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More guests than booked, infants, exceeding capacity and guest swapping (1 for 4!) Did I handle it correctly?

Fight it. Stick to your cancellation policy and demand Air pay you.

@aelilya I cannot understand why Airbnb doesn’t offer guests the option to buy travel insurance! They’d even get a commission, or could self insure and reap all profits.

I’m currently working on doing more direct bookings through my own website. Considering 2-tired pricing for different cancellation options.

I wish I could just buy the insurance FOR the guests and include it in their total.

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NOTHING creates more work than little kids!

I don’t mind hosting them, but it sure is a lot of work to get everything clean again. Sticky food crap everywhere …


They don’t care and it would disrupt their long-standing strategy of guest-centric policies, and over-riding host policies with some frequency.

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Yep! Little chocolate fingerprints on my white lampshades, dried food cemented to the floor, m&m’s crushed into the rug, broken glass table, decor/landscape rocks/bricks out of place, lots of very smelly diaper trash, etc. I love little ones but don’t tell me I’m hosting them for free. No way…not anymore.


What you mean is nothing creates more work than parents who let their children walk around with food and hands that haven’t been washed after eating.

Sticky hands aren’t some natural feature of being a child. I raised 3 kids myself and nothing was ever covered in sticky hand prints, nor have my daughters ever let my grandkids walk around with food.
Food gets consumed at the table and hands washed after eating.


Now there’s an old fashioned concept.

A few years ago (well, maybe a bit than just a few :wink: ) when our daughters were both still at school, it was surprising the reaction from some of their friends who came round for tea after school when they were presented with a table, a chair and cutlery to eat their food with.

It wasn’t a posh setup by any means, it was our big old kitchen table that has even followed us here to Spain and the food was simple, but freshly prepared.

Many of these kids had hardly ever eaten at a table inside the home, and often it was difficult watching how poor their cutlery skills were. They came from diverse backgrounds, some living in social housing, others in 4/5 bedroom massive detached houses with triple garages etc.

After the initial sense of awkwardness wore off, they thoroughly embraced the concept of sitting round a table, eating and having a conversation. I also think they enjoyed a break from the frozen shit that many of them were fed on a regular basis.

From a hosting perspective, that really is the issue; it’s the parents fault, not the kids. I gave up and marked us down as not safe for young children, after having to clean toddler shit from the bathroom wall and greasy, grubby handprints from the LCD TV.



New user here, but have been a host for several years.
I’ve been lucky to have really great guests, but occasionally get some weird requests. I’ve always made it a point to be exceptionally firm while being exceptionally polite on the rules.

If a guest is argumentative about the rules I would firmly emphasize the rules and include the “why” crafted for their best interest. For instance, “I can’t accommodate more than X because the septic system won’t support more than that and I would hate your trip to be ruined by toilets and showers backing up.”

I’m a really agreeable person by nature and had to learn how to disagree without being disagreeable. This is how I’ve been able to keep the touch of hospitality without bending the rules.

I would also emphasize no changes to the guest list within X days of the reservation.

My intent is to get as much of the “communication churn” done before the group arrives on site, when it is far more difficult to end the reservation and part ways.

That said, if you do have to end the reservation, the easiest way to craft that is to firmly state "It appears the listing doesn’t fit your needs and neither party will benefit from continuing the reservation.

One note of encouragement: if they argue, it’s a bad sign. If they don’t respect the rules, they’re not going to respect the property.

Hope this helps.


@muddy Me, too! 4 kids. They knew where food was to be eaten, asked to be excused to wash hands & off they went. We played outside in the mud, got plenty dirty having fun being kids….kids with manners & instilled good sense.

@Deacon, you do sound quite agreeable. You made me smile :blush:

Eating in front of TV was one of several reasons why my father would never allow a TV set in his house (my mother bought one 2 weeks after his funeral). And meals were sit down, with dinner always in the dining room, breakfast always in the kitchen, unless it was someone home alone when we were older. When we were teens we weren’t allowed to answer the phone during meals; my father would always answer it because he was always on call for emergencies at work, with “Please call back later.” very calmly and hang up. When he got a pager he never answered phone calls during meals.

He also thought that except for things like moon landings, that watching TV was a waste of time. He felt that it interfered with tinkering, repairing, and rebuilding our old house, and if he wasn’t doing that he was outdoors hiking, sailing, hunting, fishing, often with us.

But he spent a lot of money on musical instruments, a huge and diverse record collection, and books. We all got great grades without the distraction of TV in the house. We could visit friends or Grandma, who lived in this house a block away if we wanted TV.

My parents had us trained to eat in fine dining establishments by the time we were 5 or 6.

This was partly because Grandma had a huge silver service for 16 (it’s now mine, but has been vacuum sealed with anti tarnish strips for several years, since some pieces cannot go in the dishwasher, and my stainless can), with numerous and interesting kinds of forks, servers, spoons, and knives. As in marmalade spoon (different from jam spoon), cocktail forks, meat knives vs. butter/bread knives, etc.

We loved “helping” Grandma or her sister set all the fancy stuff at holidays, and knew that we had to behave ourselves if we wanted to eat with the fancy stuff instead of sippy cups and plastic dishes at the kiddy table. She loved showing how to set a beautiful table, not quite at the Downton Abbey level, but good enough to serve me well when I became a waiter in a ship dining room 16 years later.


