Is it okay to have company when you have Airbnb guests staying?

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Bit of a bold topic, but wondering what other hosts views on this is? So, I own my own house which I’ve been hosting in for over four years. It’s a modest three bed terraced as a live in host. I use the two spare rooms for airbnb. It is close to the local university, I get a lot of students & people attending conferences. I am single & in my thirties. I have recently started seeing a guy that lives in my area. He is a chef, usually finishing work at 10pm, hitting the gym then often coming back to stay at mine. This is made awkward by the fact I sometimes have airbnb guests staying. One guest room is right next to mine, the other at the other end of the hall. It isn’t too bad when it’s just the back room that is occupied, but if there is a guest in the room next to my bedroom, I know they can hear all. It does affect us & we tend to avoid intimacy if there is a guest in the next room. I’ve discussed this with my friends, one of them has stated that at the end of the day, it is my house & I have to live. I’ve never had any noise complaints regarding myself but it does pose the question, is it okay to be intimate when there are paying guests in the house? How to couples who host deal with this? I’m interested in how other hosts feel about this?

I’m looking forward to hearing from you all, host Kat :slight_smile:

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Do you allow couples or do you only host solo guests? Can a solo guest bring home an overnighter?
How sound proof is the connecting walk?
Are you ‘exuberant’ when you are together?

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I wouldn’t worry about it and enjoy your relationship. Hopefully you allow couples in your rooms? Maybe you should put some extra soundproofing into the rooms that are close. It shouldn’t be that difficult.

You can stick some strategic pads on the bedframes so they don’t strike the walls. Or practice silent sex. Think of all the couples that enjoy (small) boat vacations with other cabins nearby.

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Your post title was a bit misleading to me. As a homeshare host myself, I have certainly had visitors when I had guests. It’s my home and I live my life as normal with or without guests. I certainly have daytime and very occasionally overnight, although the overnighters are not love interests, but were family or friends who actually slept on my living room couch, as I only have 2 bedrooms. But I don’t share the living room with guests nor do they have to walk through it to get to their room and bathroom, or the kitchen, which I share with guests.

I did let the upcoming guests know ahead of time, though, that my daughter or a friend would be staying here during their booking, as my listing ad says I live alone and guests are only sharing the house with me. It wasn’t an issue for them, and I wasn’t asking permission, but I thought it polite to let them know.

What you are really asking is whether it’s okay for guests in the adjoining bedroom to hear you and your boyfriend having sex and it sounds like the walls are thin enough that they would. Personally, I think it would make many, if not most guests uncomfortable to have to listen to that. And do you really want them to? If you guys are just talking and having quiet intimacy, nothing wrong with that just because you have guests, though.

Is it possible for you to work out some sort of schedule for when your boyfriend spends the night, and block off days on your calendar for rental of the adjoining bedroom? Then you wouldn’t have feel constrained about audible lovemaking or guests feeling uncomfortable or leaving critical reviews. That’s what I would do in your situation.

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I thinking of all the married and partnered couples who present themselves as a couple and rent rooms in their home. Surely people go on with their lives. I stayed at an Airbnb recently with a couple but their bedroom was downstairs. But their listing makes clear they might have friends over and that they are a couple.

I think it increases the chance of an uncomfortable guest so if you can work around that great. But if not, live your life. As long as your listing is clear and upfront and let the booking rate do what is does. Perhaps the occasional bad review will result. Big deal.

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True, but not all have adjoining guest bedrooms where activity can be heard through the wall. For instance, this host says she has another rental room that’s on the other side of the house.

I’d see it like any noise you think might disturb guests whose bedroom shares a wall with the host’s. One probably wouldn’t talk loudly on the phone or play audible music that might disturb them if the guest was in their bedroom, so audible sex seems much the same, with the added component of hearing something private.

My friend and neighbor started to do some strs in her 2 guest rooms, which are downstairs and have separate entrances, ensuite baths and little kitchenettes. But she was so over the top with feeling that she had to tiptoe around upstairs and not make a sound that she quit doing str after only a couple of guests. I told her she was being silly- that there was no need to feel you couldn’t go about your daily life just because you homeshare, which she wasn’t even really doing, as they didn’t share anything but the front outside staircase with her, but it just didn’t suit her, as she was constantly way too concerned about disturbing guests.

