I’ve been in touch with customer service at Airbnb. I’ve resolved this entire situation in a responsible the manner. I’m going to be leaving the group deleting my profile and forgetting all about it. It is proved to be a group that is not in any way up to my expectations for mature positive feedback and solutions that stay on the point and that don’t go off on tangents. I’ve been mocked, told I’m wrong and they at the moderators here have pointed out the error of my ways but I don’t want to accept it and put down for no reason other than people didn’t agree with my views. I tried to be civilized and I haven’t called anybody names although I was accused of it. The one person who commented that one of the commentators was a troublemaker in response to another person saying that they were a well-respected member was apparently deleted immediately.
Unfortunately this group is a cabal like group of people behaving like Antifa actors wanting to quash any views that aren’t their own. I’m sure some of you are familiar with the book Lord of the Flies by William Golding because apparently you’ve taken a page straight out of the book.
In my one year as an Airbnb host I’ve earned super host status and had marvelous reviews from so many guests. I’ve also spent years hosting International students. Apparently this group thinks that they’re here to just mentor and not listen or empathize with another person’s scenario. It’s amazing how this post turned into a offshoot into grammar management manners and every other kind of thought that came across anyone’s mind.
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Honestly? This is a terrible review. It is not meant to be a blog nor the inner workings of your mind and goes on.and on.and on. I actually stopped reading. Your comments about his smoking come off as super nasty and judgemental. Really. If you don’t want smokers to ‘ruin’ a bed (please) have a rule ‘non smokers only’ but don’t invite someone into your home, charge them, allow them to smoke in a designated spot and then bash them in a review and upload pics on line and rant on. I do hope you don’t eat meat, drive a car, are overweight or eat sugary fatty foods that are massive killers and drains on the health system, environment and public purse if you going to be so judge mental about the impact of this poor chap addicted to the legal ciggies.
You really need to start afresh and think about how this review would come across.
I agree with Emily – far to long, far too detailed with non-facts. I too quit reading after “Candidly speaking”, which has not place in a review!
A review should be short and factual, not supposition and innuendo. If you allow smoking anywhere you’re going to have problems. get NO SMOKING! as house rule #1. Where does “one of the major health rules of your host” fit into your house rules? A review is not a place for preaching the evils of smoking!!!
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He smoked and the aroma got inside. YOUR BAD, not his. You allowed him to smoke on the property and he used the sand urn you gave him. Since when is it HIS job to empty that urn?
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He can check out any time he pleases – you aren’t his jailer. He went to the App rather than you because that’s what is supposed to do happen. The guest goes to Air, not you.
Your Public review should be something like:
Jack was an amiable guest, with lots of travel experience. He left a day early to spend time with friends elsewhere. Although he smoked out in the smoking area, the aroma did carry back into the apartment.
Does this mean what I think it means? Are you under the impression that your review will only show if he posts one for you? Your review will show after 14 days regardless of what he does.
As for your question in the title, it’s hard to say. What is intolerable to one person is not a problem for another host. I just had a guest show up unannounced 2 hours before my earliest allowed check in time. He didn’t ask or even inform me of his expected arrival time. I was quite put out by it and plan to make it the basis of my review and rating but another host would be fine with an early arrival and appreciate that he was otherwise a good guest. And if someone instant books with hosts with no requirements, like me, the reviews don’t matter much.
I hate smoking as much as anyone and am quite judgmental about it (as Emily would say). I would not post this review and wouldn’t want to stay with a host who did.
Oh noooooooo
Please don’t leave that review!
If you allowed outdoor smoking (you DID by giving him permission) you have no right to later preach about habits, pollution, health issues or anything else. If you granted him the alteration you also don’t have grounds to complain about doing so. Frankly, I don’t blame him for leaving early.
The rest of it sounds like an incoherent rant and will probably get removed anyway.
Honestly I would not leave a review at all.
Totally side tracked by that photo of the butts… I am not a smoker but I am frugal. Why does someone only smoke half a cigarette/cigarillo ?!
Also - the suggested review does seem way out there. Good you opted to ask for advice and opinions.
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Sometimes this Forum can be very helpful to vent about bad experiences so when the review is posted it’s less emotional.
Hope your next guest is an improvement! 
Wait a second lady.
You gave this guest permission to smoke and then complained about him smoking.
That’s like me telling my kids they can’t have cookies, giving them cookies anyway and then complaining because they ate cookies.
Exactly what is judgmental about that situation? Do enlighten us.
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(Oh-oh…everybody duck!)
As long as I’m up, I’m going to throw in my two cents on this.
The problem is that you (the OP) are sending mixed signals. You asked this community of hosts for input because you wanted to “see what comments people had” about your proposed guest review.
