Just for fun: worst suggestion EVER included in a review

Someone asking me to get rid of my dogs in the review would provoke a scathing response from me and I’m in the “don’t respond” camp. LOL.

3 Likes

a working fireplace! and this was from an airbnb host!

1 Like

We are in North mallorca, we have a policy - bed and towels change every 7 days - I supply cleaning materials in the kitchen and bathroom, should anyone want to tidy up. Our garden is a pine forest, we are surrounded by beautiful trees, yet I have been critised as our place “gets dusty” … sometimes you just cant please everyone

1 Like

Not all reviews… but I had some overseas guests prior to arrival ask me to guarantee them that they would not contract a mosquito virus whilst in Australia (their exact words…guarantee which just makes me think litigation) when they arrived they were then concerned that a coyote might eat them whilst out riding the bikes. I could only guarantee them that they wouldn’t be eaten by a coyote…(being in Australia).
A recent review from guests from this same country read, we loved our stay here however it was way too dark which at least helped us to see the stars clearly…one of the pitfalls of living in the country apparently…No city lights

8 Likes

Yes ! I had one couple stay who were hosts elsewhere and even though their review was nice they filled my guest book with suggestions all of which were already in place but they just didn’t look properly…milk jug tick, scissors tick, paper towel tick etc etc. And then they broke my number 1 house rule of no smoking and smoked everywhere including in bed burning a hole in my mattress ! They didn’t even bother to hide it leaving piles of ash everywhere. Not happy Jan

a guest strongly suggested that if I relocated my apartment from Australia to Europe she would be much happier and I would get 5 stars. she gave me 3 stars for my failure

10 Likes

I posted this to another topic, but I simply have to share it here as well as I’m still shocked. Never got such an unreasonable review since I’m doing Airbnb:

The written part of the review is ok, although obviously not enthusiastic, but the stars ratings are just massacre.:smiley:

Overall 3, cleanliness 4,the rest 3.

I couldn’t resist but to ask for an explanation, I haven’t got such bad grades in ages. Especially I didn’t understand what was the problem with check in, since earlier check-in was granted but they didn’t use it in the end, 3 for communication, although I responded promptly to eveything, 3 for accuracy although the written part of the feedback says that apartment is as described…

Got my reply, apparently 3 for communication is because my mom didn’t pet the dog and said she likes animals but doesn’t enjoy petting them.:smiley: All that after my mom prepared barbecue fire for them when they were clueless about it at 8 pm, and provided them with some coal we had, as they were completely unprepared… 3 for accuracy because the bed was broken (bed isn’t broken, this is not accuracy) and 4 for cleanliness because it was too clean and they could smell cleansers. And yes, they didn’t think 3 was a bad grade at all. Said they are happy to change the grade if it harms us.

Sugar on top, the guy says that those are just his suggestions that will help us improve our accommodation. So, let me think… Based on this, I should:

  1. Clean less
  2. Never help guests with bbq or any other activities that they ask help for
  3. The whole family should become avid dog lovers over night
  4. In general, change our personalities, possibly identities

Sure thing, lemme accommodate your nonsensical requests. I still cannot decide whether they are extremely stupid or mean.

5 Likes

I had a guest suggest that I add a dishwasher! She said “It doesn’t feel like vacation when you have to wash your own dishes.”

Really!?! It’s a cabin in the woods! We don’t even have WiFi and she wants me to add a dishwasher in the already small kitchen!

At least she didn’t leave the sink full of dirty dishes like another guest…

2 Likes

I had a guest once who suggested we convert our tub/shower into a walk-in so guests wouldn’t have to step up over the side of the tub. And we should install hand rails. Mind you, this woman was not old or handicapped and didn’t need those things for herself.

1 Like

Wow!

Can’t say any more!

I had a guest complain that my home was “Crowded - lots of furniture,” which I found somewhat surprising. There wasn’t any specific information about what should be removed. The room had a bed, the desk had a chair, there was a dresser in the room, the den has a sofa so you can watch tv, the living room has a coffee table in front of the couch and the dining room has a table, chairs and buffet. Really, a pretty typical furniture set up for each room. Perhaps she would have rather had it empty so that she could sit on the floor? Oh wait… she could do that too!

2 Likes

No words.

I once got cracked on Accuracy because the apartment was more spacious than advertised. Yup. I got marked down because something exceeded someone’s expectations.

This was after I had rescued their stupid reservation off FlopKey to save him money. Never again.

6 Likes

I just had a review that said ‘The restaurants and bars are within walking distance although the beach walk is long.’

Actually, we are exactly midway between the two!

2 Likes

Omg!!! This is so idiotic! Getting marked down for things that are better than expected… Really, no words!

What I’m angry about the most is that I cannot warn other hosts about these guests. They were normal guests, left place tidy, communicated rather normally… The only issue was that they kind of asked for an early check-in and then didn’t show up earlier nor announced that they gave up on the option. But since we didn’t have a fixed agreement on the time in any case, I didn’t slam them on this. Also, my mom said they seemed a bit of a confused sort of people, but I mean, who downgrades people for such minor things? Apparently, guests do…:expressionless:

That is why I left them a nice review, only to get slammed, and only on stars and in private feedback. There is no way for future hosts to know this and I feel terribly sorry for anyone who’s going to host them not knowing this fact.

1 Like

An axe. There is ample firewood all split and ready onsite, but one guest suggested I provide an axe because ‘some people might find it fun to split their own’.
Reminder email: ‘Make sure you stock the fridge with bagels, clean the bathroom, and sharpen the axe.’

8 Likes

We have had two air con requests. Please just book a place with air con. I do in places that need it. We have fans and a pool. One guest said the fan was noisy so they didn’t use it and it was too hot! If they had used the fan it would be ok, I know we have slept there. WTF?

2 Likes

There is an option to cool that does not require duct work. It’s a wall mounted unit that heats and cools. We had one installed for our basement apartment so our guests can control their environment. Best investment we ever made.

1 Like

Yes I have that in my living room. We are installing them in both bedrooms next month, but we’re still looking at $5000.

In this thread are suggestions for:
Less clean, more dog attention, new appliances, add appliances in small spaces, add screened porches, add air conditioning, relocate the condo to a different country, provide less assistance, provide an ax to chop already split firewood, change furniture to meet guest length of stay, renovate the bathroom to accomodate a different style tub/shower and much more. If we shared this information with people who aren’t hosts do you think they would believe us?

8 Likes

$5,000 ouch! I hope you can raise the rent!