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AAAGGHH! I can cope with a lot of crap from guests but there’s one thing that makes me incandescent with rage: re-arranging my stuff. I find it SO RUDE.
Am I wrong? I mean, would you start re-organising your friend/relative’s kitchen if you were there on a visit? Would you do it as a paying guest in someone’s home?Is it ever ok??
I’ve had this happen a few times. This latest incident is not major but it irritates me beyond belief. I don’t mind people putting things back in the wrong place when they clean up but when someone has clearly and deliberately decided to re-arrange how I present the tea and coffee, it sends me into a spin. It’s not just the gob-smacking rudeness of it but it touches on nerve - ok, they’re paying but this is my HOME and they’re a GUEST here. They don’t get to decide how things work. I do. It feels like a passive-aggressive action. Actually, not even passive.
I’m incoherent with rage. Made worse by the fact that the new arrangement is actually better.
But that’s not the point!! They had no right to do it… (digging a hole here)… I put it back to how it was and after they leave tomorrow I’ll change it back. Do I sound ridiculous? I think it’s because it’s a smack-in-the-face reminder that other people are sharing your home and it’s disrespectful to change things, no matter how helpful you think it might be.
Maybe I like it… but doesn’t make it ok that they did it. I was aiming at humour in the last bit! Aagh I’m mad that they did it and aagghh I’m even more mad that it’s an improvement!!
Hang on a minute…do you mean the guest who moved things around did so while you are there sharing the same quarters?! Oh, hell to the no! Did you not confront her/them?
(If not, no wonder you’re fuming and at risk of imploding.)
I wouldn’t chide you for it, I’d be annoyed if someone came in and ‘improved’ things at my place, without my consent. I mean, who the hell do they think they are… and all that.
Yes, exactly that. It’s a room in my home with access to the family kitchen. It’s clearly very lived-in. I have a shelf for guests with some breakfast items and a dedicated place in the fridge etc, but we all share the tea and coffee. That’s why it pisses me off so much. It’s just so rude to re-arrange things in someone else’s home, right?
It’s a territorial thing, I suppose. Your room is all yours while you’re here - do whatever you want. But the rest of the house is shared and it’s common politeness to fit in. I feel like a cat - someone just sprayed on my place!!
I like things left in their places because when I come to clean, I can see what is missing / changed. Everything has to go back into its place or it bugs me until I find it and put it back. It always amazes me when people shift things around… even when they don’t fit there. I scan a room and can immediately tell you the change and the kitchen is always the worst! Mind you with 4 full houses it can get confusing.
I don’t understand these containers. Sugar in cabinet. Flour in freezer. Tea in boxes in the drawer. Take them away and no one can arrange them. Canisters? I haven’t had those since the 80s.
I just spent a week in a whole house rental. On checkout day, we were washing all the dishes and putting them away. There were 6 of us - I didn’t cook so I didn’t take anything out - but I put away after washed. I had no idea where the items originated. What was I to do? There were no pictures. I put things away were I felt were logical. Did I move things on purpose? NO. But I am sure things were not where they originated.
When I was in a shared unit, it was just me. I used, washed, returned immediately. I wouldn’t have intentionally rearrange anything. But… I have a daughter with a bit of OCD. If she saw canisters arranged out of high-to-low order, she might not be able to help herself but to rearrange them. I probably wouldn’t have noticed that she had rearranged them.
Ah! I know this feeling, its like being taken over by a whirwind in your own home. In my v early Air days I had a guest who has this on her profile - “When we travel we treat every place as if it were our own, and aim to leave the place even better than when we arrived.” And what a nightmare THAT was! All her ‘improvements’ involved ranting about how I must write a guide book for her because she is one of those rare people who is ‘too intelligent’ to be given verbal advice and can only follow written instructions. Apparently I should have noticed and catered to her ‘special intelligence’ - ergo she rated me low in communication. She cost me more $ in heating than what she paid to stay each night because she decided to open the windows for days during an epic mid-winter wind storm. She got passive aggressive when I finally discovered this and closed them - also my fault because ‘dont open the windows in winter because it mucks up the heating’ wasn’t written down, it was only verbal. I reckon she needed a written instruction to wipe her a&*# with toilet paper. I’ve learned not to accept anyone who promises to ‘improve’ my place.
