Airbnb - Tenant reviews of the Candidates
See this hilarious piece in the New Yorker magazine:
“The Donald was a terrible guest. He demanded a bed ‘fit for a Trump,’ but I had no idea what the heck that meant. This is Iowa. We have good, normal beds, like most Americans have. His stay only got worse from there, and culminated in Mr. Trump threatening to deport my wife, who is from New Mexico.” —Mike, Iowa City.
“Mr. Trump appeared to pay in full—and certainly made full use of my four-bedroom apartment in Maine, leaving it a total mess. But now the bank is refusing payment, claiming that Mr. Trump never did business with them. Now I’m looking for answers and he won’t answer my calls.” —Annie, Portland.
“Secretary Clinton stayed in my spare room in New Hampshire. She seemed nice, and left the space just as she found it. Well, I mean, my Wi-Fi was messed up afterward, and I’m having trouble getting e-mails, but I dont’ think that has anything to do with her.” —Mitch, Nashua.
“Secretary Clinton and her family stayed on our ranch in Colorado. They were fine guests, and delighted in the ‘outdoorsy’ experience. They went out of their way to empathize with our plight, which was sweet of them, although they didn’t seem to understand that we liked living on a ranch.” —Ruth, Colorado Springs.
“Donald Trump stayed at my two-bedroom apartment for a week. He said he ‘fell in love with the place’ and immediately signed me up to franchise my house, nationwide, as ‘Trump-N-B.’ It was all a whirlwind, and I’m still not exactly sure what happened, but Trump seems to have declared bankruptcy and left me with a five-million-dollar bill.” —Vern, Lexington.
“I distrusted Hillary Clinton the first minute she walked through my front door. There was just something sketchy about her, you know? After she left, I checked all the closets and drawers, but nothing was missing. There were no complaints from neighbors, and the house looked clean. I haven’t found anything she did wrong yet, but I’m sure I will.” —Rupert, Oyster Bay.