Foreign guest family over, parents stay in house and cook all day

[GoodbyeSandy]

I would definitely offer a refund and ask them to move to more appropriate accommodations. I think when you explain to the son that his not telling you that his parents would be in your home all day and intended to use your kitchen constantly is not the way the trust based system on Airbnb works. Especially on instant book. Explain to him that guests are expected to explain anything that a host might need to know before booking so that they know the host will be fine with the arrangement. Many hosts would not be ok with full time parents moved into a home, never leaving and doing such heavy cooking. It needn’t be confrontational, but he should understand that their stay would have been better suited to a whole home/apartment, or otherwise checking first with a host that might be out for the day and doesn’t mind the parents home cooking all day.

To give a refund you will be given the option after they cancel their booking. It is all through Airbnb. Personally I would help them find somewhere more suitable in a similar price range if you can, or inquire with other hosts if their situation would make them more happy to take the booking.

[konacoconutz]

Kasage, to be clear, you are never, ever penalized for declining a booking for any reason you deem. They will try to get you to change your mind of course because they greedily want all the bookings they can get, but you are not penalized.

To answer your other question, all the refunding happens through the Air system. The only thing they say you can transact in cash is tax.

Do talk to the son and let us know what happens. Just say it is not working out and you need to help them find another place to stay. Call Air and open a case now.

[dcmooney]

I don’t know if they would be offended or not, cabinhost. I would say that a general blanket statement in your rules, perhaps I don’t have any good advice on that one! I can only say that most of my Chinese friends have been aware that to westerners their cooking ‘stinks’.

Something in your rules about being mindful that cooking certain foods and/or spices can leave odors that linger and this could cause forfeiture of a portion of the security deposit? Tie it in with the rule of no smoking?

Does the kitchen have outside ventilation? Post a reminder to turn the fan on whenever cooking? I’m just thinking of ideas…

One person’s odor is another persons tantalizing scent…

Has anyone had an issue with cooking odors lingering? Was it fixed with a good cleaning? How did it get fixed?

Maybe what we should all do if find out how to eliminate cooking odors in a short time. I have an air cleaner in the area where people cook because there’s no outside ventilation - but it’s not heavy cooking. The air cleaner does seem to do the trick. But what if it gets into furniture? I think some research ahead of time will save aggravation later.

You’re right that no one wants to check in and smell the cooking from the prior guest.

Would love to hear what others say.

[Yana]

When my guests cooked fish with some spices it smelled awful but smell was pretty much gone within 24 hours. I had to open all windows and turn down AC for a few hours. I think they got the hint and never cooked fish again.
I just had an inquiry for 2 weeks from a woman who asked about cooking. One more time I had an evidence that people don’t read rules. She asked me about full access to kitchen and explained that she loves to cook. I told her that I allow only very basic cooking with no animal products except eggs and I never heard from her again. The same was with 2 guys from Brasil. As soon as I said " no meat" in my house they booked with someone else. They also wanted for 2 weeks.
I come to conclusion that with limited cooking rule my house is not good for stays over 1 week. People dont want to go out all the time to eat. It gets expensive for them . But they want cheap accomodation and on top of that to save money on outings.

[sunshine1]

Ah just an unfortunate situation then. Thats the problem with instant book as well , if guests dont offer any info up first. Maybe just learn from it, and change your rules. I used to offer kitchen use in my place, but now I state that the kitchen is completely out of bounds except for breakfast, and this hasnt stopped me getting bookings. My main reasons was because i’m a strict veggie, guests were always putting fish and meat in the fridge, and off course like yourself some guests were forever cooking in it. Funny enough these were also Chinese! Just a culture thing I guess. Goodluck in getting it sorted. If you cant cope any more with it just give them a refund and bid them good riddens;)

[cabinhost]

You would think people wanting to save on food costs would be purchasing cheap processed bologna, Kraft processed american cheese, and hot dogs, with cheap processed Wonder Bread and hotdog buns. I know it is extremely unhealthy to be eating processed foods.

But I just can’t see them saving money on buying all this different meat and veggies, spices, and oils to spend hours cooking on end. I wonder how much of it has to be left behind.

