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Guests that bought back a party to our property


So, last weekend we had a young couple staying with us. (We have a detached studio suite about 20 feet from our home.) When I checked them in, I told them to make themselves at home, but if they were to use our patio in the evening to please make sure to keep the noise level low because we have had issues with our neighbors. They assured me that they would be quiet since it was just the two of them.

Well, the last night they were with us we noticed about 8 people out on our patio drinking wine. Yes, it was early (only about 7:00), but I certainly didn’t want to be liable for 4 or 5 other people drinking on our property. At 8:00 I politely asked them to break up the party.

My question is, how do I review them. Do I give them the benefit of the doubt? They were fine in every other regard and I did not have “no unregistered guests” in my rule book (I do now).

In 2 years of hosting I’ve never had guests bring back anyone without asking first, and usually it was one friend or family member just to see our space. I feel like I wasn’t prepared to handle that situation gracefully.

I’m pregnant so I’m sure I’m over thinking this…any advice would help. Thanks!


I do think it is bad manners of guests to have parties without letting the host know. They have booked for 2, and although guests often think that booking a whole apartment gives them carte Blanche, there are things to consider such as the fact that visitors are less likely to be concerned about damage, breakages, spills or missing items, noise, and even the fact that plumbing may not be able to cope with the extra visitors.

It’s unfortunate that our rules develop only once someone goes and does the unthinkable, but alas it seems to be the case for all of us. We each have different rules based on our preferences and different set ups. Some hosts don’t mind parties so much because they have cheaper replaceable items, non-stainable surfaces, an no nearby neighbors to bother (most do I think, because too many guests plug the toilets and all kinds of mischief), and other hosts will take children while many won’t. What’s important is that you now have it listed clearly that no unauthorized guests are allowed on the property. If anyone breaks the rule I have no idea what you can really do, but we just hope it acts as an aversion.

I suggest you write a review stating some positives about the guests, but also that you were surprised by a small party on the last night. This will ensure that other hosts know what to expect, and also that the guests know to communicate with their hosts better next time. The fact that you had told them that you had problems with noise on the balcony, and they allowed their friends to gather out there shows they are inconsiderate or irresponsible at best.


They would only get my benefit of the doubt if I hadn’t mentioned the noise level issue regarding other neighbors.

Some people may try to justify their actions by saying “we’re not yelling and screaming” on the patio. But anyone with common sense knows that 8 adults conversing on a patio are not going to do it at a whisper level.

How did they react when you asked them to break up the party?


That’s just rude. I’d put in my house rules no parties and quiet after x in the patio.


I don’t think you are over thinking this. I think it’s a common sense thing. If it had just been a couple of extra friends, I would probably let it go. But, eight people? That’s extreme. My advice would be to reviewing them exactly the way you explained it here. That they were great guests except for that one minor issue. And, then my only question for you would be how did they respond when you politely asked them to break it up. Were they apologetic, or did they give you attitude? I think the answer to that question should determine how harsh your words should be in the review. We all have lapses in judgement from time to time. It’s how you recover from them that really defines your character (and in this case, the kind of guest you are likely or liable to be).


They broke up the party within 10 minutes, so no hassle. I just thought it was then a little weird that they didn’t text to let us know they were leaving in the morning or apologize. I feel like their trip ended on a bad note.


Thanks everyone for responding! I really appreciate your words and support. I think when I review them I’ll send a private note explaining that AirBnB hosts, like hotels, are liable for additional guests and that in the future it would be prudent to ask their host permission before inviting unregistered guests onto the property.


Do most guests text when they are leaving? Mine are told to and some don’t - I am always left wondering if they had an issue, etc.

If 99% of your guests communicate when they are leaving (and they chose not to) then they probably resent you for what you asked. But that is not your problem. They may try to slam you in a review. But you don’t have to leave them one to initiate them leaving you one. Just make sure they don’t slam you at the last minute with a review…and then you have no time to leave one.

I have had guests leave on a bad note…but it was their choice. One guest outright lied and said they were letting their kid take a last few rides on the backyard zip line. Total lie. They hadn’t even begun loading the car. I guess they forgot about all the security cameras outside. I finally texted back and said housekeeping was trying to pull in but saw cars there. All of a sudden the whole family comes out with suitcases trying to load up the car. And then the guy let’s his kid out back to start riding the zip line. Unbelievable.


I don’t bother with the private note personally. They’ll get the picture from your review. It needn’t be emotionally stated, just really straightforward. ‘Guests were friendly and left the studio apartment tidy. The last night there was an unexpected party, but they were responsive to our requests to break it up for the sake of our neighbors’.

Should do the trick, but I understand you trying to be helpful. A lot of people recommend that if you are concerned they may have been irritated their little soirée was broken up, that you review on the last day at the latest moment, so they are no reminded by air to review you to see it, and reveal any remarks that are less than five out of five. If we aren’t there to see guests off many don’t text to say thanks. I used to think it was so rude and was always convinced a bad review was in the offing. No! Just busy young people that didn’t even think about it. Stellar reviews. I tend to be the first to message and thank them for the visit if I didn’t see them off anyway these days (if I enjoyed their visit).


In reference of the review, please be honest of them not informing you they were having people over. They told you it was just going to be the two of them. I understand your hesitation about the situation since you didn’t have it in your house rules. But you could say something about it.


