Managing expectations

Hey folks,

I just felt about bad about this, but felt I should be firm too… Here’s the convo:

Him: ”Hi Eyeborg,
May I send you a whatsapp message? It’s a link to a video. I think you’ll enjoy it.”

Me: “Hi xxx,
I keep all correspondence on here and prefer to keep it business only.”

Him: ”I understand and respect that, but I thought it was part of the business getting to know each other. After all we’ll stay six days together.”

Me: “I offer a very cheap alternative to a hotel on a full time basis and it takes a lot of time to deal with all the bookings so I can’t chat as well. We will chat when you’re here of course.”

What do you all do when guests want to be best buddies for months before their arrival? This guy’s trip is ages away.

What do you think was in the video?

My prediction is this guy is going to be a problem guest.

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I think I would call Air and get them to cancel this reservation based on you not being comfortable with the guest.

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It sounds presumptuous of him to tell you what you will enjoy, when he doesn’t even know you. And the phrase “stay together” is kind of weird.

Best case scenario, he will be needy and expect you to be around talking to him and entertaining him all the time.

Worst case scenario, he has some fantasy that you two will hook up.

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Yes I did worry a bit about what might be in the video too… so far he has only mentioned his love of classical music, but yeah… maybe I should ask to see the video just to rule out any nastiness and get him cancelled asap if need be.

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Well, you do look very attractive in your profile pic here :wink:

(I’m a grandmother by the way - don’t take that the wrong way!)

Are you both speaking in your mother tongues? The ‘staying together’ does sound a little iffy but if you don’t have a language in common it might be innocent. Yes, I think I’d want to see the video too.

I’ve flagged his message and written to Air that I’m uncomfortable as he’s being over friendly and potentially creepy. I’ve hosted lots of guys so far and nobody has been creepy at all. I think you all gave me the right advice to cancel the guy. We’ll never know what was in the video…

I guess I should change my Air profile photo [not the same as the one on here], it’s not a sexy one at all but I think I need an even uglier one, haha!

The convo was all in English, but he’s Brazilian, very good looking, says he’s a lawyer. It did cross my mind that he was a bit too much of a telenovela fantasy character.

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No reply from Air yet about my flagged message, but I got this message from my guest:

“I’m sorry for this unintended misunderstanding. It really was just a video.
Anyway, one last question. What’s your zodiac sign?”

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Zodiac sign? CANCEL! LOL.

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eww good move cancelling this creepo!

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My instincts are screaming CANCEL!!!

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I’m waiting for a reply from Air. I used the ‘flag message’ feature, but is there a better way? I don’t want a penalty for cancelling the guy myself. Thanks for all the support here everyone!

Yeah, this screams “looking for a hook-up”! Certain cultures watch way too many American movies and have assumptions about young American women. I went to a small Baptist college with a large international student body and I was asked for hook-ups A LOT, especially during welcome weekend and the first week of classes… Some of them actually turned into friends once they learned they were being inappropriate… It’s a learning curve when all you see is movies and think that’s the norm. But I wouldn’t want the learning curve in my home. Let him book a hotel and try his luck in a bar.

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Yep, as soon as I’ve got this resolved with Air I will reword my listing to mention “me and my fiancee” [imaginary in my case] rather than state that I live alone. I’ve already changed my profile pig to the most unflattering, fat and ugly pic I’ve got of myself while still looking civilised, ha!

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I’d message again, in fact I’d call them and explain and have them cancel so you don’t have to keep getting messages and you can open the calendar for another booking.

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BUT YOU SHOULDNT HAVE TO DO THAT!! (But I understand why you have). Anyone who says that feminism has done its job and is no longer relevant is very misinformed. What a crazy world we live in!!

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hahaha.

Do you have a good lock for your bedroom door at night??

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Haha, I just saw my typo, what a fun name for an ugly profile pic! Profile pig is the way forward for me that’s for sure!

I don’t have a proper lock but I can use a rope and tie it around the door handle and a nail I’ve hammered into the door frame. I am usually more scared of being trapped inside in a fire than being attacked myself. I can’t install a proper lock as it’s a rented flat and I’m doing Air on the sly.

And yes, @Geddy3, women shouldn’t have to go to such lengths to protect themselves.

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What you should do is just find a picture of yourself with a brother or your dad and put that as your profile pic. Even though I do 95% of the guest interaction, I have a pic of my husband and I:

and I have it “Andy and Sarah”. I think it shows that we’re fun and upbeat while still setting boundaries. You could totally fake it without having to lie at all, all it takes is a good pic with a guy, lol.

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Yes that’s a good deterrent, will ask my biggest strongest burliest male friend to pose.

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