Counting Down, Thank you & The Dog's Revenge

I’m about to stop hosting. Since starting in May 2015, I’ve hosted 130 groups. It’s been good, it’s been hard work, I’ve come across some wonderful people, and I’ve had to tolerate some awful ones. And I’ve made some money - which was the whole point in the first place. I’ve been a Superhost since the first assessment and have worked my butt off to keep it.

I’ve learned a lot on this forum and have appreciated having a place to vent. For that, and to all of you who have listened and given feedback, THANK YOU! Really. But I just can’t find enough reserve in the tank to cope with a certain type of guest anymore - so before I leave, permit me one last vent.

Maxine and her husband arrived by car. From the first curt statement of ‘oh the room’s upstairs’ (Paragraph 1 of the listing) to pointedly holding the door of the room to dismiss me one minute after their arrival as I was mid-sentence explaining where they could park, to the wrinkled nose at my restaurant recommendations (Oh, we don’t eat that kind of food) to the disappointment that there was no TV (paragraph 3 of the listing) to the complaints about the internet speed, to the complete absence of thank you or please (even to offering them a very late check out as I was going away for the night) to leaving the room in a generally sloppy state with food left out, it was a horrible experience with horrible guests. And I just know I will not be able to tolerate another middle class, middle-aged, ill-mannered, Australian or English guest. I must stop hosting before I tell the next one to shove their ‘chippy, ‘Airbnbs-are-so-beneath-me’ attitude where the sun doesn’t shine. And the worst part? I’m a middle-aged, middle class Australian from English descent! Arrgh. How can my own kind be so completely awful?

I do not plan to leave a review. You cannot teach people manners - and her only crime is having a gormless husband and an unpleasant personality - not things I’m asked to rate.

So what’s with the ‘The Dog’s Revenge?’ We arrived home on Sunday night – the day of Maxine’s check-out and the day after I’d left to go away. On going out to the room to strip the beds, I noticed three large, dried-out dog turds across the path to the room. My old Labrador has nerve damage and the result means his business is often spread across an area of several metres while he walks. But how did that happen? His area is through two gates, and he never has access to the Airbnb terrace. And the property is completely gated from the street and he was away with us for the night.

The only answer I have is that my dear old dog was able to express his displeasure with the guests in way that I could not.


Sorry about all the poor guests However I must say that if a guest has to read through three or more paragraphs to understand what they are getting, it’s no wonder you’ve had trouble – Everything you need to describe your place should be in the first paragraph a guests sees when the open up your listing. GUESTS SIMPLY DO NOT READ.

I appreciate your comment but it’s not the point. If people can’t read three paragraphs of four sentences or less then I think the issue is not mine. The night I was away from my guests, I stayed in an Airbnb. The stench coming from the shower drain was unbelievable. I politely told my host that I was just giving her the heads up that there may be some sort of problem with the drains as it smelt like sewerage. Polite. It’s all people need to be. Ever.


Sounds like you had a good run! Typical to get awful guests as your last ever though. I dare you to leave the WORST review you’ve ever written… they deserve it and you have nothing to lose!


Too funny! You’re right - nothing to lose and believe me, I have mentally written that review many time as follows: Tell others what it was like hosting Maxine: Answer: stressful, soul-destroying, head-banglingly frustrating. Tell Maxine what she could do to improve: Answer: Stop looking down your nose at people and remember to say thank you and please. Do you have any advice for Maxine?: Answer: Yes, watch the dog poo on your way out the door. :wink:


Yup… You have all the classic signs of Airbnb burnout. I rarely get that type of guest anymore but I know exactly the kind you mean. For some reason, most (not all) guests do read every word not only of my listing but also of my novella length guest info document.

I tried so hard in my early years to figure out why I was attracting lousy guests… And some of it had to do with the fact that i was too vague in my listing combined with desperation to take almost anyone. I now describe specifically the kind of guest I want. It’s not a perfect art, but I rarely get the entitled guest you describe. I turn down the ones with red flags.

