Clean, quiet guests, but odd (inappropriate?) behaviour

I’ve been delaying writing this review. With one day left, and still not knowing precisely what to say, I thought I might ask for other opinions…

My guests were quiet and left the space clean and tidy upon departure. However, they did do something that I would consider to be odd, maybe even inappropriate (?).

To provide some context:

Our listing is a former open-plan living area, which we converted to a studio-like setup. Bathroom facilities are shared, and outside the listing itself in our hallway. You walk through our home to enter it. It’s clear that the space is part of a larger home, which we live in, and it’s listed as a ‘private room’.

Our listing looks out onto our back garden, however we don’t offer access to it. While we don’t explicitly say ‘no back garden access’ in our listing, we didn’t mark it as an amenity. There is also no door to the back garden, so I presumed that doing so would be unnecessary. However, one of our guests climbed through a window to access it. It was unexpected.

The first time they did this, they shouted ‘hello?’ to see if anyone was about. I heard this from my bedroom, which has French doors opening out into our back garden. I didn’t reply, as I assumed it was someone talking on the road that runs beside our home. However, I then I saw my guest wandering around my back yard. He ran over to our garage, which is a bit of a mess, as it’s where all our surplus renovation materials are stored, and is an undercover area we hang our laundry sometimes. It’s also an area pending improvement on our property. I can’t say I was pleased to have a guest see it in that state. Then he went back inside.

He went out a second time during his stay, within an hour or so of the first incident. We have a fence that is over 2 meters high, running from the side of our house to the fence surrounding our property (shared with our neighbour). My guest decided to climb over this fence, going from our back yard into our front. I have no idea why - for fun, I presume. My daughter, whose bedroom is at the front of our house, opposite this fence, heard him climb over and saw him run past her window. Shortly before this, my daughter said his partner went and opened our front door. She heard her call out her partner’s name, and that’s when he jumped over the fence, going over it to re-enter our home via the front door.

I don’t necessarily know what to write about this. I wasn’t happy about what occurred. I personally feel that, if you have to climb out a window to get into the back garden, it’s an area you should realise is not intended for you to use. The behaviour was unexpected and odd, but not malicious. Curiosity leading to what I feel is inappropriate behaviour isn’t something that I would want to leave out of this review, despite these guests otherwise being ok.

What would you say?

I can see why you are annoyed and conflicted over what kind of review to leave. However, I would say that you should have dealt with this immediately the first time that it happened. Is there any reason why you didn’t? It sounds like you don’t have much interaction with your guests which is fine but you have to be assertive over your property and ensure that guests know upfront what is ok and what is not. I think you should make it clear in your tour of the accommodation what is accessible and what is not. How else are guests supposed to know?

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WHY did you not confront this sort of behavior?? Climbing out windows!!! Sheesh! Once is more than enough. YOU are at fault here as much as they are. You allowed them to think this was appropriate behavior How young (and brain dead) were these guests?

Give them a truthful, polite and accurate review:

“Guests were quiet and left the space clean and tidy. HOWEVER climbing in and out of windows to access fenced off areas of the property is NOT appropriate or acceptable behavior under any circumstances, and I cannot recommend these guests to other hosts!”

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@KenH is right. I was being polite and giving guests the benefit of the doubt. Climbing over fences on someone’s property is not ok and you shouldn’t have to point it out. Most normal people would understand that fences are there for a reason, as in KEEP OUT. But many people are not very bright and do strange things. It never hurts to point out the obvious. I do this regularly with all my guests and make it light-hearted (eg. “I’m sure you know but the shower curtain goes INSIDE the tub so that the floor doesn’t get flooded with water” ha ha).

The booking was for one night. After I saw one of my guests wandering around our back garden, I didn’t immediately go outside to ask what he was doing because it was, understandably, an odd position to be put in. When he went back inside after a few minutes I considered speaking to him about what happened. At the time, I was caring for a terminally ill family member, who needed constant supervision. Being preoccupied, I decided I would do so only if something further occurred. I only found out about the second incident the following day, when they checked-out.

I completely agree that hosts should be assertive and set boundaries. However, I also know that curiosity leads to poor judgement sometimes. When we have guests arriving late, we often use a lock box. Frequently, guests will go around trying to open other doors in our home, including our bedroom doors, despite clear instructions being given about where their room is, and communal areas, prior to arrival. I’ll always comment about incidents like this in private feedback, and intended to do so in this instance, too. But knowing about the second I feel that my guests should have known better.

At least he was clothed!

I admit when I first imagined this man climbing out of windows and jumping fences, I had this vision of a man with droopy underwear, some slumping socks and nothing else.

I have no idea how you would write up this behavior as part of a review. I mean who has a rule “Don’t jump out the window.” But, it is odd behavior so it seems an omission to not mention it in some way.


I’m trying to picture this - so bizarre. What age person was it? Like a young kid?

