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Here is my suggestion: Tell the guest “I need your help. Your body or clothes or something are an unpleasant smell to me. Maybe we can determine the source of this unpleasantness and come up with a solution.” So if it’s clothes you can direct her to a laundry/cleaners. If it’s personal hygiene you can direct her to information about bathing and use of deodorant and so on. This doesn’t have anything to do with ethics, there is nothing unethical about telling a smelly person they smell. It’s like telling a blonde person they are blond. The difference is that she is infringing on your comfort. If there is anyone being unethical it’s her. But the kindest thing is to approach it as a problem you need her help to solve rather than making it accusatory.
I didn’t mention the class of Indians. The middle class in India is growing. The farmers, who the majority of don’t have any formal education, have been selling off their land. This has given them the money to educate their children, who are now our IT professionals.
[quote=“KKC, post:41, topic:29017”]
Tell the guest “I need your help. Your body or clothes or something are an unpleasant smell to me. Maybe we can determine the source of this unpleasantness and come up with a solution.” So if it’s clothes you can direct her to a laundry/cleaners. If it’s personal hygiene you can direct her to information about bathing and use of deodorant and so on. This doesn’t have anything to do with ethics, there is nothing unethical about telling a smelly person they smell. It’s like telling a blonde person they are blond. The difference is that she is infringing on your comfort. If there is anyone being unethical it’s her. But the kindest thing is to approach it as a problem you need her help to solve rather than making it accusatory.
[quote=“KKC, post:41, topic:29017”]
Thank you. It made feel better that It’s just the fact that has to be addressed.
such a sensitive topic! In any case don’t say this is America… nothing good can come after that. To be honest, I’d try to get rid of her. In your shoes I would call the customer service. let them handle. and by any means don;t let people instant book you months at a time. who knows who might book you. not everyone gets along. I had some guests i counted the seconds until they left.
I have figured out one scenario how to tackle the issue in my specific case
Do you have a moment to talk?
I appreciate that that you take care of your garbage and clean your room.
This is a bit awkward, and I hope I do not offend you, but… I have noticed there was quite a pungent smell coming from your room. It smells even with the closed door. And I can smell you from my room through the AC ventilation.
I understand that it might be difficult to hear for you and it is a bit embarrassing for me to point to this fact. But I do care about you, and I do not want this affect your future Airbnb rating, as well as relationship at work, and personal life.
Are you aware of the bad smell?
Has anyone ever told you this before? And what are your thoughts on it?
Please be honest with me.
I do not want this negatively impact you in the future.
your company policy also requires all workers to be fresh and clean at work.
I am very sensitive to smell and it affects my well being in my house.
(What to do? How the situation can be improved? )
Maybe we can determine the source of this unpleasantness and come up with a solution.
Take a shower every day not at evening but in the morning. Or both if needed.
Wear your clothes only once
Change bed sheets every week
Covering the scent with sprays will not work: It will worsen my allergy. Synthetic air fresheners and candles is not a solution here.
I think that the only way to change the situation is to improve personal hygiene.
It is awkward but I hope it did not offend you. It was not my intention to come across as rude but the smell is infringing on my comfort.
I think this is a good approach. Maybe there are a few words I would use differently but since English doesn’t seem to be either of your first languages hopefully there will be no offense taken over words. And yes, leave out American. I don’t know why people here are assuming the OP is in the USA anyway.
If the guest doesn’t like to talk much and doesn’t speak well you may need to make all this much shorter.
I was a teacher and many teachers get faced with this same situation. The teacher of course wants to push it off on a counselor, administrator, coach or sponsor but someone has to be the grown up and tell them.
Sorry I thought you had said she hardly speaks. I’m not going to go back to re-read. So she is going to understand you perfectly; neither your spoken or written version has to be perfect.
One QUICK convo ref smell would not be bugging but if she viewed it that way she could cancel and find somewhere else that didn’t bug her. Maybe she intentionally has ban personal hygiene. Or maybe she is depressed…
You said you were talking to airbnb about this. What did they advise?
To be honest, I think this approach is overly long. I would simplify it to make the conversation less difficult for you both. And I wouldn’t call it a bad smell, maybe a pungent smell sounds less harsh.
By the way if she didn’t want to communicate, she should have said in a hotel or in her own place.
As it’s been a couple of days now since you first posted have you spoken to the guest as yet?
may be she has Aspenger. who knows… I let her dig through my bad of stuff that I’m planning to give away or sell and see if she needs sth. she picked perfume and did not say a word about that… not that I expect sth in return or anything, but the simple “thank you. I got this and that” would be polite for a normal person.
Airbnb did not reply. I sent them a message. and to be honest it’s just a check point, that I reported an issue and was looking for solutions, to avoid potential issues.
I still did not have a chance to talk to the guest. we function on different schedules. may be just sending her a message is ok? I know that the best approach is talking in person.
I had a friend for a time who had some real issues. And if she decided she didn’t want to talk, she didn’t. She could walk right past you and look you in the eye as you spoke and not say a thing, go in her room and close the door.
The woman asked not to be “bugged” while she’s a guest and I can see the review now. “Host insisted on bugging me despite our advance agreement.” Then the host is stuck because she’s not going to reply "I only wanted to discuss the issue of you reeking so I didn’t have to cancel the booking.
I wouldn’t be able to stand this situation so long but if you can stand it for 3 days what’s 3 more?
I would be very careful mentioning these issues using the messaging system. I can see some 12 year old CSR squealing discrimination and creating issues. This is a face to face conversation.
I would message her through the system. She is anti social, does not want to talk in person it seems. It is an uncomfortable conversation to have so just message her and be done with it, then you have it in writing if you need to ask her to leave. 3 months is a long time.
I would definitely message her starting out that you are sensitive to smells, and there is an odor coming from her room and self that is distressing andn causing me to have headaches. Possibly it is from a lotion or other body cream or you use ? I need to request you shower daily, wash your hair frequently and change the sheets weekly. If this smell continues I will have to ask you to find somewhere else to live, because it will permenate my mattress and the house.