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I think I’d be looking for a solution to that. Is it possible for you to move to the back bedroom?

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Having company to me says having friends for a get together or family over for dinner.

I’m a home share host and say in my listing my partner stays over sometimes and that I have family and friends visit.

I think the difference in our situations is that my partner is more part of my daily life so guests see us cooking dinner together or we share a drink with guests. So that’s more comfortable ,particularly for female guests, than someone turning up late at night who they haven’t met (presuming you let them know in advance he will be staying, but arriving late).

In your situation as you’ve just started seeing each other I’d suggest with longer stay guests you’d feel comfortable with you staying at his when the room next to yours is occupied.

And block out some nights in the room next to yours when you agree to be at yours so you both feel more comfortable at yours.

This will limit your chances of getting poorer reviews from guests who might feel uncomfortable with their host having loud late night sex.

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i think it would only be fair to your guests to be open about it. if i were renting a room, i wouldn’t wanna hear my host getting it on thru the wall. but if its all clearly laid out in your description i see no problem with it.

I converted my detached garage into an apartment that i live in. I do my very best to make myself invisible. most guests don’t even know im there. i do disclose it in my description, but have only ever had 2 guests knock on the door to say hi out of 200ish bookings. the last thing i want to do is make my guests feel uncomfortable. yes i want to live my life, but this is also the life i chose. i chose to host guests in my home. i chose list my home in the way i have done it. everything is my choice, and i try to be up front about my choices with guests before they book my home.

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Hh ha.

I would like to see how this description is ‘laid out’. Please share. [Please – many of us are old, retired and not on Tik-Tok.]

It’s a new relationship. You’re in your 30’s. If it’s not exuberant now, end it. :stuck_out_tongue_winking_eye:

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Ha ha.

This is an interesting question because it combines elements of disclosure to guests, setting expectations, some people’s deep discomfort with others’ sexuality, and also noise disturbance when they might be sleeping.

So: Some guests will feel very uncomfortable hearing other people batter-dipping the corn dog.

These aren’t the kinds of people who you can easily feel out about the topic, because they’re also the kind of people who will feel uncomfortable talking about glazing the donut.

So they’re not going to tell you, “I don’t want to hear you and your chef beau passing the gravy.” They’re just going to squirm quietly and then write a scathing review.

On the other hand, if you disclose in your listing, “After midnight when boo gets home from work, you may hear me doing squat thrusts in the cucumber patch,” then you would ward off the uncomfortable, but might attract weirdos who like to listen.

But even if you have guests who just feel amused, not uncomfortable, hearing other people playing hide the sausage, no guest likes to get woken up at 1am by their host making loud noises, whether it’s groping for trout in a peculiar river** or something else entirely.

In sum, I think you (a) need to disclose that boo might be around (just because, as @helsi says, it could be disconcerting for guests to run into a stranger in the hallways when they’re in their pyjamas), and (b) you need to churn the butter quietly.

(And yes, I did google “euphemisms for sex” in order to write this obnoxious response :sweat_smile: . And in honour of your chef boyfriend, I used all food-related ones. :peach: :eggplant:)

** This one is straight from Shakespeare!

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This is a sensitive and personal topic, and ultimately, each homeowner must make their own decisions about what they feel is appropriate in their own home. However, there are a few things to consider.

First, it’s important to respect the privacy and comfort of guests on Airbnb. They pay for a private room and can enjoy a peaceful and comfortable stay. This includes not being disturbed by loud noises, including those from the homeowner’s personal life. On the other hand, as your friend mentioned, it’s your home and you have the right to live your life. However, it’s important to find a balance between your personal life and your responsibilities as a host. It can be helpful to have a clear policy on noise levels and guest expectations during their stay.

If you decide to be intimate with an Airbnb guest in your home, it’s important to be respectful and considerate. Try to keep noise levels to a minimum and avoid engaging in activities that may disturb your guests. Some couples hosting on Airbnb may choose to block certain dates or just rent out when they know they won’t be there. Others may choose to establish clear boundaries and guidelines for their guests, such as designated quiet times or banning guests from certain areas of the home.

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It’s a stock photo used by numerous websites:

Screenshot 2023-04-20 at 10.23.11 AM
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