The hosts responded and their critique was the guest appeared to have acted properly because he smoked in the allowed area. You disagreed and declared everyone was “judgmental” and it was the guest who was at fault by breaking your smoking rule.
The issue is not with your no-smoking rule but that your actions did not support it. If you had told or reminded the guest that he was in violation of your smoking policy and was not allowed to smoke anywhere on your property, it would have been clearer and that you were enforcing your policy.
However, in your own words you stated, “I let him smoke out on the steps…and finally gave him an urn filled with sand so he’d have somewhere to put the butts.” By providing your guest with an ashtray (regardless of your reason for doing so), you were implicitly allowing him to continue smoking on your porch.
When you discovered your guest was a smoker, you stated you had only two options, to “ask him to leave or give him a responsible way to discard his cigarette butts.” Really? Other than asking him to leave, the second option should have been to tell him not to smoke anywhere on your property.
The point is to be aware of giving mixed signals…and not shoot the messengers - your fellow hosts.
(BTW, konacoconutz is the well-respected senior moderator of this forum.)
Please try not to be offended. People here are just trying to help you in your business with suggestions. We recently had a guest who we did not recommend when doing her review. One thing we said was that her communication and punctuality needed to greatly improve. We didn’t go into all the details of what she did. So when you do a review, try to keep it short, factual and to the point. That’s all people were trying to tell you.
Smoking is a difficult subject. We have a no smoking policy as well. But that won’t stop people from smelling like smoke. You can have a rule that’s more restrictive by saying no smoking inside or anywhere on the property. But that won’t stop people from walking off your property and smoking. They will still smell like smoke. It’s a part of doing business.
We recently had an older woman who overused her perfume. The room smelled like her perfume for days after she left. Even after washing her pillows, they still smelled like perfume. What can I do about that? I can have a rule that says no cologne or perfume. But, it hasn’t been a big problem and people who wear appropriate amounts would be turned away.
You can have a rule saying only non-smokers can stay at your place. But you will lose some business. If the smell of cigarettes bothers you that much and you’re willing to accept fewer guests, then do that. We have a host in our area who asks guests not to wash their clothes in regular laundry detergent BEFORE they come to stay. She’s so sensitive that even sitting on her furniture in clothes that have been washed in regular detergent will bother her. That’s her right as a host to stipulate that. So if you don’t want guests who smell like cigarettes, you’ll have to have a strict non-smokers only rule not just no smoking indoors rule. But you can’t blame this guest for smelling like smoke when you didn’t forbid it specifically to begin with.
Your comments to and about one of our longstanding members @konacoconutz were rude and unnecessary. You did say you gave permission to the guest to smoke.
@konacoconutz has provided lots of useful advice and support to members over the years.
The only ‘issues’ on this thread appear to be yours.
I’m sure as a decent person now you have seen that you are incorrect, you will publicly apologise to @konacoconutz on this forum in the same way that you derided her.
Oh dear, perhaps we need some toggle buttons!
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I want everyone’s well-considered advice, which I will take in the spirit given and thank you for.
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Just venting, y’all! No need to spend time on suggestions, but a “gosh how awful” would be appreciated…Gentle recommendations may be snuck into your response, however.
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I’m flying my righteous anger flag and just want to be validated! Any advice contrary to my position/interpretation will be vigorously rebutted!
You aren’t allowed to come here and call names when people took time out of their day to comment on your situation. You just didn’t like being shown you were in the wrong.
And also some more advice for you.
If you want to continue posting here, I wouldn’t be shouting orders to any member of the moderation team. You need to calm down and be civil or your days here are numbered. Consider that an official warning.
And lastly, You should have told the guest to stop smoking. Instead you gave him an ashtray.
This is off the “smoking” aspect of the thread: I have a policy that if someone talks to me face to face, and politely asks me if they can check out a day early, then I grant their request. However, if they send me this same request through the Airbnb app, then I don’t grant the request. This is just my little way of rewarding people who still try to communicate in person. On the other hand, I wouldn’t put any of this in a review. An Airbnb review should be brief and stick to the information other hosts need to know. It isn’t the place to address the breakdown of communication skills in our society.
Your policy is unfair to the guests who try to follow the suggestions on the Airbnb website and from virtually everyone except you who posts on message boards that all communication should be on the Airbnb email system.
Hi Ellen, I believe you have a run-on sentence here. How about this: “Your policy is unfair to the guests who try to follow the suggestion of the Airbnb website, which states that all communication should be on the Airbnb email system.” Perhaps you could omit the words “virtually everyone except you who posts on message boards”, because it is is just an ad hominem that isn’t necessary to make your main point. Just a suggestion.