If I was traveling on a budget then I would be cooking fried egg sandwiches for breakfast and maybe baking some frozen hash rounds. For dinner it would be cheap pasta with processed spaghetti sauce out of a jar. It would be probably be a meat sauce so not sure if that would be okay since it comes in a jar (for vegetarian hosts). But I certainly wouldn’t be cooking up storms in order to save money.

For the vegetarian hosts, can guests bake frozen processed food like chicken egg rolls? If I wasn’t allowed, I would still be able to adjust just fine.

[cabinhost]

I forgot the all time processed food…Ramen noodles. Yes, I would be doing light cooking like that if I was really a starving traveler. Beef flavor is my favorite though. Would you vegetarians allow that? - no real meat in it.

[Yana]

I would allow what you mention. It’s fast, and it won’t stink up the whole house.
My cooks had a mixture of really good meat with really cheap spagetti and bread. In their situation they were here on training for roller blade competition and they trained 4 hours a day. Then of course they ate enormous amount of food. That’s why for them it was too expensive to eat out.
They left some stuff, like spagetti, Nutella , proteins powder that I can’t even use as it’s very high calories kind for building muscles I guess.
Like it was said here, if you know you will be cooking so much then rent the whole house not room and then go through someone’s kitchen like this with total disregard for hosts. I would feel so uncomfortable acting like them in someone’s house.

[cabinhost]

I was trying to find solutions like what DC mentioned. Because like I said before, I would be hesitant to renting to someone who would put me at risk of getting next guests checked in. If they rented for a full week and were disgusted by the smell, then they may demand a full refund.

This was an interesting read: http://www.thekitchn.com/how-do-i-get-rid-of-my-neighbo-119540

Glad to hear that the quick processed meats wouldn’t bother you because they aren’t stinking up the house. But even if you didn’t want them in your fridge I would still respect that. What about bringing back pizza with sausage and other meats? They only stink up the house for a while while heated. Can you tell I am waiting on my dinner…lol? - I am talking about food. But I learn a lot from you others.

[Yana]

Cabinhost, I believe that ANY non vegeterian cooking will be fine if it guests didnt overdo it.
Though we are vegeterians when my cooks asked me about kitchen I didnt hesitate saying “Yes”, because I could not imagine someone would cook in this quantity while not in their home and sharing a house with owners.

At that time I only hosted for 3 months and mostly had spring breakers or very young couples who didnt touch my kitchen,so i had no experience whatsoever with what to say and how to handle this situation. When i finally found this forum, my cooks were already gone andi was lookingfor some advice to prevent this ina future.

Smells yes, there were smells but not to the point that could not get rid of them for more that 24 hours. I have an oil burning going on more often and that took care of the problem. Though it was pretty unbearable to me to come home to a smell of fish in some vinegary sause
I am not a kindof vegeterian who will not let other people store, cook and eat meat in my house. I made my choice with food but I am ok with other people’s choices.
Soi don’t think you should worry much about persistent smells for a long time in your cabin.
The only reason I put vegeterian cooking only is because I want to discourage die hard cooks to rent from me. Honestly I think there should be unwritten rule that cooking is not part of the game if only private room is rented unless specifically is offered by a host.
When I posted here first time the question about my non stop cooks, someone answered that use of a kitchen is a huge sell out point. I really don’t understand why? I thought the huge sellout point of Airbnb is to provide much cheaper accomodation with may be an ability to make tea and store a bit of a produce In a fridge but not to use your hosts kitchen for home made meals. This is how I travelled for years with no expectation whatsoever that I can freely roam on someone’s kitchen with hosts living In a same house.
. As I am on IB anyone can book me, and if they start mad cooking at least I can stop by referring to my rules.
2 people for the past week only didnt book as soon as I told them about meatless cooking. Usually people who are planning to heavily use my kitchen inquire before hand and it is always a question if they can fully use it.

