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Offer an obese guest a different chair?

What would you do?

Guests checked in. VERY nice people. Dad is huge. His backside may be, literally, 4’ wide. My breakfast table has just folding chairs. I wanted to offer to get him an alternate chair, but wasn’t sure if that would be offensive or not.

Thoughts?

If you swap one out before breakfast, he may naturally head to that one. It will be less offensive than working out a possible “hurt neck/back for life.”

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Yes, I don’t know why I didn’t follow-through on the thought of doing so. I wish I had. I just wanted him to be comfortable.

I am obese. I consider it thoughtful if people give me a chair that I can sit on comfortably without worrying about breaking it. Also, small chairs cut in to the thighs of overweight people. The only thing I would warn you about is saying that you are concerned about your furniture being broken. We like to think that we’re more important than objects. A million thank yous for being considerate instead of judgemental as so many on this board are.

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@EllenN You would be just the person to ask…I have added a small 3 piece bathroom. The distance from the front of the toilet to the wall ended up being smaller/shorter than I would have liked. It’s fine for most people and I’ve only had one obese guest and she stayed before the remodel. I’ve anticipated if I have another what, if anything, I might say. What I decided on was that I would just say “If you’d be more comfortable using the toilet in the hall bathroom, feel free. That bathroom is a little larger.” The hall bath would be better for using the sink and toilet. The guest room ensuite has a nice large shower. Like dcmooney I don’t want to make anyone uncomfortable. Thoughts?

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That is perfect. If you said that to me, I would think of you as an extremely thoughtful host. Of course, I think that dog lovers tend to be a cut above as human beings. Believe me, anyone who is overweight knows it, so you don’t have to be afraid to mention that we might be more comfortable with larger accommodations.

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Oh, I just thought of what I could have said “Oh, these chairs are what the kids use for school; let me get something better for you”.

@EllenN, thanks for your input. In a way it’s silly for me not to have said anything - it’s not like it’s a secret that he was so large. I just didn’t want him to feel awkward or embarrassed in any way.

Well, here’s a thought - I can get new chairs for the breakfast area, which I need to do anyway.

@KKC, my bathroom was fit into a hallway. The shower is 32x32 (I think). The toilet portion is literally under the stairs - it’s very small. I was concerned for man but to use the other bathroom would mean he’d have to walk upstairs - which I don’t think would have been comfortable, either. So…things to think through.

Live and learn. I hope they enjoyed themselves anyway; they seemed to. They were on their ‘familymoon’. They had just gotten married and were visiting respective families with the husband’s 9 year old son.

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@dcmooney - that’s very considerate of you. You could simply say to him ‘could I get another chair for you that may be more comfortable?’ After all, if you had a guest with other physical anomalies, such as a broken leg in a cast, then you’d offer something to make them more comfortable in your home.

Because they are nice people, I’m sure your guest will appreciate your consideration and not be offended.

yes, you’re absolutely right. Next time, I’ll be more prepared.

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Hi Nancy,

I appreciate that you’re trying to be sensitive, but saying that those chairs are for the children would come across to me as patronizing. If it were me, I would prefer if you just said, “I brought you this chair because I think you’ll be more comfortable in it”. It’s kind of like when we offer to pull out both twin beds for tall people so that they can sleep diagonally, except being tall doesn’t come with a stigma. Again, thank you very much for being accommodating to overweight and obese people.

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Oh, good to know - thanks!!

Interestingly, the guest left a very nice review, but in it, mentioned that the shower is small, which it is, and they are plus-sized so it made it challenging. Very true and I can’t complain, and in reality, I’m glad because if another potential guest is in the same situation they can choose somewhere else where they will be more comfortable. I can’t be one-size-fits-all. I had a small space that I was able to turn into a bathroom with a shower, but it’s very small.

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I also like it when guests mention in their reviews aspects of our listing that I want potential guests to be aware of. This is because I’ve realized that while potential guests don’t read the listing; they do read the reviews.

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As Erma Bombeck said, “One size fits all of what?”

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