Having worked with Indians and traveled to that country, and hosted a dozen or more in my home (not all at once:), there is a very different attitude toward domestic services. What may sound like gall to us is an expression of the norm. Also, it’s been my experience that Indians in general are not confrontational or demanding, but are quite polite and civil. I think these prospective guests would most likely be just fine if you told them exactly what was and what wasn’t going to be available.
The position Indian domestics occupy in modern India has no counterpart in the modern West. It resembles slavery the most, but is technically not slavery, because they aren’t forced to work for anyone. But when people don’t have choices, it isn’t very different from slavery
And poor people (not just domestics) in India are worse off than poor people in the West, who have a reasonable expectation of upward mobility if they are willing to make the effort. If you are poor in India, neither you or your family are going anywhere unless you turn to a profitable life of crime. Which is one reason why crime is so rampant in India.
And such things as universal education and universal health care, which are relatively common in the West, either don’t exist in a place like India, or are a cruel mockery of the concept. E.g. free government schools exist in India, but you wouldn’t want to go to one. I’ve spent time in the ones you pay for, and they’re bad enough.
That’s a bit of a generalization in a nation of 1.3 billion. There are plenty of overtly nasty types here. They just don’t get out of India much. And you might get the rich types who travel outside India. And maybe they made their money by (for example) criminal activity, but they’ve learned to put a good face on it. So they don’t necessarily appear to be the savages they are. But of course rich people are generally not nice in any culture.
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I did narrow it down, tried to anyway, by saying I was talking about my limited experience with Indians. The ones I’ve encountered here in the U.S. mind their own business, are self-sufficient and don’t rock the boat, as they say. Every one of my many Indian guests was easy to deal with and pleasant.
As for the domestics, we touched on this topic briefly before. I know exactly how horribly they are treated. I’ve seen it first hand. The other country that’s probably even worse is Saudi Arabia where they actually do have indentured servitude of their maids who are treated horribly and can’t escape. It’s modern day slavery.
Oh Faheem. I just couldn’t help myself. Had to point this out :))))
Yes, well, that’s one of those generalizations that in my experience is actually valid. I’m sure there must be exceptions, but in my personal experience they are few and far between.
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True, you didn’t say all Indians were like that. Comment withdrawn.
Since I don’t know who your guests were, I can’t say anything about that. But there are plenty of perfectly reasonable working Indian professionals, often not living in India, who travel the globe. The problematic sort tend to be rich Indians from India. Anyway, glad to hear you’ve had a good experience with your Indian guests.
True. Saudi Arabia sounds like one of those places that is actually worse than India in many respects. I’ve never met anyone who has anything good to say about it. But I don’t think SA is the only place where that kind of thing happens.
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I worked many years in Saudi Arabia. I felt so sorry for the maids. Many were Indian but also lots of Filipinos. They are treated like shit and paid so very little.
Wow. Well there’s always a way to say it. There were some crazy guests in the news a while back and the host had a great way of saying something:
“May I suggest that when one hosts this guest, you may wish to review the services offered at check in to ensure there are no misunderstandings or assumptions? It may also be helpful to let them know what times you’re available to answer questions, as well as confirm the details in your listing.”
Any host could read between those lines.
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Except… Why speak in code? If the guest is bad, tell it like it is!
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It just seems ungracious and whiny.
Because this is a hospitality business. I fully expect that something might happen that I don’t like. Unless it’s pretty egregious, I probably won’t get too upset, though I might bitch on the forum.
I’m letting people use a room in my house; I’m taking that risk. I have to accept that things might not go perfectly or they might make a mess. I’m basically an innkeeper and I just have to deal with it, within reason.
I respectfully disagree. It’s not a traditional hospitality business. We are not hotels or inns. We are sharing our personal homes, so different standards apply to guest behavior.
If giving a bad guest an honest review makes me whiny and ungracious then so be it. No need to speak in review code. That’s ridiculous. The guests don’t speak in code when reviewing hosts. Why should we dance around the truth?
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I get where you’re coming from. We as hosts might see it this way, but I’m not sure that guests see it like that. That’s my point, as well as that I expect to pick up after people etc.
You know the above reminds me of something I was thinking today. The other thread about rules, cause me to get this gut feeling.
I could ~imagine~ how some people may find hotels yes impersonal and cold, but also efficient and perhaps with so much less fuzz than with many places in Airbnb, which sometimes may be too full of requirements and foreplay. Yes they tend to be cheaper, true. Personally, I don’t sweat the small stuff, there isn’t one guest that doesn’t do something ‘wrong’ or breaks something, or doesn’t follow the rules; if it is small, I let it go. I just stay happier that way.
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I am in agreement. I don’t sweat the small stuff, however, I have hosted several other guests and the only issue was when a guest dropped a very expensive and new steam iron on the floor. I absorbed the cost even though he helped himself to my iron not the guest iron I had given him before.
All my other guests have been great but this guy kept on taking and then chose to ignore things when I said No. He even said that had he stayed in a hotel it would have cost several hundred pounds more. If you want a hotel service you stay in a hotel. Most people know what to expect when staying in a Bed and Breakfast. I certainly do not consider polishing your shoes on someone’s carpet (with no paper on the floor) and leaving black shoe polish marks small stuff I consider it disrespectful.
I also told him that tea and coffee was complimentary and wondered why my son’s drink was going down so quickly that would be because he was taking it out of the cupboard and helping himself to it.
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Did someone say there is a bad guest forum - can I join please and who do I speak to?
Maids are paid very little around the globe.
I would let many small stuff go if it was just for us, but i have 2 guests room, and if one keep on doing things wrong and makes the other guest’s stay uncomfortable i will not let it slide. Like my present upstairs guest. I am sure he means to be disrespectful but he is. He brought home a girl while i was away and kept having sex so loudly every night that the guest in downstairs bedroom could not sleep for several nights. Or he gets up at 6, goes to the kitchen and slams kitchen cabinets for an hour at this early hour when everyone is asleep.
Thats why i like hotels better. I only choose AIr if i cant afford hotel, or…of its a beautifull island:)
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I agree. And it’s such hard work. It’s a booming business where I am and there are many small start-ups with small crews; they are the ones that make pretty good money. It’s the larger businesses that employ undocumented people who aren’t paid so well. But those are cleaning people I suppose, not really maids that live in, huh?
People don’t have them here so much any longer except for the very wealthy.
I hear you Yana. If they become bothersome is a whole other matter.
I’ve also seen listings where the host takes avoiding high maintenance guests to the extreme. There was one listing in New York which said something like, “Now look here. You’re gonna be a New Yorker, and your’e gonna live like a New Yorker, which means walking to the corner store and buying your own *&^@#$%! toilet paper!!!”
Not in so many words, but that was the gist. I don’t understand what is so hard about leaving a roll. Yes, people can buy their own, but many guests in New York are international tourists. Imagine this: You get off a long haul flight, stand in endless lines at JFK, then take a harrowing ride with a road rage taxi driver to your Airbnb…Exhausted and barely able to function, you suddenly need to use the bathroom and…No toilet paper for you!!! Get down to the bodega like a real New Yorker!!!
No thanks. And the place wasn’t even that cheap. Middle tier.
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