I think I am getting this issue under control with everyone’s help here. With my first experience I couldn’t even say anything to cooks as I myself told them , yes, of course., you càn cook:)

[cabinhost]

While it is a draw for travelers to save money on cooking, the only guests I get that do heavy cooking are families that are staying for a week. They may have four kids with them. Even my couples who have the whole place to themselves don’t do intense cooking. I can tell by how much garbage is left behind, and the uneaten items they leave behind.

I still find it odd that people would choose to travel to an area and spend endless hours inside. But I suppose it is just a cultural thing, and your area attracts many international travelers. Thankfully I have only had one Canadian family, and one Australian family.

In my area, since it is rural it can be expensive to go out to eat because the only thing offered is sit down restaurants, and they are so overpriced - except for the local grocery store that does offer a plate from the hot bar for breakfast, lunch, and dinner. Lunch and dinner are full meals for only $5. Breakfast costs even less. You can order over the counter and take the food to the cafe area. You can’t get cheaper than that. And in big cities there are so many places to get food where you don’t have to sit down in a restaurant and leave a tip.

It’s like your guest who wanted to fry fish - how much money can you save after you buy the meat, seasoning/breading, ingredients to make tartar or cocktail sauce, oil to fry in, etc. - probably wanted to make homemade hush puppies, and cole slaw too. Long John Silvers seems a heck of a lot easier…lol.

[dcmooney]

Hi Cabinhost!

I have three kids, and while eating out is expensive, the worst part for me is having to figure out where to go, not knowing if it will be good or not, having to wait for the food, etc. And THEN paying for it!

But I do all my cooking at home the week before - stews, soups, etc., then freeze in zip-loc bags and tote along. I dump the days soup in a pot, warm it up, and we’re all enjoying a hot bowl of something after a long day.

But real cooking on holiday is not for me.

But here’s a guess - people who really enjoy cooking but are prohibited by work and school schedules - who really enjoy that process - and enjoy doing it away from home…

even as I type that I think Naaaaaah…

[dcmooney]

THAT was quite an article. What a nightmare for some people! Cabin, are your guests normally week-long or more?

I think I’ll add something to my rules about spices and cooking… I only have one hot plate in their cooking area. Hmmmm

[Sandra_Dodd]

I’m not really sure what the problem is. You rented your house, I assume with kitchen privileges. So its fair game. If you need to use the kitchen then express that through the son that from X pm-Y pm you will need them to not be in there, Honestly you took their money and you have guests. Unless its against your house rules I don’t see how you can prohibit normal use. When they booked you knew they were from thousands of miles away and probably would not have a car. As for don’t speak a word of English, you mentioned that twice. Why does this bother you? Because you cant tell them to please leave the kitchen? Because it makes you uncomfortable? At least they are not expecting you to personally entertain them all day. I picked up on “cooking their Chinese food”, not simply “cooking”. I’m not sure what you meant by this. If were burgers and macaroni would it be okay?

As for being a victim (there is nothing I can do") in this situation, I don’t agree. Having booked with instant book does not mean you cannot ask for adjustments. I am wondering if the real issue is he paid for one person and now “he” is three? Well for that you can send an amendment to the reservation through the reservation system. The son will receive that electronically. They are Asian, not obtuse. Asian culture has high context, low content communication (High-Context & Low-Context Cultures. In a high-context culture, the social context or social environment is more important than the words being spoken. This means that in a high context culture, nonverbal communication is even more important than in low-context cultures.) They are able to feel the environment around them. If you send an amendment to three people then that would be enough. If you booked three people, then you have them. If you don’t enjoy hosting people from other cultures then perhaps instant book is not the tool for you to use; it does allow for less vetting. I am sure if you are not purposely masking your emotions then they know SOMETHING is up, perhaps they don’t know just what.

Hosting people from other cultures is a great way to experience their culture without paying for the travel. If you don’t care for that experience then perhaps that may be part of the problem and its not them. Sometimes I have to take the time when an issue arises and decide where my part starts and they other party’s part ends.

I may be the only one so far to write about it; but I see the guests side. They paid and whats wrong with a little excessive cooking. Ask for a tasting, you might like it. ITS ACTUAL CHINESE FOOD, not the restaurant version.

