I have to bother her with any house rules or directions for such a modest apartment.

When I told her how to turn on and off the heaters (the reversible air-conditiner), she said that in her country, they have much better machines.

Her husband asked me to type in the password on his cell phone for the WiFi connection. When he asked her to pass me hers, Диана refused with impatience saying that anyway the password and the WiFi network was written down, she could get connected herself later. I showed her while reading to her the written password letter by letter, number by number.

She refused to listen when I was giving her other useful information. At 10pm, she messaged me a few times because she was unable to get connected to the WiFi. At 10.30pm, she asked me where the cutting board was…

I had never needed to dispose of nappies when I hosted babies or small children. With the family of Диана, even before their actual check-in, I had to wash the soiled mattress protection and dispose of their baby’s stinky nappy due to the young mother’s negligence.

The second day: She received a phone call from Airbnb about my complaint, she swore to write me a negative review.

Day of their departure :

They said they were leaving and asked where they should leave the keys. We asked them to leave the keys inside the apartment.

When we arrived, they had already left our apartment and were waiting for their Uber outside our building. However, they had left both entrance doors of our apartment grand open. The towel dryer was set to its maximum - burning hot with a washed female underpant already dry hanging on it. I rushed out of our building to return it to her. Her husband lauged when he recognised it but Диана got so mad and she came back in our building, throwing her underpant into a trash bin for recyclable objects while assaulting me verbally.

I checked the remote controls of the heaters: 26°C in the bedroom and 27°C in the living room. I looked at the electricity meter, they had consummed 12€ in eletricity while the weather was mild: 15°-19°C during the day and 7-9°C at night. During the coldest months in December and January, the average consumption was no more than 4€/day.

Instead of putting the smelly nappies straight in the garbage container, double bagged, out in the courtyard under the staircase as instructed, they had accumulated all the used nappies during their stay of 2 days, all mixed up with household wastes, glass and plastic bottles in the same garbage bin indoor, taking over our apartment with an aweful smell. I had to dispose of them without being able to separate the recyclable trash.

Although there were only three dirty cups in the sink, the fridge was full of cooked dishes for at least two meals. When I emptied the dishes and pots, I discovered a burnt pot.

I tried to stop them from checking into our apartment via Airbnb but they failed to do so. I can’t recommend them to the Airbnb community.

@Miyima What you posted above isn’t a review, it’s a novel. You need to condense your review into a few pithy sentences, no one needs to know all the gritty details (I’m sorry you got such a horrid guest).
“Guest arrived 4 hours early to drop off a small mountain of luggage. On return for check-in, guest was extremely rude, refused to listen to instructions, stating that she shouldnt have to be “bothered” with house rules or instructions. Then faulted me later because she couldn’t figure things out. Blasted the heating, running up a bill four times the normal for one night. Place left dirty with smelly diapers in open bags. Definitely not recommended.”
Something like that.


The following should be your review. Everything else you wrote was 'way too much detailed information about things.

CANNOT RECOMMEND Диана. She was VERY rude and neither she nor her husband has any notion of personal hygiene (dirty diapers, dirty baby stools stained the mattress cover, unwashed hands, and more). They would not listen to instructions on operating the AC/Heat unit, WiFi, locks, cooker, etc. and was a most inconsiderate guest who behaved unacceptably.


Pardon my bluntness, but if I saw this review on a guest’s profile, I would doubt the host’s credibility due to the length and emotional nature of this review. Some of the complaints are valid, while others feel like you were watching the guest and counting her missteps. I also can’t follow the sequence of events: you called to cancel due to her hygiene prior to her arrival?


Hi Xena,

She had asked twice to check in at noon and claimed that they had a baby with a lot of luggage. Early check-in wasn’t possible for me but I said that I could let them drop off their bags, pick up the keys at noon and come back any time from 4.30pm onwards without making an appointment with me as I don’t live near. Everything (diaper changing, the use of the toilette, not wanting me to explain do’s and don’ts to her…) happened between 12.00 & 12.30pm during which they were in the apartment “dropping off their bags”, 4 hours before their official check-in time. We called Airbnb around 2pm and I waited till 5.30pm wanting to ask them to leave with their bags and they hadn’t return. The Airbnb case manager was able to reach her by phone but was unable to communicate with her in neither English nor French.

Thank you very much, Muddy, for your help. You are very helpful. :slight_smile:

I finished preparing the apartment before 4.30pm and stayed till 5.30pm the day of their arrival but they hadn’t returned. Everything happened during the 30 minutes (12.00-12.30pm) they were in our apartment “dropping off their bags”.

Thank you very much, Ken, for your good advice.

You’re so right. Very few negative reviews can violate the Aribnb policy.

Airbnb does everything not to remove negative reviews from guests.

I agree with the others. It’s too long and too many details. I would write “Disrespected property and refused to follow instructions.” I would also click on “Do not recommend.”

The actual “threat” was in the messages thread on the Airbnb app. The customer service team member was able to see the message thread. They said they could not do anything about a Guest leaving an overall bad review if it did not violate their policy. There was no foul language in the review, but it was filled with non-stop lies and the fact that this Guest cancelled and had to be removed by Airbnb (he was told to leave the premises by Airbnb or I would have to call the authorities) didn’t change a thing.

I did read the “new policy” on this matter and I am hoping that things will change when Hosts encounter these types of Guests. The last 1-star review that I have on my listing was also a similar experience.

Exactly @Miyima, this is what happened to me in my situation. It’s now happened with 2 Guests and I think there needs to be a change when you have 90 percent 5-star reviews and then encounter a Guest that leaves you a review unlike any other. It is clear by reading all my reviews that these are just disgruntled Guests that were not allowed to behave the way they wanted to–disrespecting a Host’s home and not following House Rules. A Host should not be penalized if everything was made clear to the Guest but they still ignored the rules. Change needs to happen in favor of Hosts.

