It’s confusing because there are two intertwined issues - the 3rd party booking and the sexual impropriety. Some posters have commented more on one aspect than the other. My personal take has been that the original poster made a few small mistakes which had unfortunate results, but that her reaction to the event has been strange and focused in a weird way that seems very attention-getting.
It has been explained repeatedly that this was not a third party booking. A woman booked for two guests, the offensive man being one of the two guests. The woman then revealed that she didn’t plan to stay.
Why do you believe that the offensive behavior has anything to do with the guest being third party? When I had a guest hit on another guest, he was the person who made the reservation.
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The thing is, @EllenN, that the OP doesn’t make it clear. She says that she thought that they were coming as a couple. Or did she say at some point that the booking was for two people? This topic has grown so quickly that I might have missed it.
Why do you believe that this behavior wouldn’t have happened if he had been the registered guest?
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Oh my goodness! Reading this just answered my own post about doing charitable pricing!
Okay, I should stop that…
M
I don’t. It’s pretty obvious to anyone that various behaviours that are not acceptable can also performed by registered guests. This very forum is proof of that and I’m sure we all have experiences we could tell.
That’s the point I’ve been trying to make. So why are people telling the original poster that it’s her fault that this happened to her because she permitted a third party booking?
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I don’t think they are, are they? I think that what most are saying (sorry, I’m not going to read the entire thread again!) is that because she only allows single men who are very carefully vetted, then she was quite within her rights as regards the Airbnb TOS to refuse him entry when he arrived. It seems that with hindsight, she probably agrees.
But she says she thought he was part of the couple that booked. I get couples all the time where I don’t know the other’s name until they arrive here!
Artemis - I think what she was trying to say is that if she refused this person to check in, and Audrey (the guest) had cancelled, then she would have lost out on 3 nights of a 4 night stay. With the flexible policy that is what would have happened. After guest checks in they can get most nights refunded.
I have posted multiple times on this board about how Air was doing A/B testing last year and NOT allowing hosts the opportunity to switch to a strict cancellation policy. Once you turned on moderate or flexible…the strict option was removed! I thought this was done with…but maybe not with all hosts.
I called multiple times just to see what the “latest” response would be…and each rep. danced around the issue. This is the same A/B testing that is done with not allowing some new hosts to sign up for anything other than “instant book.”
This is the same A/B testing that is being done on my property right now when I only show up in random search results. I was also part of an A/B test where I wasn’t shown if the guest was booking within 7 days of arrival…only instant book properties were shown. I “thought” my current issue was resolved this morning…but another fellow host (thank you) just showed me I am back to square one.
So I don’t know the poster’s cancellation policy…and yes (I do agree with you) that it did strike me as a bit odd that she didn’t specify which one - but for now I have no reason to hold that against her.
I hate it when threads turn into blaming the victim.
I have no trust that Airbnb would have paid out at all. I don’t know how many of you all are willing to pull out your check book and write out a check for $750 - I sure wouldn’t. I would have done the same as the OP and just hoped for the best.
But her post is helping me yet again learn about policies that nobody here is even sure about. All the reps. just decide what they want. How many of you literally would have cancelled the original guest (who’s friend showed no initial harm) ?? I doubt many of you would have!! Especially if Air “might” just cancel Audrey’s reservation on my behalf and try to reward me with no payout and “oh we won’t penalize you.”
Now I know if this ever happens to me then I will tell Air that Audrey’s reservation holds, and she is welcome to come stay…dates are still open for her. And I will try to call the police; Young punk Air kids cannot remove a person from your home.
And many drunken males are complete loose cannons. You sometimes do just have to try to listen to their stupid, disgusting stories just to try to dissuade the situation. I know that male men can be set off to the point of punching someone in the face and having their teeth knocked out.
So it’s not always as easy as just “excusing yourself” and asking him to go to bed. I am not a tiny woman, and I have a big mouth…and I have also been around some crazies to know when to shut my mouth up and just placate…because in essence - sometimes placating is protecting yourself from missing teeth and broken bones.
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Yes…this exactly. You are one smart cookie 
. We can all learn from the shenanigans of sneaky guests and this post is giving us an excellent lesson. The key as hosts is to fine tune our ability to think on our feet and ALWAYS work within the TOS.
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Cabinhost always says the right thing!!! 
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That’s not exactly true. My partner of 16 years is a recovering alcoholic. I’ve lived through many hard years with him. I know first hand the effects severe alcohol abuse can have on a person. Maybe thats part of why drunk people don’t intimidate me. Anyway, this isn’t about me… I’m just glad this thread seems to be winding down so we can go on to the next. lol
The man revealed that the woman allowed him to use her account because he didn’t have any reviews and she did. Totally different scenario. The woman never intended to stay there. So that sounds like it meets the criteria for 3rd party booking. It probably also meets the criteria for fraud, but that might be a different topic.