[Yana]

By “Chinese food”, OP ment many spices with strong smell.
The booking was for 3 people, so the son did nothing wrong, he didnt bring extra people.
I have international guests all the time, but certain cultures tend to cook much more. In my case we have quite a few visitors from Latin America, and they were the only ones that cooked. Europians usually are more on a shy side, always ask and respect your space.
In my culture, and I am from Eastern Europe, we would never “attack” someone kitchen like that. In my culture it’s very impolite to open someone’s fridge without permission and go through someone’s pots and pans. And use someone’s produce if not invited to do so. When I traveled as a guest I never even considered that along with my room that I pay 3 times less than hotel, I assume automatically kitchen privileges in that extent. For me kitchen in my hist’s house was a huge extra favor that hosts do for me and no way that are obligated to do so. Every time I needed to make tea, I wanted to be sure I am not interfering.
In my understanding it was ONLY when I rent a whole house that’s when I can use kitchen as much as I want.
That’s why for me it’s very hard to understand why guests assume that because they rented a room it automatically includes kitchen privileges such as cooking. Cooking is a heavy stuff . It’s not just make a cup of tea or warm up something, or make a toast. It includes all different smells, burning and breaking thing, making a mess that is usualy not cleaned well by guests, disturbing piece and quiete of hosts by kitchen noices for hours .
Even if it says that a full use of a kitchen is allowed, in my eyes it was to the limit anyway. In no wayi was going to make meatloaf and occupy my host’s kitchen for hours a day.
But obviously not for all nations it is a common sense. That’s we need to be very specific in kitchen rules to avoid it and by no means we as hosts need to feel obligated to open our kitchen to travelers at all.

[EllenN]

Hi kasage00,

I see that a lot of posters are fixated on and judgmental about the amount of time guests spend cooking. For some people cooking is creative and relaxing. In fact, some people plan their vacations around cooking classes. Also, people in many cultures only eat their culture’s food and have a hard time enjoying food that is foreign to them. Many of my Chinese guests have been very happy to be in a home where cooking is permitted so that they can cook Chinese food. Personally, I’m happy as long as they share.

It sounds like the best thing for you would be to explain to the son that you are uncomfortable cooking in a kitchen while others are cooking and that you need to set a schedule. For the record, I have no problem cooking at the same time as guests are cooking. I just assign them certain burners and one of the countertops and cutting boards. Do you have a fan over your stove? If so, you can ask the son to ask his parents to use it at all times while cooking to dissipate the smells. Also, if it’s not too cold they can open the windows while they cook. As far as baking goes, most Chinese people don’t have ovens in their houses and don’t use them so there probably won’t be any competition for your oven.

[cabinhost]

dc - my stays range from 2 nights to 1 week. Current guests are in for 5 nights. Next guests are in for 4 nights. I was very surprised with that article and how the smell seeped into the walls, etc. You’re probably safe with the one hot plate…lol.

Sandra - I don’t believe anyone here has anything against guests from a different culture. The son booked for three guests and nothing in his previous reviews indicated that the two extra guests would be people staying in all the time and taking over the kitchen. Even in my rental, where guests are renting the entire place and have paid for full access of the kitchen - it is still a concern if I am unable to check the next guests in due to not being able to remove odors. What if the next guest calls Airbnb within 24 hrs. of check in and say the smell of the rental is just unbearable? Now I have lost a booking and won’t get paid.

This is no different than someone wearing strong perfumes and cologne. Imagine a family of strong perfume wearers getting the scent all over the upholstered furniture, into all the spare blankets, pillows, etc. I read recently where a family stayed long term and left moth balls hidden in the house. Later guests were provided a refund and no one could figure out where the odor was coming from. The owner ended up spending thousands between trying to find the odor and refunding guests.

It’s just so tricky to try to balance allowing guests to use something they paid for, but at the same time not allowing it to cost the owner money in refunds to potential guests.

[dcmooney]

Well said, it is tricky. And just because something of a different culture makes us uncomfortable (Mariachi music at 2 a.m. anyone?) doesn’t mean we don’t like that culture (Chicken Mole from a (different) neighbor, anyone?). It just means we don’t like that noise, or odor, or horn-honking…

Crazy story about the moth balls.