Now we are really off topic…

I have 4 large boxes of a friend’s mother’s china set in my garage. She has tried to give it to every relative she still has contacts for. Young people we know have no interest in that sort of millstone around their necks. Her attachment to it seems odd to me but it is what it is. She currently lives in New Zealand. If fate brings her back to the US permanently maybe I can get rid of it.

Options, that your friend may or may not be ready to consider:

Replacements Ltd may buy it, but they are notorious for finding flaws, and you have to pay shipping both ways if they reject any.

Give one teacup and saucer, maybe with a succulent planted in it, to younger generation members to remember Grandma/Auntie by.

Use it everyday rather than for “good china” occasions, happily remembering those Thanksgiving, etc. dinners. I understand friend doesn’t have access right now.

I have my mother’s china, absolutely not my style – gold rims with red and pink roses scattered about. I use the smaller plates when I have guests for snacks or dessert (I give the guests snacks, I don’t eat the guests.)

My Dad bought it for them in Japan when they were engaged and he was in the Navy during the Korean war. He said the saleswoman demo’d its durability by vigorously banging together two dinner plates.

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She’s said that if she had it she would.

I think it’s one of those things that she thought someone in the family would take when the mom passed away in 2004. A former sister in law stored them awhile then my friend decided she was too flaky to be trusted with it. I think I’ve had it since 2008. Until 2019 it was contained in three smallish boxes. I unpacked it and sent pics at one point. At one point she contacted local dealers than might take it on consignment. I think she may have contacted Replacements as well.

Then friend visited and decided to pack it for shipping. It now takes a space of about 6’ x 2’ x 2’ under a workbench in my garage. So it’s not in the way, per se. It’s more in the way in my headspace.

BTW its a very classic set, ivory with gold trim. As china goes it seems quite inoffensive.


I put a whole “vintage” set on my freebie table in the front yard and it disappeared quick – two people were circling it and negotiated dividing it up between them. So it continued to have a useful life.

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I’m so grateful that one of my siblings wanted Grandma’s china, which I couldn’t run through the dishwasher like my Corelle.

I did use Replacements Ltd. to trade some table knives with loose handles because my mother ran them through the dishwasher for rehabbed ones, along with some damaged spoons and forks (they sometimes use the handles to create pieces that never existed in a pattern).

It’s the Gorham Revere bowls that I never use and should sell. All this silver, locked up with anti-tarnish vapor sealed boxes.

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I have my mother’s china and silverware that I always loved even though it’s really not my style. It gets used when I have guests, but there are never 8 of them. I will never get rid of it. It all sits in my grandmother’s china cabinet.


Here we go! Back on topic. I have yet another “never had a review; profile created 2019” guest who has brought an unapproved guest AND exceeded my house capacity.

I really pondered all the feedback I received and I have incorporated/combined two the most - @Deacon and @ChristineAZ. First, I’m not getting worked up about it. I ALMOST didn’t say anything to them. But then I thought, no, for other hosts and myself it’s important we enforce house rules…they’re there for a reason…BUT I approached them in a quite agreeable manner. I said,” Good evening. It’s come to our attention that you have an unapproved guest in your group, bringing the count to 7, which exceeds our homes listed capacity. We have no interest in disrupting your family weekend or our own, for that matter. That being said, you agreed to the house rules and policies which state additional guests incur fees of $100/night. Also you must take care not to overwhelm the septic system (space out water usage). If it backs up or alarms we have to hold you responsible for repairs/damages. If your group is low key & you leave the house in great condition we will agree to charge $75 for the additional person (plus taxes and AirBnb fees; we can’t control that). Does that sound fair?”

Guest replied immediately with,” Hi Aneka, thanks for bringing this to our attention. the last person just confirmed today. I apologize and we’ll make sure $150 is paid. Thanks for understanding…”

I said thanks and sent a payment request. And because they agreed in the app to pay I feel confident I can get AirBnb to collect if they don’t pay the request.

I’m feeling pretty good about this one & feel I can relax and enjoy my weekend and hope they enjoy theirs (albeit they are short a bath towel set, oh well!) :blush:


To really drag us off topic:

Replacements is a fun/interesting place to visit. Greensboro, NC, USA

It’s about a 45 min drive from my home. I go every October to do gift shopping. You can buy anything from a unique $10 Ornament to a $34,000 diamond bracelet.

They have a massive retail area with of collectibles (Lladro, Lalique, Hummel, caithness, etc.), huge Christmas themed retail area (decorations, China, drink ware, serving pieces), and an oddly interesting China museum.

Well behaved dogs are invited in the store (everything is breakable so no way my brats get to go).


@aelilya , “That being said, you agreed to the house rules and policies which state additional guests incur fees of $100/night.”

What are you renting?

My base rate is around $140/night and I “think” I charge an additional $10 - $20 per night per guest over two.

As I have a $250 cleaning fee on Airbnb ($75 on VRBO) to deter bookings due to the Airbnb sanitizing requirements that I don’t have on VRBO (“I’m renting a house, not an ICU!” was the beginning of my listing description), I was thinking of increasing the per person fee and lowering the cleaning fee on Airbnb.

I’m going to have to take some time to redo my pricing, just shocked to see $75 - $100 that you charge. What is your base price?

It seems more fair to charge more per person that to have that large cleaning fee.

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