The reason this is so important is because of your second question -
The offensive behavior itself was not caused by the irregular booking. But the response to it ties the two together…
It’s not spelled out clearly in the original post exactly what the host said when she called Airbnb, just that she felt they blamed her. It’s entirely possible that Airbnb sees this as a 3rd party situation, they think the host violated TOS and so they aren’t going to do anything about the situation. They don’t really have any power to remove someone from the house anyway, especially if it’s someone different from the registered guest.
If you have a registered guest and they cause a situation, then Airbnb (hopefully!) will side with you and help get the matter resolved. Therein lies the difference.
These types of situations are things that can happen to any of us, and so again I want to stress that it’s not the situation that really bothers me, it’s the reaction. Being informed is always useful, and using the tools available are always a good idea.
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So let’s boil this down for everyone’s benefit -
What should she have done - what should we all do in this situation -
A. Be ready to lose the income for peace of mind. Easier said than done for many, I know.
B. Know what your standards are, write them down - ie: no single men, etc. Then stick to it.
C. When you find out you have been defrauded, which seems to be the case, contact airbnb immediately. Tell the guest to leave. (see ‘A’ above)
D. Understand that airbnb may not be able to help you if a guest is being creepy and gross. See ‘A’ above. Be ready to cancel and evict.
E. Behavior like this would be shocking. We have ALL been cornered by gabby guests and had difficulty extruding ourselves. Imagine when the person is freaking you out and you just do not know what to do to keep everyone safe from this deranged guy. Have a plan, especially if you host in your home. See ‘B’ above. What will you overlook, what is a deal-breaker for you? Thinking through this ahead of time will help us make better decisions.
It seems like the issue was the OP was not willing to lose the money. She may have had very good reason for this - but in the end - that’s what she needed to do - cancel the reservation immediately because of his behavior. Or, as soon as she realized that the woman who booked was not going to show.
Stinks to lose much-needed income, but, we have to decide in advance what we will do when faced with such things.
Anyone have any other helpful advice to add? I for one would like to know.
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I don’t believe that there is a series of i dotting and t crossing that can guarantee that nothing bad will happen in any given situation. I have had many third party bookings. I’ve only had a problem with one of them and the problem was that they were too needy, not that they were scary. I had a guest who booked under his brother’s account because his account had been cancelled. This was because he lives in New York and had multiple listings. He was a delightful guest. The one guest I’ve had who was creepy booked under his own name. Most of the guests I’ve had who I was happy to see leave booked under their own names. Sometimes Airbnb doesn’t properly vet the guests. I recently had a guest who was seventeen years old. He was too immature to be traveling alone. I called and told the representative that his account should be cancelled until he was eighteen. As his passport was one of his verifications I asked how this could happen. She (lamely) said that he could have copied it in such a way that the date of birth was obscured. I think the problem was either that nobody checked the date of birth or that there was confusion between the American month/day/year and the rest of the world day/month/year.
This woman went through a horrible ordeal. I think it would be nice if we would all support her instead of saying she did something wrong which must have caused it.
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I think many seem to be overlooking the statement that our poor OP DID think she was welcoming one half of the the couple that had booked. It wasn’t until after the guy was already in her house that she realized she was duped and this guy was using someone else’s account duplicitously. So it’s not like she accepted the 3rd party booking knowingly.
Oh, so sorry, I did not intend to imply any of that.
Just that we should think through ahead of time and hopefully be better prepared, to know in advance what we think we would do when faced with similar situations.
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One word of ‘dirt’ to me and he would of been out on his ear. I dont understand why airbnb blamed you. Speak to a manger from air. If it was me, this matter would not be dropped until properly sorted out.
I’ve dealt with drunks and druggies out of their mind and screaming both as a nurse in emergency and in life outside of work. At age 18 I found myself in a nasty situation, went to have drink with a guy, he comes out of the bathroom naked. I didn’t stop to chat, just left. The best thing to do is disengage. I certainly wouldn’t sit there for 30 minutes. She has legs, get up and leave the room. Say you have to pee. .
The greed aspect of this is what makes it harder to be sympathetic. If she was so worried about renting to a single man, she should have not let him in the door, or once she found that it wasn’t a couple, ask him to leave. But I gather she spent most of her energy trying to make sure she got her $$. I’m in a tight spot re money due to health problems for several years, but nothing is worth my safety.
Pouring on the sympathy isn’t going to help anyone to learn to cut your losses if your safety is at risk. It’s also important for people to know to leave the scene if it’s getting weird or scary. There are doors, there is 911. If she was so worried about her other guests, she should have called 911.
The whole town council thing is weird. This is or was a public safety issue, not a matter of municipal services.
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