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Things I Never Thought I Would Have To Put in Print That Guests Have Done


No camping in the parking lot. Only registered guests are allowed on premises. (The condo has a 6 guest limit; their 4 friends stayed in their pickup bed camper & came in to use the bathrooms—sigh)

No swimming in the intracoastal waterway. It is a commercial shipping highway for large vessels like barges and small cruise ships (they don’t have brakes). Also hungry bull sharks and alligators are common.

Use a filter in the drip coffee maker. A supply of filters is in the pantry.


Please do not unlock and open the pocket connecting door.
If you do open the pocket connecting door, please do not go poking under the sound blanket and around the egg crate foam behind the connecting door.
If you do go poking under the sound blanket and around the egg crate foam behind the connecting door, please do not try to open the second connecting door.
It is locked, because, although I like you lots, I do not want you roaming around my living room, and your investigatory activities will drive my dog nuts.
You paid for a separate entrance private suite, stay there.


LOL. I have two doors between me and my suite as well. It’s a traditional hinged door with knob. I can have the knob so that they lock me out of their room or reverse it so I lock them out of the space between the two doors. That space is essentially a closet and I keep the vacuum and steam mop in there. Because Air has an amenity for lock on door I let them lock me out. The second door has the lock that keeps them out of my space. Sometimes I hear them open that door but I haven’t yet hear them trying the second door. Sometimes I forget to lock it but luckily it fits very tightly and makes a lot of noise when opened most of the year (not so much in our short winters). So if anyone tries opening it and I’m home, I’ll hear it and will get a good scare.


No no no no, this one can’t be real!!! :rofl::rofl::rofl::rofl:


Such a great thread, keep em comin’ !!!


Because we live in a townhouse community and are very close to our neighbors (oh, and it looks weird): Please refrain from lengthy, loud telephone conversations before 8AM while wearing only your boxers and “entertaining” yourself in our courtyard. We understand you may wish to have a private conversation away from your work partner, but we don’t want to see this either.

P.S. Our neighbors WILL be outraged and will send photos, regardless of how cute you are.


We have a winner! No one is going to top this.



Yep it is real. 4X (2-different condos) guests have made coffee with no filter so the machines must be throughly cleaned. One coffee pot was ruined. I’ve started advertising that Starbucks is only 1/2 mile away.


@konacoconutz Some people are maybe used to a gold filter that doesn’t require a paper filter to be inserted.
@Annet3176 To prevent this from happening again, would it be an idea to just put a paper filter in it, ready to be used? Or buy a gold filter?


I keep my filters inverted directly on top of the coffee maker to avoid this issue. If you have to move it to make coffee and you don’t use one… there are special places for you


@GutHend Fair statements/questions. In the beginning I used the gold filters. They disappeared. I’m not on site so pre-placing a filter isn’t an option.

I think it is because the coffee maker has a removable filter holder. I’ve replaced one with a cheap, basic coffee maker from WalMart that doesn’t have a removable filter holder. The sad part is the basic coffee maker from Walmart was the same price as the nicer coffee maker from Costco.

@Kathleen Good idea. Unfortunately, when I placed the filters with the coffee cups, guests move them.


Jillthepill-Put that way , it IS negligence. How many of you charge for the bleached-out sheets?


Please do not pee in the bushes even if it’s dark and you think no one is watching. We clearly stated our flat has ONE bathroom. Kindly wait your turn.
Please sleep IN the bed, not on it (this, I’ll never understand)
Please do not allow your children to snoop through our storage area.
Please don’t tell me your pooch is potty-trained when he clearly isn’t. You will be charged for deodorization and cleaning services.
Please don’t blame me when your snarly dog bites me. You both will be escorted off the property should this happen and you will be charged my medical fees. (Yes, this happened and she tried to blame me!)
Please do not pet or feed the cats in the neighborhood. We aren’t their people and neither are you.


Yes, he was a wiener, errr… winner, and I have the painful pictures to prove it. I’ve had a rough couple of hosting weeks, but today’s guests left a lovely note and flowers, so I’m on the mend.


Please do not put your dirty dishes in the cupboard between the clean ones. Same thing for glassware and flatware.
Ladies…during that time of the month, do NOT use bath towels as toilet paper then try to hide them.
If you spill nail polish on the sofa, do not try to hide it by tossing a towel over top. You are not really clever.


I have notes all over my house…and yet I am continually surprised at some guests behavior.
I have framed information (house rules) in the the rooms, bathroom, and kitchen. I send emails with instructions and reminders before and during their stay…and yet there are still those that choose not to read or just don’t care…
Small price to pay to have house bills paid :slight_smile:


We had a phase of this issue with suntan products but it seems to have stopped now. have they changed the products?


Please do not wash beach sand off in the shower. There is a hand shower just outside of the patio.


Please do not hang your wet cloths in the bathroom, turn on the bathroom electric wall heater (to dry your cloths), shut the bathroom door and leave for the day.


Eventually with the spread of smart tech we won’t have to worry about many of these problems of leaving lights on, heaters and ACs on etc. We can just turn them off remotely.

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