And yes, the cologne thing is real. Our first guests - super nice, enjoyed getting to know them, but on the last morning the dude doused himself in cologne and it lingered. Not as obnoxious as some cooking smells, and thankfully no one complained…but speaking of culture, we once had 4 very nice guys - students - from India. Every time I mention airbnb rules, or working on the listing, my son says “Mom, be sure to say - NO PERFUME - those guys were so stinky!!!”. Luckily (odor-wise) they were here only one night.

But back to you, Kasage00 - what’s happening with mamma and babba?

[GoodbyeSandy]

I think the words ‘fixated’ and judgmental are pretty strong indeed. I know it’s difficult to understand when you are so happy to share your kitchen.

Are you home all day? Understanding that everyone has different requirements for personal space and a sense of privacy and control of their environment helps us all. Many people do need to feel that guests understand the concept that they are guests, which is clearly a grey area for some, but should come with a few clues for those interested in being a good guest that cares also that their host is feeling comfortable with their activities.

For starters, the son could and should have checked in with the host by now. Obviously it was a bad omen from the start that the failed to mention his housebound parents that love to cook without checking if this would work for the host, but by now he has had plenty of opportunity to check in and see how the host is coping with three new people in his home, two of which are unable to communicate at all, never leave the home and cook strong smelling food so often that the host is not always able to access his kitchen when he would like.

Cooking styles vary dramatically. Some people are terribly messy cooks, others tidy and minimal, some, as we are hearing here are prolific and cook very smelly food. We all love Chinese, but would we all want to smell it 24/7 as if we were living in a Chinese restaurant? Trying to have some understanding of how others might be feeling, instead of just responding about how you might feel in the same situation can really help people in stressful situations.

Obviously this host was not prepared for this, and many hosts would be concerned about the smells while living in it, and what may linger after 6 weeks of non stop Chinese cooking.

Personally working from home myself (as does my husband)’ we would absolutely want to know if a long term guest was going to be home all day. We never feel totally free to relax until we have the space back to ourselves for a while, and we have plenty of space, so I can only imagine what it is like for hosts in smaller or regular sized homes. You are constantly aware of other people’s presence and how any noise you make may bother them. It is hard to totally relax and just be yourselves if you are the kind of people/person that need/sprivacy to do that.

Why on earth was WilliB’s message flagged? This is becoming a sad place to be, if people can’t express themselves without fear of the flag police.

In all the talk (or imaginings) of racially based issues here, I only wish to myself that others had lived with the Chinese as I did for two years. You would understand that Chinese are as elitist as any race I’ve met in my wide travels. None of this has to do with race. Whether or not hosts think he signed his life away because he offered use of the kitchen, there are ways for a guests to be good and considerate. This means checking in with your host and making sure they are ok with how things are going.

I believe many guests rely on the idea that hosts will be too uncomfortable to mention how they feel about the situation so they can keep doing whatever they like. Whatever others say, when a host is unhappy and uncomfortable in their own home it’s not all because they are stupid, they deserve it, or because they are unwelcoming hosts that just aren’t prepared to give as much as you have to. Sometimes it really is because a guest or guests aren’t interested in anyone besides themselves, and will treat a host and their home like a hostel. This is obviously not what we hope for as an experience using Airbnb. We hope to make new relationships that foster understanding, and share in ways that work for all. Clearly at the moment this situation is one sided, and it needs to be sorted out. Let’s support the host, as he is feeling outnumbered in his home, and hasn’t had any space to reflect, except for when he leaves his home. It must feel like being run out of your house, at least it would to me.

[EllenN]

Hi Sandy,

Yes, I am home all day. I know that I have an unusually high tolerance for having other people around.

The point I was trying to make is that instead of discussing whether the guests cooking habits are right or wrong it would be a good idea to discuss a solution. To me the solution to the original poster’s problem would be to work out a kitchen schedule with the son and ask him to tell his parents or to help him to find a different Airbnb listing where heavy cooking is permitted.