Michelle, if you are new here you might not have heard my story of the Worst Guest Ever. I also have a self contained studio separate from the house and with its own patio. She did exactly what your guests did only it was some local dude they met at the beach. (I could hear their conversation) It was a loud party just with three. I also had to go down and tell them to be quiet and they were snitty with me… all they did was close all the doors and continue to get louder and louder. I heard things get slammed around I heard the water pumping almost constantly for hours… (why?!!) “We’re just trying to have fun,” she told me. Mind you it was on a school night, when all my neighbors retire early. I was so stressed out and livid I opened a case with Air right then so it would be on the record. The local dude (I checked out his car) was walking back and forth to his car to get things… (drugs? Condoms? who knows!!) It looked like they were planning to have him stay. At that point I messaged her that he could not stay… When they checked out, the room was in a shambles.

You have to leave an honest review for your guests. Whether it was in the house rules or not it was bad judgment to just have a party on your property without clearing it with you or mentioning it! You can leave a review at the last minute… Find out the time of expiration in their time zone. That will be the last minute they could answer. Sometimes it won’t work in your favor and sometimes it will. It usually does for me because Hawaii is next to the last time zone in the world (We are near dead last to celebrate New Year’s.)

If you are interested, here is the review I left for my worst guest ever. I used up every possible word of the review, had it ready ahead of time and at the last minute of the review period, I let it fly. Although I have since changed the rules to not allow additional people, just after this incident, I got "nice"guests who allowed a third person to stay over and apologized for it when I mentioned it to them. I should have charged them for it but didn’t. They also clogged up my sink with pineapple (WHO PUTS PINEAPPLE IN A DISPOSAL!!!) AND lost snorkel gear because their “guest” wasn’t careful with it. I left no review for these dummies, only because they were nice and apologized and paid for the snorkel gear.

This is now my second visible house rule: “Only your authorized party of two allowed on property or in the studio.”

Here’s the Jennifer review. As you can see I didn’t mince words. No one will ever rent to this idiot on AirBnB again.

Review for Jennifer

I’ve been doing this a long time (five years) and have hosted hundreds of guests, 99.99% good. But Jennifer was easily the WORST guest experience I’ve ever had. Upon inquiry, she described her party as “quiet professionals,” but that would prove false. My problems with Jennifer began before she even arrived. Originally booking 14 nights during my high season, Jennifer wrote about a month before arrival asking to alter due to “business reasons.” She would only be in Hawaii five days… So I changed her reservation from 14 nights to 4 nights because I DO understand plans change. However, later I caught her in a lie when she let it slip later that she had actually been at the “Waikoloa Marriott” on points for those 10 nights. I lost $1000 in rental income because I was never able to re-book that time block. Lying is definitely not a good start. When they arrived, it was clear they had not read a word of the guest instructions. They were surly and unpleasant. They seemed irritated because I’d told them it wasn’t possible to check in hours early as they had asked. They complained the room didn’t have adequate light (although there are 6 lights), demanding that I install stronger light bulbs, ordering me around like a scullery maid: “That needs to be fixed right away.” Jennifer’s friend was especially rude and insulting, almost contemptuous. But worse was to come. One night I noticed a stranger arriving at my house. This guy, a local dude, as per his local car, headed downstairs to party with the ladies, reaching really loud levels, drinking and laughing obnoxiously. I heard him ask, “Get ahold of any weed while you’ve been here?” At 9:45pm I asked them to quiet down, reminding them of my quiet time house rules. I felt like a pesky RA busting a freshmen rager. They did not really comply. They simply closed all the windows and doors and carried on partying. They flushed the toilet 25-30 times during the party, when my rules clearly request water consciousness. At about 10:30PM I messaged Jennifer to be clear that this guy could NOT spend the night. He finally left about 1:00AM. I was extremely distressed and appalled at Jennifer’s judgment in hooking up with some stranger and inviting him to my home to party without even consulting me. Upon check-out, Jennifer left dirty dishes, trash, unplugged lights and furnishings in disarray and not moved back. Someone damaged my brand-new $300 table. They’d moved it around, so when I moved it back to its original position, the support holding the drop leaf broke off right in my hand. She denied damaging it, but when I handed her the keys to the apartment, my table was in perfect condition. Now it is broken. These so-called “quiet professionals” used my home like a frat house, invited strangers over, partied hardy, left a deplorable mess and caused damage in excess of her deposit. They disrespected me, my neighbors, my home and my house rules. Terrible, stressful and nervewracking experience.

March 2015


No, not in that case. Bringing drinkers onto your property, and 8 of them, that puts you at great liability. That isn’t rude, it is dangerous and breaks every Air BnB rule there is. Just tell the truth. “They were nice folks for the whole stay, but one night they brought a party of drinkers home to the property, and I had to send them off.” FACTS. Stick just to fact. Make no judgement, just reveal the fact.


Yup, agree with sticking to the facts, and I would skip the part about them being nice. I would say , “I was disappointed and dismayed when x began partying loudly on our property with 7 or 8 strangers without obtaining permission from us.”

There is no sugar coating this one.

Your guests blew it. They did the crime, now have to do the time.

Nuff said.

I would wait to review them until the last minute (midnight in the guest time zone) to leave a review. It might be earlier in Your time zone however.

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