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I honestly thought that the above was the review and the rest of it was the OP venting. As others have said, it’s incredibly long.

When we’re writing reviews we have to bear in mind that we’re writing them for busy people. Hosts are generally dashing about doing turnovers, attending to the many matters involved in hosting and, in some cases, they have another job too. They don’t have the time to read long reviews about their forthcoming guests.

Often, reviews tell more about the host than they do the guest.

From time to time, we all get a guest who arrives in not the best of moods because of arduous travel, a row with their travelling companion, not felling well, who knows? Also from time to time, guests simply don’t want to have house rules recited at them or be shown how everything works.

JMI but it seems to me that the only real issue here is that she didn’t dispose of the nappies causing the room to smell. That affects the host, the fact that they didn’t wash their hands are issues personal to them.

They don’t sound like great guests, that’s for sure, but if the rental was in reasonable condition and they were in general quiet, then I’d leave a quick review mentioning the nappy thing then move on.


I’d say it’s also a “real issue” that the guest stated she shouldn’t have to be “bothered” to pay attention to house rules or the explanations of how things work in the place. Her rudeness I would also consider an issue, as well as the fact that they arrived 4 hours before check-in to drop off luggage, as they had been told they could, yet just started making themselves at home, using the bathroom, plunking the poop-soaked baby down on the bed without any protection, blasting the heat, and threatening a bad review. The dirty nappies were only one aspect of the guest’s behavior that would make most hosts not want these people as guests, as far as I can see.


As we know only too well from this forum, all hosts are different. :slight_smile:

I think they’d arrived before check in because the host had told them it was okay to drop off their luggage? I’ve found that quite often, luggage-droppers have been in an uber from the airport after being stood in the immigration queue for however long so do need to use the loo. The baby obviously badly needed nappy attention too.

I’m not saying that these guests were good, they obviously weren’t, but some hosts don’t want to explain every rule and don’t need guests to be friendly. I can sometimes tell when doing the house tour that guests want me to get lost so that they can relax after their journey.

The guest sounds like a pretty horrible person, and she’s certainly not a 5 star guest, but if I were the OP (and I know we’re all different) I wouldn’t spend any more time worrying about it. Just give an appropriate review and move on to the next guests - hoping that they will definitely be 5 star.

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A few months ago, a couple with a baby lost my keys and I opened a file with the Resolution Centre for the replacement of the 4 locks on the 2 doors. Not only did they refuse to pay, they also wrote me a 1-star review commenting how unjustified my claim was as they were 100% certain that they had dropped the keys in the right letterbox, and that my claim had completely soured the memory of their happy holidays in Nice. The review had nothing to do with the quality of my apartment which the young mother actually complimented in one of her messages. I asked Airbnb to read the message of compliments on my apartment and to remove the negative review. They refused to delete it by saying that it didn’t violate their policy… I asked for help on this forum and two hosts told me that revealing the content of a file opened with the Resolution Centre is indeed a violation of Airbnb’s review policy. I called Airbnb and the employee was surprised by my knowledge on this point and she was obliged to delete the review. Airbnb is not honest, they take advantage of hosts who ignore their review policy. Because a lot of claims filed by hosts via their Resolution Centre were followed by very negative reviews… How many hosts know that they have the right to get the negative reviews removed if the content of the claims with the Resolution Centre is revealed in the reviews?


Definitely there are things that would bother some hosts and some not. “OMG, the guests cooked curry!” (I love the smell of curry) “The guests left toothpaste splattered all over the mirror and counter!” (I’m going to clean and sterilize it anyway, so why would I care?) “The guests just hang out all day, it’s driving me crazy.” (I enjoy hanging out with my guests and consider it a compliment that they feel comfortable here)
Then there are things guests might do that would be a bother if one is home hosting that wouldn’t be an issue at all in an entire house listing. (taking over the kitchen, being unsociable or unfriendly come to mind)
I agree, I wouldn’t waste time obsessing over a guest like this OP had, I’d just leave an honest review and forget about someone I never have to see or deal with again.


Oh, please…low-level Airbnb employees (actually, they’re most likely contractors) are trained to provide the most basic responses in the shortest amount of time possible. I don’t think there’s any intentional dishonesty, just ignorance.


Babies for sure can make mother’s rude and aggressive…especially if our host gives us " looks" . I know those looks … I gave birth to especially cranky and non stop screaming and pooping baby long time ago …thankfully she outgrew it. And for years seemed like everyone around me knew better how to raise my child…at least judging by stranger’s comments how my baby shouldn’t be misbehaving .
Can we give young mothers a break…especially after long travels and not being able to check in right away? Anyone who ever traveled with a baby knows how hard it is and stressful and exsausting and how sometimes it’s impossible to change those diapers in time …and how sometimes being overwhelmed mother’s can’t concentrate on any checking instructions and all they want to do is rest.


About negative reviews—-maybe 18 months ago, Chesney announced Airbnb was going to drop an outlier star rating from the average. For example host has 100-5* ratings then 1 unhappy guest leaves 2•, the 2* is not included

Does that mean they will drop the associated review? If Airbnb doesn’t do that automatically due to the threats, it may be worth asking.

Also, do you get many Russian visitors? If not, ignore the written review .

If I remember correctly reviews show based on location (or maybe language)of the guest. For example: my English speaking USA guests do not see the reviews left by my French-Canadian guests; however when a potential guest is French-Canadian those reviews display.