Child came to visit, but did not spend the night

Lesley booked the reservation for 1 guest. However, she did not spend the night. Marvin, her boyfriend, slept here. (1 guest). However, most of the time Lesley and Marvin were both here during the day. That’s 2 guest. And twice Lesley, her son and Marvin were here. That’s 3 guest and one being a child of approximately 7 years old. My Guest rules state my 1 guest room is not suitable for children. And generally, I do not book local people who already live in town.

So I feel I was duped, because there was more than 1 guest here a lot of the time, and because my house rules let guest know upfront I’m not set up for children to stay here. The caveat, was only Marvin actually slept here overnight. Any thoughts on how I should have handled this situation? Should I mention that absolutely no children at anytime, even if they did not sleep here? Should I have informed Lesley to have Marvin register instead of her? Should I have collected more money for the extra people?

“No visitors without prior permission due to insurance and liability “
In your house rules and discussed on arrival.

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I’d imagine that you’d do whichever of those things made it better for you. But if you didn’t do any of them, then that’s okay too. Did it all turn out okay in the end or are they still there?

So this scene just went on in your home and you didn’t speak to them about it, just acted like it was normal?

Successful homesharing requires hosts not being afraid to simply speak to their guests if something is bothering them about the guests’ behavior, whether it’s them leaving a mess in a shared bathroom or kitchen, coming home late and noisily and thereby waking up their housemates,etc.

As a homeshare host myself, this would have been my communication with Lesley, from square one:
“Lesley, I’m confused by what is going on here. You may not have realized this, but the person who books has to be the person who stays, and the people who are using the accommodation have to be accounted for on the booking. You booked this room for yourself, not for Marvin, and you didn’t give any indication that the three of you were planning to spend time together here. This is my home- I provide accommodation for paying guests, it’s not a meeting place for families, and I feel disrespected in having assumptions made that you didn’t need to inform me of your intentions. I’m sure you didn’t mean to be disrespectful, but we now need to figure out how to move forward with this.”

As to how to handle a situation like this beyond the conveying of the info that what they are doing isn’t okay, different hosts might handle it differently. Some might not mind these folks spending some time together, as long as it was just brief visits, not them all using your hot water, toilet paper, towels, etc, as long as that intention was disclosed when the guest asked to book and approved, some might adjust the price on the booking to accommodate the added usage, some hosts might not want more than the person to booked to enter the home.

When I found out after she had arrived that one of my guests was in town to see her son and grandkids, was having to visit them at the mom’s place, where the kids were living, and that she and the mom didn’t get along, I told her she was welcome to have the kids over sometimes if she wanted, as I live in the countryside and there would be plenty of nice things for the kids and her to do outside. She didn’t take me up on it, but I offered because she seemed really distressed with the situation at the mom’s place (said it was really dirty and chaotic).

However, when a single female guest brought a male friend back one night without asking me, I put a stop to that right away.

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Sorry, I missed that it was a homeshare, that’s different for sure.

Just leave it and move on.

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I think the OP was looking for advice on how to best handle a situation like this if it ever happens again.

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the problem is, these situations rarely happen exactly the same way again. always slightly varied with different reasons why the guest feels justified in doing what they want.

and we hosts too might be in a more generous mood, or super cranky cos the previous guest stole the blanket, cushions and whisky glasses…

Probably i would echo others who suggest having strong rules set up beforehand that the guest must agree to.

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I’m surprised you accepted a third party booking in your home and have multiple guests including children visit without querying it with the booking guest @annette1881

What was your thinking around this?

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Take Debthecat’s advice for the future. Forget this stay if no harm was done and they have left. If the person is at all new to Airbnb I would privately point out the issues, but I wouldn’t charge anything. If they are still there you have to decide if you are going to ask them to leave and chance Airbnb backing you. You may wish to block this person from future stays but get the boyfriend’s name so he cannot circumvent this and book under his name.

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Thank you for your comments. This was very helpful. I feel much better prepared moving forward on how to handle my guest. Thanks again.

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That’s quite true, but there are general categories that situations tend to fall into. This one encompasses third party booking, guests assuming they can invite anyone to either come visit or stay, and poor communication.

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Do you want to consider your rules saying:

Anyone entering the property, whether overnight or not, must be a registered guest. The person booking the reservation must be an overnight guest and the person checking in for the first night.

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That’s a great idea. I just need to spell in out in the rules clearly, so that there is no guess-work!!

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Did not realize this was in your own home as you did not make it clear (until I read the responses). That is a very important difference you should specify up front.

She didn’t state “homeshare”, but her repeated use of “here” and “my one guest room” made it evident to me that it was.