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Guests not saying Hello


#1

Hi! I’m a little new at this. My partner and I are hosting in our spare bedroom and currently have our 10th set of guests.
The problem is, they won’t talk to me.
They spend time in the room or bathroom and only come out ‘when the coast is clear’ and even when being in the lounge with them yesterday they refused to acknowledge me.
This is the second set we have had like this, both the same demographic.
Is this normal practice? I don’t expect conversation, but you are staying in my home, please at least look at me and say Hello.
Any suggestions or insights?


#2

You say the she demographic… how are women treated by that demographic? Are they doing their cultural thing?


#3

It may be a cultural thing I am not aware of, but they have both been sets of youngish girls travelling together.
Maybe just unaware of how they come across? Maybe uncomfortable staying in someones home?


#4

Some people just don’t speak much to others all ages, demographics, cultures, religions…I taught school for 28 years and met 1000s of people. Sometimes people are insecure about their accents or lack of ability to speak English. I’ve had fellow teachers and administrators walk right by me in the hall without speaking or making eye contact even if we were the only ones there. I learned not to take everything personally.

Edit: youngish girls may be shy or insecure or uncertain of protocol in a strangers home.


#5

THere are many people who a) just aren’t yet accustomed to the home sharing concept and/or b) aren’t used to the Airbnb culture and are, basically, shy.

I agree that it’s pretty rude to not even say hello to you but sometimes guests are naturally reserved. Our rentals are separate apartments and if a guest has used self-check-in, rather than being greeted by me, then often they don’t speak to me at all during their stay, despite our paths crossing regularly. I’ve had guest deliberately pull their hats down over their eyes to avoid eye contact! Some people are basically shy. Or, as @Debthecat says, it might just be a cultural thing - not anything that you’re doing wrong :slight_smile:

Just consider that some guests are just grumpy people!


#6

Thanks guys, that makes me feel a bit better about it all.


#7

Some folks prefer little to no communication. I am one of those people. Renting a room out doesn’t mean you have to say hello or talk to anyone. They pay for the service you render, not to say hello.


#8

It’s hard not to take it personally when you’ve opened your home to them, the very least they could do in return is hi, bye and a smile. That’s not difficult no matter how shy, tired or busy you are. Manners are free.


#9

I have to say, if you choose to stay in a shared space with a host in residence, I think you are somewhat obligated to be polite. Polite includes saying hello. It might even include telling a story of your day when you come home in the evening, but that is just getting nit-picky.


#10

Right. To walk by and not say hello when you are in someone’s home is just plain rude,


#11

The other group that was similar was in my home for three days and I didn’t see them once. They only ever rocked about the house when I was out of eye contact. It made me feel a bit uncomfortable, but I know I can’t force people to talk to me, or acknowledge me even when I am less than a meter from them. :joy:
I don’t expect a review from them and I guess there are worst things than being ignored!


#12

Just to clarify, do you say “hi” to them first and they don’t respond…or do you mean they never initiate a greeting or acknowledgement? Are they of another culture, perhaps Asian?

If so, maybe they think it’s respectful to keep out of your way and refrain from conversation…who knows.

…but heck, they should at least bow! … :rofl:


#13

Many years ago when I stayed in the Imperial Palace Hotel in Tokyo I liked that the staff did not expect me to make chit chat about my day but just turned and bowed silently with eyes cast down until I walked past. I found it very refreshing that somewhere in the world I was treated with the respect I deserved by hotel staff and not like a long lost friend. :japanese_goblin:


#14

As a host who lives in the same house as our guests, albeit not sharing any living spaces, I would find it very rude if a guest didn’t even say hello or smile if we passed on the stairs or in the hall. I know not everyone is sociable or necessarily has English (my language) as their language but this situation would make me feel extremely uncomfortable. I don’t need a full on conversation, just a little politesse :blush:


#15

Yes, I always offer a Hello, and if it the first time I have met them I try and introduce myself. You are in my home and I presume you would prefer to know I’m not a creep.
Unless I am a creep and don’t know it yet!


#16

It could be a serious case of Anxiety. Something that many have these days and it’s getting worse. I was hosting this couple who has a pretty serious Instagram account and they were “so cool” and “friendly” and everything was fun and awesome, at least on their videos. Every time I called to discuss something it was a one side convo. Never even asked me how you doing. It happens. Does it make them bad people? No.

What can you do? Not everyone has to be nice just because he’s staying at your place (at least that’s what they think) as long as they are respectful to your place.


#17

I’m sure you’re not a creep - and I agree it’s got to be an awkward and unpleasant situation, especially in your own home. (harrumpf!)

I can’t imagine what it must be like to walk around in a shared space not looking at or speaking to your housemate and scurrying into one’s room…Oh, wait a minute…isn’t that the ritual prior to divorce?!

(heh-heh) I knew it sounded familiar.


#18

So many people these days, especially the under-forties (okay, a generalisation) are brilliant at communicating online. But not in reality.

I sometimes think that as hosts we concentrate on communicating via the app and forget the real face-to-face stuff! :wink:


#19

Bahahahaha, I can relate to that.
So glad I’m single. Getting divorced was the best thing I ever did. :rofl::grimacing::laughing::laughing::joy: :dancer:


#20

Yes! I’ve seen this a few times already with young guests. How they were the “coolest” via email but when it came to the phone I had better luck talking to a vending machine.


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