Please do mention it. “These guests were quiet and left the space clean and tidy upon departure. However, I found him accessing my back garden, which isn’t shared space, by climbing in an out of the window in the roomm and then climbing over the fences in my backyard. While I don’t understand why he was doing this, the behavior made me uncomfortable”

Agree with everyone. You’re right that this was odd behavior, and you should be concise but specific in the review. In person i would have confronted and said in a very friendly way something like ‘Looks like you took a wrong turn and somehow wound up in the garden, which is not part of the guest space. Were you looking for something and get lost? Is there anything you need? … Okay…just let me know, and I’ll be happy to help.’

In the review, I’d say you found it odd that you saw the guest climbing through windows to access non-shared spaces (just like DC said). All you need to say. Don’t need all the context. As a host if I saw ‘climbing through windows’ I would immediately rule this person out as a potential guest. He might as well have been swinging from a chandelier.


To me this doesn’t indicate that these are bad guests, just that you have to be clearer the next time. Put it in a private message to them.

I understand. I have double privacy gates and a clearly private garden area that leads to my side of the house where I live and my entry to my apartment is. And My car is parked at my gate.
Although nobody has climbed out a window, ( yet - that I am aware of ) at least once a Year I get a guest who manages to pass through 2 gates and enter my private space to “have a look see around”, or even to come through obvious private owner space to attempt to access my private entry door. Last year my dog was let loose once.
Some seemingly normal people lack boundaries and common sense and can’t perceive it is not ALL FOR THEM. Even when told, and shown. Even when in contract and repeated in house instructions. There is always somebody who does not listen and does not read…at some point they show up.
The last time I nicely reigned in a guest, it backfired and they gave me a 3 star review.
I avoid confrontation at all costs. I just shake my head and move on.


This reminds me of my Italian guest who thought he got an entire apartment with a kitchen for $50 a night. Even though my dinner guest and I vacated the kitchen, went out to visit on my back patio and left T. and his wife the kitchen and dining room I still got knocked down a star. I guess if I’d said, “No sorry, no kitchen!” It would have been a 3 star or worse.

Although I didn’t mind leaving them to the kitchen, people opening gates and windows to access my private space would be off limits. I’m not going to give up my privacy for a star.

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Thank you - what you’ve written sounds perfect. I’ve edited it a little and used it. I hope that’s okay?! :slight_smile:

Oddly enough, they were young professionals, perhaps in their early to mid 30s.

Of course it’s ok to edit! Make it your own; it was just a suggestion.

Yeah, I’m still shaking my head. @GutHend is a very flexible host. I could not tolerate it. Without all the other issues involved, he could easily have damaged the window.

You’ll look back on this one day and laaaaaaugh!

Without a doubt I am lacking certain experiences: Guilty!
And a little bit naive: Guilty!

We only very recently started our mini BnB and our concept is a shared one, where guests can share all our spaces except for our bed- and bathroom. We only have a small apartment, it’s the only option for the moment. But even if we had a huge place, I wouldn’t be like _“Well we have a lovely, beautiful, big house here, and you (the guest) can stay in the corner over there and don’t leave your corner.” Without judging anyone (!!!) I like to spend time with my guests and share. For me that is the concept of a B&B, or at least the kind I want to have. OK, you don’t have to share everything, but why keep the best to yourself and give the leftovers to your guests?

And then, when someone says “garden-small window-no access”, I immediately think: Why? Put in a French door, put down a small guest terrace with a small hedge around it, a bistro set,… Make your guests happier and charge more. LOL.

And thinking about it again, probably it is quiet strange for someone to climb through the window. But people make mistakes, there wasn’t anything damaged, there isn’t proof of bad intentions. There is proof of at least bad judgement, but is that a reason to publicly put someone in his spot? Not for me… For the moment at least, maybe in the future we will have a laugh about my naivety. :innocent:


Well I wish you all the luck in the world! We also share - though the guest space is on a different level they come upstairs for breakfast. Meeting new people is a lovely part of hosting.

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Flexible is one thing. Bad behaviour and not knowing your limits is another.

Climbing out your window is NOT acceptable on so many levels. Period. (Well, unless there was a fire.) If they didn’t learn how to behave when they were growing up a review stating this odd behaviour may make them think twice in future. Sheesh!

I’m sorry you had to experience this.

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One of the great things about airbnb is they are all different. If someone has a fence and no door and a listing that says “no garden access,” the guest should respect that. I started out with a room in my home and said they could use the kitchen and laundry and patio and grill. I now have made extensive additions to give both myself and the guest more privacy.

Why the change? First, I can’t charge enough to make it worth my time to keep the whole house, yard and patio clean to the standard I would want if guests were using it. Second, the interactions with people can become exhausting and time consuming. I like people and am very social. But I’ve had times where I just had to tell guests, “time to go!”

I hope you only have wonderful guests who never abuse your hospitality but many of us have discovered that if we want to last a long time doing this guests need boundaries.


The best attitude! It just shows though that with every set of guests, we learn something new - about human nature, if not about hosting. :slight_smile:

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