Changed my house rules for kitchen use

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So I have these Asian guests and I have offered full access to my kitchen but why made me change that since , they cook heavy meals with strong smells and leave a mess on my stove and don’t wash the pots and pans they use , I am to embarrassed to say anything because they are nice and always offer me food when they cook but omg I changed my rules to no more use of the stove top or oven , and they can only preare light meals in my kitchen using the microwave

Have any of you changed your rules because of guests like these???

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Yes. I too allowed kitchen use in the beginning and it didn’t work out.

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I see you’ve experienced a bit of a culture shock, there @Gandyv8! :smile: Please tell me that when you say “guests like these,” you are referring to their behavior… :fearful:

Well, Asians will understandably cook with Asian spices and sauces that will emit “strong smells.” Just as you were unaware that this is typical to their cuisine, they are probably just as clueless that they have offended you in any way simply by the aroma of their food. So I don’t think they should be faulted for that.

As far as the heavy cooking is concerned, well…you allowed them “full access” to your kitchen, and therein lies the problem. Sharing a kitchen with your guests does pose quite a few challenges, including guests’ cooking interfering with the host’s own cooking shedules. And that is why some hosts have gone the same route as you by only allowing “light cooking”. It is your home and you are free to make and change the rules for future guests. :slight_smile:

PSA: Do note though that certain types of fish, fish sauce, and certain spices (such as curry, anise seeds) heated in the microwave will still emit strong smells, so you might want to consider that, too…

Now, not washing the pots and pans and being extremely messy in the kitchen is not typical Asian behavior and is unacceptable regardless of ethnicity. I’m curious as to why you are hesitant/embarrassed to ask them to clean up after themselves? Is it difficult to tell them they are allowed to cook but they must wash what they have used?

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I allow access to my kitchen and use of utilities. The other day I got not the best review and one of the issues was the “awkwardness” of sharing the kitchen with the family of the house. Like, really?!

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This is exactly why I don’t allow kitchen access. We treat our guests as guests and not like part of a commune! Of course, we let them put something in the refrigerator or use the microwave but actually this very rarely happens. Our guests like our French catering style! We’ve been hosts since 2010 and it’s working fine!

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This issue arose for us recently. It was not so much the smells (plenty of these though), it was the time spent in the kitchen! At least 4 hours each day some hours in the morning chopping and cutting then boiling things madly in the evening. Eventually we took to eating out since we have a car and they faced a 30 minute walk to the nearest eatery. They did wash up and they offered me some of their food to try but to be honest it was no better than we can cook in 30 minutes. In the end I showed them how to cook rice in the microwave and to their credit they let me do this and were astounded that it worked so well. Since this group (4) like you we have restricted use of the kitchen/dining area by agreement in the first place and to no more than 45 minutes. In the review I tried to gently tell them that although they were very nice people, use of the kitchen in a BnB is a concession, not charged for and they might try to minimise their time in this shared space in the future.

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