How to deal with this ABB neighbor

OK, so I have this house that I rent either to groups or individuals. This neighbor has been a nightmare from the beginning. Ever since I bought the house and fixed it up she would yell and scream at my contractors who dared to step on her property while fixing my house.

This year I installed an AC and she screamed at the guys who were trying to do this, saying they stepped on her property. They were trying to install the AC unit on the 6 yards wide land between our two houses so it was inevitable that thhey would step on her side too. She is just like a hawk, watches from behind the curtain and she storms out screaming. I had the guys install the AC on the other side of the house in order not to deal with the crazy lady.

I think she wrote a letter to the municipality that I am renting so they came and I had to pay a fee to get a permit and had an inspection done. My guests have been nice, I go to great lengths to select them, even if ABB punishes me for not approving 88% or whatever they want.

And here’s my question: yesterday the mailman brought a package that was for the crazy woman to my house. The guest brought it inside. I found it at 8pm when I was there to clean. What to do with the package? I am afraid to step on her property and I most certainly dont want to go to her door. SHe is a freaking nut case. She might have a gun or call the cops! I was thinking about taking this to the post office but I dont have the TIME.

I was thinking about throwing it in the garbage. Should I just toss it to her part of the front yard? What would you do? I’m pissed that because of the mail man’s error I have to deal with the crazy woman.

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label the package ‘wrong address’ and leave it out for your mailperson; it’s their problem.


oh, I was afraid someone might steal it and id be accused. PPl steal amazons boxes.

Be careful. Destroying mail is a crime. I would do what Rolf said.

Or you could look at this as an opportunity to mend fences. Just saying ;-(


So, effectively, you were renting illegally - or have I missed something?


Leave it at another neighbor’s front door. LOL They will take it to her when they realize it’s not theirs.This way you don’t have to deal with the crazy lady.


I needed the inspection because the house in question was foreclosed and the borough didn’t know it was fixed and it was safe to rent it out. When I bought it it was not safe to live in. I had no idea. SO it’s not that I rent it illegally. Taxes are paid every 3 months and the borough got paid in time. they gave me a certificate of occupancy and were looking for things like smoking detectors in every room, hallways, fire extinguishers etc… things that Airbnb only now emphasizes. I rent a room in the house I live in also and I didn’t need anything like this.

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I disagree with some of the suggestions.

The package might be your chance of giving her an olive branch and making friends.

Sure, that might backfire, but it’s worth a try.


I would just give it to her or leave it at her door. She probably won’t shoot you (although I know “probably” is not very encouraging.

Re: olive branch. This may be true. But if she’s really “touched” then she won’t see it that way. For example, a true paranoid would probably accuse the host of stealing it, looking inside and re-sealing etc. So without actually knowing this woman I’m hesitant to give advice.

A story: A fellow dog host in RI was having trouble with a neighbor. There was a complaint to the city and some other issues. My friend built a nice wood fence between them to replace the prior chain link one and sent a large, expensive Edibles basket. There hasn’t been another issue and that was 4 years ago.


Call the delivering post office and tell them they delivered to the wrong house. Then you can work it out with them to rectify their mistake.

I will call the post office, thanks militaryhorsegal. Honestly I’m too busy this time of the year and and I have no intention to be friends with such a woman. I find her erratic behavior really troubling. No sane person acts like this. I don’t want to deal with her at all. We are not even in “hello” terms. I don’t know, everywhere I lived I had very good neighbors and a the occasional weird neighbor, but this lady takes the cake.


I agree with the olive branch thing. And I think that I must be a crazy old lady because if someone is on our property I go out and have a go at them. (Politely usually though!) I expect neighbours to give me notice about any noisy work or any intrusive stuff (such as a work truck parking in our parking lot - it has been known).

A good nosy neighbour can be a good thing for a host. I’d try the olive branch thing first.

“Good fences make good neighbours”. I have a crazy lady neighbour. After one particularly bad session of yelling abuse at me in front of guests I built a brick wall at her end of the terrace. I’ve also planted a “neighbours be gone” lilli pilly hedge along our joint fence so she will lose a good portion of her sea view over my front yard when it grows to full height (about 20 feet should do it :wink: ) At one point the grass around the hedge next to the fence died off suddenly and the line trailed off as the fence height rose so we suspect she tried to poison the hedge plants but round up only kills weeds. Some people :frog:


The “proper” thing to do is label the package “Wrong Address” and stick it in/on you mailbox for the postal worker to discover. Destroying mail is a felony. Leaving it at someone else’s house is just tacky.

My goodness, what a truly depressing thread. It makes me so grateful to have good neighbours and live in an area with a community spirit. It’s not always perfect but we work things out. I can’t imagine being afraid to knock on a neighbour’s door. Maybe you should just try it @adrienne12?


I have to agree with KenH & Rolf if she is that obnoxious, let the postal service deal with it.

I am in the bring it over to neighbors house with a smile on your face. Kill her with kindness. Do not let on that you even notice her grumpy ways.

YOU: Knock knock… Hi there, I am nelly neighbor from next door we have not met yet. This was left at my house by mistake here you go.

Grumpy : oh thank you:)

You: Of course, thats what neighbors do. Here is my phone number if you ever need to give me a call…

Grumpy: Thanks!



wait till she’s out, set it on fire and throw it through her fucking window :slight_smile:

But don’t throw it in the bin, as that’s illegal


I’m afraid of these people. Tonight I saw her husband parking his Audi in front of their house. I was in the car leaving the house. Part of me wanted to stop him and give him the package but it was inside. As someone said she’d flag anyone on her property nicely, this woman was not nice. She saw people on uniform trying to install an AC outside, on my property and occasionally stepping on her freaking side because it’s so narrow not because they wanted something with her. It’s abnormal to come out shouting at them ‘get out of my property’. I will not be the ambassador of peace. She’s a nut case. I have no patience for people like these. I did nothing wrong. I do not share a driveway or anything with them. We have a fence between us. So far I’ve been busy with a deadline at work. Couldn’t call the post office.

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