Take a break and come back to it?


Yup! Burnout. But it’s to be expected. I am solidly booked every month with most stays averaging around 2-3 nights and I do all the cleaning myself. I have IB so I don’t pick and choose guests. I know IB isn’t for everyone, but it more than tripled my bookings. I like the idea of describing specifically the type of guest you want. What do you say?

Kona, how do you get the guests you want? I’m yet to figure this out. Would love to know a little bit of how to word your listing to achieve this


With respect, I think that’s a mistake. They sound terrible. You should leave a review, then no other host will accept them, probably. And if they do, they’ll have a reasonable idea of what they let themselves in for.


Kona has a magical invisible bad-guest-repelling force field dome which stretches over the Big Island. :slight_smile:


I must say that as a host in Australia I always groan when a booking comes through from an Australian guest. I find they do have unrealistically high expectations and do have an attitude of “I’m better than AirBNB” - so why book it! I had one guy sit at my table and talk for 15 minutes about how great he was and how high his airline status is (until I told him I was Platinum to his Gold… ouch, his pride!).

Aussies are generally not suited to this sort of thing. I breath a sigh of relief when a booking comes through from a young German/Austrian/Dutch etc couple!


This could be a big burnout contributor. However, think about it. What good is it to triple your bookings if you have to close up shop years too early due to burnout? :smiley:

Maybe you should go off IB for a bit and slow down a little? Just a suggestion.


LOL! I wish… But I think it is due to a few things. One of which is pre planning. Most people visiting Hawaii plan it quite far ahead and are looking for just the right accommodations in the right place.

I start by telling them if they are looking to walk to nightlife and starbux this is not the place. If they want to see stars and hear surf and whales, that’s more like us. This is not a fancy resort hotel room, nor should you expect it to be. It’s a homey, comfy studio apartment in a family house in a family neighborhood with everything you need for a relaxing vacation on the Kona side.

Later on, I describe the kind of guest I want to host.

“I’m only interested in hosting quiet respectful self sufficient guests looking for a centrally located… Blah blah blah…” Please make sure the apartment and its location are a fit for you before booking."


Wilbur… Define gormless… That’s an Aussie word I’ve never heard before. I assume from context it means gutless or worthless. Or maybe useless.

Garden, I will PM you …

Hi @konacoconutz,

I’ve come to the conclusion that some level of pre-screening is a must, in the form of chatting to ones prospective guests beforehand. I suspect you’ve come to a similar conclusion. Of course, this is no guarantee of anything, but one hopes that wackjobs will let something slip to reveal that they are trouble.

Now, I wonder if there is a graceful way to say that I’d prefer people make an inquiry first and try to figure out if the place is right for them, without sounding weird. The Airbnb booking request puts pressure on one to make a decision quickly. I realise this is by design, but I don’t like making decisions quickly. Just saying.

Where do you say all this? I know you’ve sent me your listing link, but I’d have to dig for it.

‘gormless’ is definitely not Australian English. It’s an old word - it’s been around in British English (the original flavour) for centuries.


[quote=“faheem, post:16, topic:9919”]
Where do you say all this? I know you’ve sent me your listing

That might be paraprashing… As I say, it’s never ever a sure thing…

In my house rules, the last thing I say is, please make sure the studio and its location are a fit for you before booking.

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It’s just a regular English word - means lacking initiative, not very self-aware, stupid.

And I applied it to the husband as he stood there with his head cocked to one side, frowning at his wife as though he couldn’t quite believe how rude she was being, but did nothing.

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Yes, IB is part of the reason for the burnout. But I had to do it because of the time-zone. People emailed or messaged during the middle of the night while I was asleep - I’d get up first thing in the morning and respond and they’d tell me they’d already booked something. Younger hosts who were awake late - or Instant Booking.

But you are absolutely right. I started hosting as we were desperately short of cash. Now I have a full time job (working from home) and being fully-booked means working really long days to get everything done.

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